PEOPLE
------------
"YOU TALKED ABOUT ME TO HER...
IN NEGATIVE LIGHT. SHAME ON YOU." BS
----------------------------------------------------
CRUELTY AND TENDERNESS
GOES HAND IN HAND
SHOW THE UGLY SIDE OF YOU
TO THE UGLY ONES...
THEN, THEY WILL LEAVE YOU ALONE.
IF YOU ARE KINDHEARTED TO THE UGLY
THEY WILL DESTROY YOU WITH THEIR UGLINESS.
BE RESRVE, DISTANT NO MATTER WHAT!
PEOPLE GENERALLY ARE DOUBLE FACED
GOSSIPY AND UN-TRUSTWORTHY
THEY CAN BE DANGEROUS IN THEIR NONSENSICAL TALK
THEY WILL ALWAYS UNDERMINE YOU IN YOUR ABSENCE
TO YOUR FACE ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY NEED SOMETHING
FROM YOU LIKE TO PRAISE YOU...
AND AFTER THEY GET WHAT THEY WANT
THE PRAISE WILL VANISH...
BE AWARE...
MOST OF THE PEOPLE HAVE NO IDEA OF SOPHISTICATION
WHICH ALSO COMES FROM EDUCATION, EMPATHY AND SUFFERING
LACK OF KNOWLEDGE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE, AND OTHER
PEOPLE'S CULTURE IS THE TARGET OF DISCRIMINATION
INSTEAD OF BEING HURT, YOU SHOULD
FEEL SORRY FOR THEIR IGNORANCE...AND
UNFORTUNATE NATURE OF NOT TRYING TO
KNOW ANOTHER HUMAN BEING WELL.
----------------
PSYCHOANALYSIS
---------------
"PSYCHOANALYSIS IS PRIMARILY A METHOD
OF DIAGNOSING AND TREATING CERTAIN MENTAL AND NERVOUS DISORDER."???
"CONCENTRATION ON THE MAN DISTRACTS US FROM HIS WORK." ???
"AN EXISTENTIAL MAN ENGAGED IN THE ATTEMPT
TO ACHIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE SYNTHESIS OF EXISTENCE."????
--------------------
MUEZZEN
MUSELEMAN
WHO CALLS FOR PRAYER FIVE TIMES A DAY.
VOYEUR--A NOSTALGIC SUFFERER."???
"EXISTENCE IN ITSELF IS IMPOSSIBLE LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE.
JUST DO THINGS YOU LIKE TO DO FOR DOING'S SAKE AND
ALSO TO UTILIZE TIME IN A BETTER WAY AND FORGET THE RESULTS." ???
" WHAT DID HE DO?
DANCED ALMOST NAKED WITH NAKED GAY MEN AND WOMEN
WHO ARE PART OF THE SEX INDUSTRY...PORNO STARS EVERY WHERE
IN THE WORLD. NOW HOW TOUGH IS THAT?
AND HOW CREATIVE?"???
"SUCCESS HAS DIFFERENT MEANING FOR DIFFERENT PEOPLE." ??
"SATURDAY, I WILL GO SEE A PLAY.
SUNDAY I WILL GO SEE A PLAY.
MONDAY. SOMETHING ELSE...MAYBE A MOVIE." BS
JANUARY IST: MAYBE TO BALTHAZAR FOR LUNCH." BS
"DISTRESS, PAIN AND SACRIFICE AND SWEAT, HE HAD
ENDURED TO SET HIM ON THE PATH OF RICHES." TITIAN
"CAPTURE THE COLOR AND ENERGY OF EVERY DAY LIFE." ??
------------------------
"IMPORTANT VISUAL POEMS
---------------------------------
OVID'S: METAMORPHOSES
TOO SUBTLE AN ARTIST TO SACRIFICE BEAUTY IN THE
METAPHORICAL DEPICTION OF A CURRENT EVENT" ???
"GORY TASK
"UNLITERARY."???
"ENTER MY BREAST AND BREATH THERE."???
"RARE ABILITY TO FUSE THE POLITICAL AND POETRY."???
"READ, "LIFE OF THE ARTIST"
BY
GIORGIO VASARI
"CLEAR LINES AND SCULPTURAL VOLUMES
OF FLORENTINE PAINTINGS FROM THE MORE FREELY DRAWN
COLOR DRIVEN CANVASES OF TITIAN OF VENICE."???
"APPLYING BLURED OUTLINES, APPLYING PAINT WITH
HIS FINGERS LAYERING COLOR FOR ATMOSPHERIC EFFECT."???
"PALETTE SO WARM, YOU CAN ALMOST FEEL IT'S HEAT."???
"HE STOOD APART FROM MORE CONTROLLED DESIGN CONSCIOUS
FLORENTINE EMBODIED BY MICHELANGELO'S MUSCULAR WOMEN
IN THE SISTINE CHAPEL."???
"MICHELANGELO PAINTED THE WORLD AS IT SHOULD BE,
TITIAN WITH HIS VENETIAN SPONTANEITY AND USE OF COLOR
GAVE US THE WORLD AS IS."???
------------------------------------
"MANHATTAN DAYS"
PROSE POEMS
BY
BINA SHARIF
Tuesday, March 31, 2020
OLD NOTEBOOKS CONTINUES
OLD NOTE BOOKS CONTINUES
--------------------------------
"IT'S NOT EASY TO ACCEPT THAT EVERY DAY LIFE
IS THE REAL LIFE." Tessa de loo
"DOES SHE NOT FEEL THE ENNUI OF ROUTINE?" Tessa de loo
--------------------
TIT BITS, GOING OUT TO EAT
I DON'T LIKE EATING OUT NOW
UNLESS UNLESS IT'S BALTHAZAR OR SOME OTHER PLACE LIKE THAT.
IN MOST OF THE RESTAURANTS, SERVICE IS AWFUL,
FOOD IS MOSTLY COLD, UNDERCOOKED OR OVERCOOKED.
WAITRESS ALWAYS HAVE AN ATTITUDE.
THE PLACE IS USUALLY DRAFTY
THEY GIVE YOU THE WORST TABLE NEAR THE BATHROOM
OR THE NOISY KITCHEN UNLESS THEY THINK THAT YOU ARE, "SOMEBODY."
THE FISH IS ALWAYS FARM FISH AND IT'S THE MOST PRICY, 30-36 DOLLARS
ONE TIME I ASKED A WAITRESS ABOUT THE FISH,
"EXUSE ME, IS THE FISH WILD OR FARM FISH?"
i SAID,
"OH! I REALLY DON'T KNOW, LET ME ASK THE MANAGER"
(She knew very well that it's not wild)
"OH! IT'S FARM FISH." SHE SAID
SO YOU EAT WILD FISH AT HOME, LESS PRICE FOR SURE
AND IN THE RESTAURANT YOU PAY $35 FOR THE FRAM FISH...
ISN'T THAT STUPID?
BUT WE STILL DO IT
AT LEAST SOME TIME
WE THE POOR PEOPLE
THE THE BILL
RICH PEOPLE EAT OUT ALL THE TIME.
MONEY IS NOT TH PROBLEM.
MODELS AND CELEBS GO TO TE FANCY PLACES NOT TO EAT
BUT TO PICK AND BE SEEN IN THEIR LATEST DESIGNER CLOTHES...
AND SOME ONE ELSE IS FOOTING THE BILL.
I GUESS WE SHOULD JUST STAY HOME
COOK AND CLEAN AND COOK AND CLEAN AGAIN
BUT WE DON'T THINK THAT IS OUR FUNCTION
BECAUSE WE DARE CALL OURSELVES, "ARTISTS"
"ARTISTS?" MY ASS...
ONLY CELEBS ARE THE ARTISTS...CELEBS WHO CAN NOT ACT,
CAN NOT WRITE AND CAN NOT PERFORM...
THEY ARE THE CELEBS...THEY DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING
A REAL ARTIST STRUGGLES FOR...
IN THIS CITY EVERY ONE IS AN ARTIST.
"WHAT DO YOU DO?"
"I AM AN ARTIST."
AND THAT'S HOW IT GOES.
THE REAL ARTISTS ARE POOR.
THEY CAN'T EAT OUT
AND THEY SHOULDN'T
SO WHAT SHOULD THEY DO ABOUT FOOD?
COOK
AND THEN?
EAT
AND THEN?
COOK AGAIN
AND THEN?
EAT AGAIN....
WHAT TIME SHOULD THEY DO THEIR ART?
OK, THEN, DO YOUR ART AND STARVE YOUR SELF
DO NOT COOK, DO NOT EAT,
STARVE YOURSELF...
DO YOUR ART...
HUNGRY ARTIST
THAT'S A NICE TITLE, "HUNGRY ARTIST" FOR YOUR NEW PERFORMANCE PIECE
"WHERE AM I PERFORMING?"
"I GOT AN IDEA FOR YOU."
"WHAT IDEA?"
"PERFORM IN YOUR KITCHEN WHILE YOU ARE COOKING AND SING ALONG,
"HUNGRY ARTIST...HUNGRY ARTIST." AND THAT WOULD BE SWELL
"SEE YOU CAN ACHIEVE TWO PURPOSES AT THE SAME TIME...
PERFORM AND COOK AND THEN FEED YOURSELF AND SAVE YOUR SCANTY
MONEY FROM GIVING IT TO THE RICH OWNERS OF THE LOUSY RESTAURANTS.
THE PASTA IN THE RESTAURANTS IS REALLY LOUSY.
FULL OF SALT, FULL OF SUGAR, COLD AND CREEPY.
SALADS ARE DROWNING IN BROWNISH, MUDDY LOOKING DRESSING...
GLASS OF WATER FULL OF ICE, HARDLY ANY WATER IN THE GLASS
ON AN ACY, SNOWY DAY OUTSIDE. MY TEETH CHATTER WITH FREEZING
ICY COLD WATER FOR HOURS AFTER WARDS.
THE COME STHE BILL. LOADS OF TAX AND TIP
AND TIP, DOUBLE THE TAX AND SOME MORE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE
SUDDENLY STABBED BY THE LOOKS OF THE ANGRY WAITRESS
AND THEN COME HOME DEPRESSED BECAUSE NO YOU HAVE NO MORE MONEY FOR
THE COFFEE NEXT MORNING.
NOW YOU ARE AT HOME AND YOU ARE ANGRY, UNSATISFIED,
BLOATED, YOUR BP GOING UP AND UP WITH SALT AND YOU ARE POORER THAN
BEFORE.
--------------------------------
"IT'S NOT EASY TO ACCEPT THAT EVERY DAY LIFE
IS THE REAL LIFE." Tessa de loo
"DOES SHE NOT FEEL THE ENNUI OF ROUTINE?" Tessa de loo
--------------------
TIT BITS, GOING OUT TO EAT
I DON'T LIKE EATING OUT NOW
UNLESS UNLESS IT'S BALTHAZAR OR SOME OTHER PLACE LIKE THAT.
IN MOST OF THE RESTAURANTS, SERVICE IS AWFUL,
FOOD IS MOSTLY COLD, UNDERCOOKED OR OVERCOOKED.
WAITRESS ALWAYS HAVE AN ATTITUDE.
THE PLACE IS USUALLY DRAFTY
THEY GIVE YOU THE WORST TABLE NEAR THE BATHROOM
OR THE NOISY KITCHEN UNLESS THEY THINK THAT YOU ARE, "SOMEBODY."
THE FISH IS ALWAYS FARM FISH AND IT'S THE MOST PRICY, 30-36 DOLLARS
ONE TIME I ASKED A WAITRESS ABOUT THE FISH,
"EXUSE ME, IS THE FISH WILD OR FARM FISH?"
i SAID,
"OH! I REALLY DON'T KNOW, LET ME ASK THE MANAGER"
(She knew very well that it's not wild)
"OH! IT'S FARM FISH." SHE SAID
SO YOU EAT WILD FISH AT HOME, LESS PRICE FOR SURE
AND IN THE RESTAURANT YOU PAY $35 FOR THE FRAM FISH...
ISN'T THAT STUPID?
BUT WE STILL DO IT
AT LEAST SOME TIME
WE THE POOR PEOPLE
THE THE BILL
RICH PEOPLE EAT OUT ALL THE TIME.
MONEY IS NOT TH PROBLEM.
MODELS AND CELEBS GO TO TE FANCY PLACES NOT TO EAT
BUT TO PICK AND BE SEEN IN THEIR LATEST DESIGNER CLOTHES...
AND SOME ONE ELSE IS FOOTING THE BILL.
I GUESS WE SHOULD JUST STAY HOME
COOK AND CLEAN AND COOK AND CLEAN AGAIN
BUT WE DON'T THINK THAT IS OUR FUNCTION
BECAUSE WE DARE CALL OURSELVES, "ARTISTS"
"ARTISTS?" MY ASS...
ONLY CELEBS ARE THE ARTISTS...CELEBS WHO CAN NOT ACT,
CAN NOT WRITE AND CAN NOT PERFORM...
THEY ARE THE CELEBS...THEY DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING
A REAL ARTIST STRUGGLES FOR...
IN THIS CITY EVERY ONE IS AN ARTIST.
"WHAT DO YOU DO?"
"I AM AN ARTIST."
AND THAT'S HOW IT GOES.
THE REAL ARTISTS ARE POOR.
THEY CAN'T EAT OUT
AND THEY SHOULDN'T
SO WHAT SHOULD THEY DO ABOUT FOOD?
COOK
AND THEN?
EAT
AND THEN?
COOK AGAIN
AND THEN?
EAT AGAIN....
WHAT TIME SHOULD THEY DO THEIR ART?
OK, THEN, DO YOUR ART AND STARVE YOUR SELF
DO NOT COOK, DO NOT EAT,
STARVE YOURSELF...
DO YOUR ART...
HUNGRY ARTIST
THAT'S A NICE TITLE, "HUNGRY ARTIST" FOR YOUR NEW PERFORMANCE PIECE
"WHERE AM I PERFORMING?"
"I GOT AN IDEA FOR YOU."
"WHAT IDEA?"
"PERFORM IN YOUR KITCHEN WHILE YOU ARE COOKING AND SING ALONG,
"HUNGRY ARTIST...HUNGRY ARTIST." AND THAT WOULD BE SWELL
"SEE YOU CAN ACHIEVE TWO PURPOSES AT THE SAME TIME...
PERFORM AND COOK AND THEN FEED YOURSELF AND SAVE YOUR SCANTY
MONEY FROM GIVING IT TO THE RICH OWNERS OF THE LOUSY RESTAURANTS.
THE PASTA IN THE RESTAURANTS IS REALLY LOUSY.
FULL OF SALT, FULL OF SUGAR, COLD AND CREEPY.
SALADS ARE DROWNING IN BROWNISH, MUDDY LOOKING DRESSING...
GLASS OF WATER FULL OF ICE, HARDLY ANY WATER IN THE GLASS
ON AN ACY, SNOWY DAY OUTSIDE. MY TEETH CHATTER WITH FREEZING
ICY COLD WATER FOR HOURS AFTER WARDS.
THE COME STHE BILL. LOADS OF TAX AND TIP
AND TIP, DOUBLE THE TAX AND SOME MORE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE
SUDDENLY STABBED BY THE LOOKS OF THE ANGRY WAITRESS
AND THEN COME HOME DEPRESSED BECAUSE NO YOU HAVE NO MORE MONEY FOR
THE COFFEE NEXT MORNING.
NOW YOU ARE AT HOME AND YOU ARE ANGRY, UNSATISFIED,
BLOATED, YOUR BP GOING UP AND UP WITH SALT AND YOU ARE POORER THAN
BEFORE.
OLD NOTEBOOKS OF BINA SHARIF CONTINUES
OLD NOTE BOOKS OF BINA SHARIF CONTINUES
--------------------------------------------------------------------
"DELIVER A BLOW AT ALL OF THEM
WITH YOUR LAUGHTER." Annonymous
------------------------------------------------------
MY FAVORITE WRITERS
PINTER
BECKETT
GOGOL
DOSTOEYSKY
CHEKHOV
TENNESSEE
BAUDELAIR
BALZAC
MUSPASSANT
IONESCO
SHAESPEARE
PIRANDELLO
RIMBAUD
BERNARD SHAW
DIDION
JAMES BALDWIN
YEATS
OSCAR WILDE
JAMES JOYCE
KEATS
EDGAR ALLEN POE
---------------------------------
"LAUGHTER GOT REPLACED BY
NOSTALGIC SADNESS" Anonymous
"THE SERVANT ARRIVES WHEN THE MASTER CALLS." Anonymous
----------------------------------------------------------------
KARIMA, A NEW YORKER
--------------
IT WILL BE ALL OVER ON SUNDAY.
I HAVE FAILED IN DEALING WITH ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE.
I WANT TO STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLE RIGHT NOW
I DON'T WANT TO UNDERSTAND THEM
I TRIED,
I FAILED.
I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH THEM IN ANY WHICH WAY RIGHT NOW
I FIND THEM VERY VERY DANGEROUS RIGHT NOW
IN THEIR SMILING SLY REMARKS
THEY THINK YOU ARE STUPID WHEN THEY MAKE THOSE SNARKY REMARKS
THEY ARE NOT GOOD FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH RIGHT NOW
I NEED TO PRESERVE MY PSYCHE
MY ENERGY
AND MY CREATIVITY.
THEY ARE FOR SURE CRUCIAL TO MY CREATIVITY
SOME OF THEM AT LEAST
I KNOW TWO OR THREE NICE PEOPLE
THAT'S ALL
AND THERE ARE MILLIONS
WHAT A SHAME
I TRIED
TO BE NICE, KIND, GIVING, COMPASSIONATE
I FAILED
MAYBE SOME OF MY OWN WEAKNESS
THEY ARE HATEFUL TOWARDS ME
THEY ARE REALLY DESTRUCTIVE TOWARDS ME
THEY MAKE A REMARK IN PASSING
AND IT DISTURBS ME FOR MONTHS
I MUST BE A REAL THIN SKINNED PERSON
NOT A NEW YORKER
NO, NOT IN THE LEAST
THIUGH THIS IS THE ONLY PLACE I HAVE LIVED FOR SO LONG
DIDN'T LEARN THE TOUGHNESS OF NEW YORKER
THAT'S A COMPLIMENT
I WISH I WAS TOUGH,
RESILIENT,
AGGRESSIVE,
AMBITIOUS,
A CUT THROAT PERSON.
WHAT'S THE POINT OF LIVING IN NY IF YOU DON'T HAVE THOSE
QUALITIES WHICH LEAD TOWARDS SUCCESS
SUCCESS AT ANY COST
"I WILL KILL MY MOTHER TO GET AHEAD IF SHE WAS IN MY WAY."
THEY SAY
I AM SURE THEY DON'T MEAN IT
NO ONE IS GOING TO KILL THEIR MOTHERS TO GET AHEAD
BUT THIS SAYING SAYS IT ALL.
IT'S THE TOUGH DETERMINATION TO MAKE IT.
WHY LIVE IN NY OTHERWISE?
BUT MOST OF THE PEOPLE I HAVE ENCOUNTERED
OVER THE YEARS ARE How are you?TEFUL,
MEAN,
UNTHANKFUL,
SHAMELESS,
HORRENDOUS IN THEIR RACISM
IN THEIR PREJUDICE
PROVOKTIVE,
MISERABLY SUPERIOR, (THEY THINK)
JUST MEAN BASTARDS
I HAVE DECIDED TO BE ALONE
ESPECIALLY AFTER SEPT 11
JUST BE ALONE
READ BOOKS
PAINT
BE ALONE
BE SAD
MISS HOME
CRY
REGRET
LAUGH
CRY AGAIN
BUT BE ALONE RIGHT NOW
DO NOT RUN INTO PEOPLE
ALL THEY How are you?VE TO SAY IS, " YOUR COUNTRY IS FULL OF TERRORISTS."
"WHICH COUNTRY"?
I ASK
"YOUR COUNTRY."
THEY SAY
"THIS IS MY COUNTRY, USA, NEW YORK."
I SAY
"NO, I MEAN YOUR REAL COUNTRY, THE COUNTRY YOU CAME FROM, THE COUNTRY
WHICH IS FULL OF EVEIL PEOPLE, TERRORISTS, TERRORIST RELIGION THEY
PRACTICE, THEY SAY ALLH-HO-AKBAR BEFORE THEY KILL."
I HAVE DECIDED NOT TO GO OUT.
I MUST NOT GO OUT
THEY STOPP ME AT EVERY STREET CORNER AND SAY THESE AWFUL THINGS.
I MUST NOT GO OUT AT ALL.
JUST EXERCISE AT HOME
TAKE CARE OF YOUR DIET
YOUR HEALTH
JUST BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A FAMINE OUTSIDE
AND YOU MUST NOT GO OUT AT ALL
DANGEROUS FOR YOUR WELL BEING....
TAKE WALKS IN UN-KNOWN NEIGHBORHOODS
WHERE NO ONE KNOWS YOU...
BE POLITE WITH EVERY ONE EVEN IF THEY SAY NASTY THINGS ABOUT YOU
BE POLITE
WALK AWAY
SAY, TANKS AND WALK AWAY...
DO NOT TAKE IT TO HEART
DO NOT WASTE YOUR TALENT
YOUR EMOTIONS
YOUR SENSITIVITY
YOUR KINDNESS OF THE HEART,
YOUR SOPHISTICATION
FOR NOTHING.
THOSE KIND OF PEOPLE MEANS NOTHING TO YOU
THEIR REMARKS MEANS NOTHING TO YOU.
BE ABOVE IT
LET IT GO
MEDITATE
PRAY.
NOTHING AND NONE OF THEM ARE WORTH YOUR TIME
SAVE IT FOR YOURSELF
READ POETRY
YOU HAVE GREAT BOOKS
YOU LOVE TO READ KARIMA
DON'T YOU
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU LOVE TO READ
YOU TOLD ME, ALL THOSE WRITERS ARE YOUR BEST FRIENDS
YOU HAVE COMPANIONSHIP OF ALL THE DEAD WRITERS
AND THEY WERE THE REALL WRITERS
NO JOKE ABOUT IT
THEIR POEMS STAYS IN THE DEPTH OF YOUR SOUL
THAT SHOULD GIVE YOU STRENGTH.
THAT SHOULD GIVE YOU,
JOY,
PAIN,
SORROW,
AMUSEMENT,
LIFE'S REALITIES,
LIFE'S TRUTHS AND IT'S FALSEHOOD
BRAVERY,
COURAGE,
STRUGGLE
PERSEVERANCE
WILL POWER
HARD WORK,
CAUSE TO LIVE
INSPIRATION TO LIVE
LONGING TO LIVE
DEDICATION
DEDICATION FOR A CAUSE
WILL TO LIVE,
WILL TO ACHIEVE
APPRECIATION OF BEAUTY
APPRECIATION OF TIME,
APPRECIATION OF JOY
APPRECIATION OF LOVE,
APPRECIATION OF TIME,
APPRECIATION OF DEATH EVEN.....
SEE KARIMA, YOU HAVE TONS
OF FRIENDS, DEAD FRIENDS
THEY ARE WILLING TO TALK TO YOU,
LAUGH WITH YOU,
CRY WITH YOU,
AMUSE YOU,
MAKE YOU THINK,
MKE YOU AWARE OF THINGS YOU DID NOT KNOW,
MAKE YOU AWARE OF WHAT'S GOING TO COME...
SAVE YOUR STRENGTH FOR THEM
SO YOU CAN LEARN FROM THEM
SAVE YOUR CREATIVITY FOR THEM, YOUR KNOWLEDGE
YOUR PSYCHOLOGY,
YOUR SENSE OF ANALYSIS,
YOUR ABILITY TO LEARN
ABILITY TO ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE FROM THEM...
GATHER STRENGTH TO LEARN FROM THEM
PRESERVE YOUR SENSES TO LEARN FROM THEM
TIME IS ALWAYS SHORT LIKE LIFE
USE YOUR TIME WISELY...
IT'S QUITE LATE ALREADY
AND GETTING LATER AND LATER
SAVE YOUR SELF SWEETHEART
SAVE YOUR SELF DEAR KARIMA
SAVE YOUR SELF...............
--------------------------------------------------------------------
"DELIVER A BLOW AT ALL OF THEM
WITH YOUR LAUGHTER." Annonymous
------------------------------------------------------
MY FAVORITE WRITERS
PINTER
BECKETT
GOGOL
DOSTOEYSKY
CHEKHOV
TENNESSEE
BAUDELAIR
BALZAC
MUSPASSANT
IONESCO
SHAESPEARE
PIRANDELLO
RIMBAUD
BERNARD SHAW
DIDION
JAMES BALDWIN
YEATS
OSCAR WILDE
JAMES JOYCE
KEATS
EDGAR ALLEN POE
---------------------------------
"LAUGHTER GOT REPLACED BY
NOSTALGIC SADNESS" Anonymous
"THE SERVANT ARRIVES WHEN THE MASTER CALLS." Anonymous
----------------------------------------------------------------
KARIMA, A NEW YORKER
--------------
IT WILL BE ALL OVER ON SUNDAY.
I HAVE FAILED IN DEALING WITH ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE.
I WANT TO STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLE RIGHT NOW
I DON'T WANT TO UNDERSTAND THEM
I TRIED,
I FAILED.
I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH THEM IN ANY WHICH WAY RIGHT NOW
I FIND THEM VERY VERY DANGEROUS RIGHT NOW
IN THEIR SMILING SLY REMARKS
THEY THINK YOU ARE STUPID WHEN THEY MAKE THOSE SNARKY REMARKS
THEY ARE NOT GOOD FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH RIGHT NOW
I NEED TO PRESERVE MY PSYCHE
MY ENERGY
AND MY CREATIVITY.
THEY ARE FOR SURE CRUCIAL TO MY CREATIVITY
SOME OF THEM AT LEAST
I KNOW TWO OR THREE NICE PEOPLE
THAT'S ALL
AND THERE ARE MILLIONS
WHAT A SHAME
I TRIED
TO BE NICE, KIND, GIVING, COMPASSIONATE
I FAILED
MAYBE SOME OF MY OWN WEAKNESS
THEY ARE HATEFUL TOWARDS ME
THEY ARE REALLY DESTRUCTIVE TOWARDS ME
THEY MAKE A REMARK IN PASSING
AND IT DISTURBS ME FOR MONTHS
I MUST BE A REAL THIN SKINNED PERSON
NOT A NEW YORKER
NO, NOT IN THE LEAST
THIUGH THIS IS THE ONLY PLACE I HAVE LIVED FOR SO LONG
DIDN'T LEARN THE TOUGHNESS OF NEW YORKER
THAT'S A COMPLIMENT
I WISH I WAS TOUGH,
RESILIENT,
AGGRESSIVE,
AMBITIOUS,
A CUT THROAT PERSON.
WHAT'S THE POINT OF LIVING IN NY IF YOU DON'T HAVE THOSE
QUALITIES WHICH LEAD TOWARDS SUCCESS
SUCCESS AT ANY COST
"I WILL KILL MY MOTHER TO GET AHEAD IF SHE WAS IN MY WAY."
THEY SAY
I AM SURE THEY DON'T MEAN IT
NO ONE IS GOING TO KILL THEIR MOTHERS TO GET AHEAD
BUT THIS SAYING SAYS IT ALL.
IT'S THE TOUGH DETERMINATION TO MAKE IT.
WHY LIVE IN NY OTHERWISE?
BUT MOST OF THE PEOPLE I HAVE ENCOUNTERED
OVER THE YEARS ARE How are you?TEFUL,
MEAN,
UNTHANKFUL,
SHAMELESS,
HORRENDOUS IN THEIR RACISM
IN THEIR PREJUDICE
PROVOKTIVE,
MISERABLY SUPERIOR, (THEY THINK)
JUST MEAN BASTARDS
I HAVE DECIDED TO BE ALONE
ESPECIALLY AFTER SEPT 11
JUST BE ALONE
READ BOOKS
PAINT
BE ALONE
BE SAD
MISS HOME
CRY
REGRET
LAUGH
CRY AGAIN
BUT BE ALONE RIGHT NOW
DO NOT RUN INTO PEOPLE
ALL THEY How are you?VE TO SAY IS, " YOUR COUNTRY IS FULL OF TERRORISTS."
"WHICH COUNTRY"?
I ASK
"YOUR COUNTRY."
THEY SAY
"THIS IS MY COUNTRY, USA, NEW YORK."
I SAY
"NO, I MEAN YOUR REAL COUNTRY, THE COUNTRY YOU CAME FROM, THE COUNTRY
WHICH IS FULL OF EVEIL PEOPLE, TERRORISTS, TERRORIST RELIGION THEY
PRACTICE, THEY SAY ALLH-HO-AKBAR BEFORE THEY KILL."
I HAVE DECIDED NOT TO GO OUT.
I MUST NOT GO OUT
THEY STOPP ME AT EVERY STREET CORNER AND SAY THESE AWFUL THINGS.
I MUST NOT GO OUT AT ALL.
JUST EXERCISE AT HOME
TAKE CARE OF YOUR DIET
YOUR HEALTH
JUST BELIEVE THAT THERE IS A FAMINE OUTSIDE
AND YOU MUST NOT GO OUT AT ALL
DANGEROUS FOR YOUR WELL BEING....
TAKE WALKS IN UN-KNOWN NEIGHBORHOODS
WHERE NO ONE KNOWS YOU...
BE POLITE WITH EVERY ONE EVEN IF THEY SAY NASTY THINGS ABOUT YOU
BE POLITE
WALK AWAY
SAY, TANKS AND WALK AWAY...
DO NOT TAKE IT TO HEART
DO NOT WASTE YOUR TALENT
YOUR EMOTIONS
YOUR SENSITIVITY
YOUR KINDNESS OF THE HEART,
YOUR SOPHISTICATION
FOR NOTHING.
THOSE KIND OF PEOPLE MEANS NOTHING TO YOU
THEIR REMARKS MEANS NOTHING TO YOU.
BE ABOVE IT
LET IT GO
MEDITATE
PRAY.
NOTHING AND NONE OF THEM ARE WORTH YOUR TIME
SAVE IT FOR YOURSELF
READ POETRY
YOU HAVE GREAT BOOKS
YOU LOVE TO READ KARIMA
DON'T YOU
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU LOVE TO READ
YOU TOLD ME, ALL THOSE WRITERS ARE YOUR BEST FRIENDS
YOU HAVE COMPANIONSHIP OF ALL THE DEAD WRITERS
AND THEY WERE THE REALL WRITERS
NO JOKE ABOUT IT
THEIR POEMS STAYS IN THE DEPTH OF YOUR SOUL
THAT SHOULD GIVE YOU STRENGTH.
THAT SHOULD GIVE YOU,
JOY,
PAIN,
SORROW,
AMUSEMENT,
LIFE'S REALITIES,
LIFE'S TRUTHS AND IT'S FALSEHOOD
BRAVERY,
COURAGE,
STRUGGLE
PERSEVERANCE
WILL POWER
HARD WORK,
CAUSE TO LIVE
INSPIRATION TO LIVE
LONGING TO LIVE
DEDICATION
DEDICATION FOR A CAUSE
WILL TO LIVE,
WILL TO ACHIEVE
APPRECIATION OF BEAUTY
APPRECIATION OF TIME,
APPRECIATION OF JOY
APPRECIATION OF LOVE,
APPRECIATION OF TIME,
APPRECIATION OF DEATH EVEN.....
SEE KARIMA, YOU HAVE TONS
OF FRIENDS, DEAD FRIENDS
THEY ARE WILLING TO TALK TO YOU,
LAUGH WITH YOU,
CRY WITH YOU,
AMUSE YOU,
MAKE YOU THINK,
MKE YOU AWARE OF THINGS YOU DID NOT KNOW,
MAKE YOU AWARE OF WHAT'S GOING TO COME...
SAVE YOUR STRENGTH FOR THEM
SO YOU CAN LEARN FROM THEM
SAVE YOUR CREATIVITY FOR THEM, YOUR KNOWLEDGE
YOUR PSYCHOLOGY,
YOUR SENSE OF ANALYSIS,
YOUR ABILITY TO LEARN
ABILITY TO ACQUIRE KNOWLEDGE FROM THEM...
GATHER STRENGTH TO LEARN FROM THEM
PRESERVE YOUR SENSES TO LEARN FROM THEM
TIME IS ALWAYS SHORT LIKE LIFE
USE YOUR TIME WISELY...
IT'S QUITE LATE ALREADY
AND GETTING LATER AND LATER
SAVE YOUR SELF SWEETHEART
SAVE YOUR SELF DEAR KARIMA
SAVE YOUR SELF...............
Saturday, March 28, 2020
OLD NOTE BOOKS. LET'S SEE WHAT'S IN THEM. NOTEBOOK 2012
OLD NOTE BOOKS. LET'S SEE WHAT'S IN THEM. NOTE BOOK 2012
ANOTHER MISTAKE.
SHOULD I HAVE KEPT HIM?
OR LET HIM GO?
THERE WERE SIGNS THAT HE WILL BE TROUBLE
WHAT DID I DO?
KEPT HIM...
RESULT...
DISASTER...
CAN'T DESCRIBE THE TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE.
LET IT GO...
EASY SAID THEN DONE...
TOO LATE..
HUGE LOSS?
HOPE NOT
GO WITH YOUR INSTINCTS NEXT TIME
LISTEN TO YOUR SENSES
TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS
THE PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES
NO ONE GOOD IS AVAILABLE
THOSE ARE THE SIGNS
BUT NOW TRY TO LET IT GO...
I SHALL TRY...
___________________________________
DIFFICULTIES OF DOING PLAYS UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES
NO ONE GOOD IS AVAILABLE TO WORK FOR NO MONEY
THEATER HAS NO MONEY
I HAVE NO MONEY
NON PROFIT OUTFiT
WHAT DO i DO?
HIRE MEDIOCRITY
AND THEN/
THEY JUMP ON MY HEAD AND DANCE
THE WORD PROFESSIONAL DOESN'T EXIST UNTILL YOU PAY THEM
WHO SHOULD PAY THEM?
THE PRODUCER
THE PRODUCER SAYS, "THEY HAVE NO MONEY"
YOU WANT TO DO YOUR PLAY, YOU FIGURE IT OUT
TAKE THE ABUSE....
I DO...
I TAKE THE ABUSE
I HATE MYSELF
I STILL DO MY PLAYS
I KEEP TAKING THE ABUSE
I KEEP HURTING MYSELF
STOP WRITING ABOUT IT
IT'S MAKING ME VERY DEPRESSED...
I HAVE ALOT OF DISTRESS
I AM GOIN TO STOP WRITING ABOUT IT
IT'S MAKING ME VERY VERY DEPRESSED.
-----------------------------------------------------------
STOP DOING THE PLAYS WITH OTHER ACTORS
DO A ONE WOMAN SHOW
THAT'S IT
THAT'S THE ANSWER
CUT OUT THE HEART ACHE...
LOOK FOR WORK AS AN ACTOR IN OTHER PEOPLE'S PLAYS
DO ONLY PAYING JOBS
GO BACK TO DOING MOVIES
COMMERCIALS
TV
MAXIMUM TWO CHARACTER PLAYS WITH K...
DEVELOP CULTURAL BLOG
GO OUT TO THE THEATER, SEE OTHER PEOPLE'S PLAYS
ENJOY YOURSELF
CUT OUT THE HEART ACHE
EXERCISE
GYM?
THAT'S A QUESTION MARK
I HATE GYM
LONG WALKS
LONG, LONG WALKS ON THE COUNTRY ROADS
COUNTRY ROADS LINED WITH TALL TREES
BY THE SEA SIDE...
ARE YOU DREAMING?
YOU LIVE IN THE EAST VILLAGE,
WITH HOMELESS AND RATS
BUT THERE IS THE EAST RIVER...
WALK ON THE CEMENT PATHWAY NEXT TO THE RAILING
OVERLOOKING THE RIVER...
IMAGINE THAT YOU ARE ON A COUNTRY ROAD NEXT TO THE SEA.
IMAGINE...
KEEP IMAGINING...
THANK GOD THAT YOU HAVE IMAGINATION
DO YOU HAVE IMAGINATION?
YOU THINK YOU DO
YOU ARE AN ARTIST, ARN'T YOU?
AT LEAST YOU SAY THAT YOU ARE
AN ARTIST
PROVE IT...
HAVE AN IMAGINATION.
DO EVERYTHING BASED ON THAT FERTILE
IMAGINATION....
TRAVEL WITH IT
GO TO LONDON
GO TO TURKEY
GO TO BARCELONA
GO TO LISBON
GO TO MARAKESH
SEE HOW MANY COUNTRIES YOU CAN GO TO
JUST WITH YOUR IMAGINATION?
YOU ARE LUCKY THAT YOU ARE AN ARTIST...
GOOD ACTORS OR NONE...
MONEY OR NO MONEY...
FAME OR NO FAME
COMMERCE OR NO COMMERCE
YOUR AMAZING IMAGINATION IS YOUR COMMERCE...
HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE IT?
NOT MANY
FORGET ABOUT THEATER
FORGET ABOUT PLAYS
JUST GO AWAY
TO EXOTIC LANDS
MANY, MANY EXOTIC LANDS
FULL OF FLOWERS,
FULL OF BLOSSOMING TREES,
FULL OF BAZARS
FULL OF SPICE
FULL OF STRANGERS
IT'S SO WONDERFUL TO BE AMONGST STRANGERS
YOU MUST BE USED TO IT
YOU HAVE BEEN AMONGST STRANGERS FOR SO LONG
THE COUNTRY YOU LIVE IN...
IS NOT YOUR COUNTRY...
YOU ARE AMONGST STRANGERS...
YOU ARE ALREADY TRAVELING
YOU ARE ALREADY IN EXOTIC LANDS.
DON'T THINK OF PDF
I HATE THE WORD PDF
YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT PDF
YOU ARE NOT A PLAYWRIGHT ANY LONGER
YOU ARE AN EXOTIC TRAVELLER.
....................................................................
DURING YOUR TRAVELS
------------------------------------
MUSEUMS
THEATER
PARKS
WINDOW SHOPPING
KEEP BUSY
NO ACCESSABILITY TO MORONS
BE A CELEB...
RESEVE
POLITE
DISTANT
READ
READ PLAYS
SHEKSPEARE
PINTER
CHEKOV
BERNARD SHAW
MOLIER
AUGUST WILSON
READ BOOKS
CAMUS
BOUDELAIRE
JAMES BALDWIN
ANDRE GIDE
DR SAMUEL JHONSON
RIMBAUD
YEATS
EDGAR ALLEN POE
FLAUBERT
EMERSON
TENNESSEE WILLIAMS
DOSTOVESKY
GOGOL
TURGENIEV
-----------------------------------
CHEKOVIAN DESPAIR
SHRINKING ASPIRATIONS
MISSED CONNECTIONS
BOTTOMLESS HUNGER
CLARITY IN CHEKHOV'S AMBIGUITY
COMIC AND TRAGIC AT ONCE
ILLUMINATING FIERCENESS?
FUTILE ATTEMPTS TO COMMUNICATE
--------------------------------------------------------
"OUTSIDER"
------------------
WE DON'T HAVE STRONG SENSE OF PROPORTIONS
MANY TIMES WE SEE OURSELVES WITH OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES,
AND OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES ONLY.
AND OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES SEE US AS OUTSIDERS, AS FOREIGNERS,
IMMIGRANTS FROM POOR COUNTRIES WHO MUST BE INFERIOR--TO
BE TAMED AND TREATED AS SUBSERVIENT.
THE SADDEST THING IS THAT WE NEVER EVER WANT TO SEE
OURSELVES THAT WAY BUT WHEN WE CATCH OURSELVES WITH THAT VISION
WE WANT TO RUN AWAY FROM OURSELVES AND FROM OTHERS AND
EVENTUALLY BECOME, "OUTSIDERS" EVEN TO OURSELVES.
THEY WANTED US TO BE THAT WAY.
THEN WE ISOLATE OURSELVES AND WASTE ALL THAT CREATIVE ENERGY FIGHTING
ANOTHER MISTAKE.
SHOULD I HAVE KEPT HIM?
OR LET HIM GO?
THERE WERE SIGNS THAT HE WILL BE TROUBLE
WHAT DID I DO?
KEPT HIM...
RESULT...
DISASTER...
CAN'T DESCRIBE THE TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE.
LET IT GO...
EASY SAID THEN DONE...
TOO LATE..
HUGE LOSS?
HOPE NOT
GO WITH YOUR INSTINCTS NEXT TIME
LISTEN TO YOUR SENSES
TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS
THE PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES
NO ONE GOOD IS AVAILABLE
THOSE ARE THE SIGNS
BUT NOW TRY TO LET IT GO...
I SHALL TRY...
___________________________________
DIFFICULTIES OF DOING PLAYS UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES
NO ONE GOOD IS AVAILABLE TO WORK FOR NO MONEY
THEATER HAS NO MONEY
I HAVE NO MONEY
NON PROFIT OUTFiT
WHAT DO i DO?
HIRE MEDIOCRITY
AND THEN/
THEY JUMP ON MY HEAD AND DANCE
THE WORD PROFESSIONAL DOESN'T EXIST UNTILL YOU PAY THEM
WHO SHOULD PAY THEM?
THE PRODUCER
THE PRODUCER SAYS, "THEY HAVE NO MONEY"
YOU WANT TO DO YOUR PLAY, YOU FIGURE IT OUT
TAKE THE ABUSE....
I DO...
I TAKE THE ABUSE
I HATE MYSELF
I STILL DO MY PLAYS
I KEEP TAKING THE ABUSE
I KEEP HURTING MYSELF
STOP WRITING ABOUT IT
IT'S MAKING ME VERY DEPRESSED...
I HAVE ALOT OF DISTRESS
I AM GOIN TO STOP WRITING ABOUT IT
IT'S MAKING ME VERY VERY DEPRESSED.
-----------------------------------------------------------
STOP DOING THE PLAYS WITH OTHER ACTORS
DO A ONE WOMAN SHOW
THAT'S IT
THAT'S THE ANSWER
CUT OUT THE HEART ACHE...
LOOK FOR WORK AS AN ACTOR IN OTHER PEOPLE'S PLAYS
DO ONLY PAYING JOBS
GO BACK TO DOING MOVIES
COMMERCIALS
TV
MAXIMUM TWO CHARACTER PLAYS WITH K...
DEVELOP CULTURAL BLOG
GO OUT TO THE THEATER, SEE OTHER PEOPLE'S PLAYS
ENJOY YOURSELF
CUT OUT THE HEART ACHE
EXERCISE
GYM?
THAT'S A QUESTION MARK
I HATE GYM
LONG WALKS
LONG, LONG WALKS ON THE COUNTRY ROADS
COUNTRY ROADS LINED WITH TALL TREES
BY THE SEA SIDE...
ARE YOU DREAMING?
YOU LIVE IN THE EAST VILLAGE,
WITH HOMELESS AND RATS
BUT THERE IS THE EAST RIVER...
WALK ON THE CEMENT PATHWAY NEXT TO THE RAILING
OVERLOOKING THE RIVER...
IMAGINE THAT YOU ARE ON A COUNTRY ROAD NEXT TO THE SEA.
IMAGINE...
KEEP IMAGINING...
THANK GOD THAT YOU HAVE IMAGINATION
DO YOU HAVE IMAGINATION?
YOU THINK YOU DO
YOU ARE AN ARTIST, ARN'T YOU?
AT LEAST YOU SAY THAT YOU ARE
AN ARTIST
PROVE IT...
HAVE AN IMAGINATION.
DO EVERYTHING BASED ON THAT FERTILE
IMAGINATION....
TRAVEL WITH IT
GO TO LONDON
GO TO TURKEY
GO TO BARCELONA
GO TO LISBON
GO TO MARAKESH
SEE HOW MANY COUNTRIES YOU CAN GO TO
JUST WITH YOUR IMAGINATION?
YOU ARE LUCKY THAT YOU ARE AN ARTIST...
GOOD ACTORS OR NONE...
MONEY OR NO MONEY...
FAME OR NO FAME
COMMERCE OR NO COMMERCE
YOUR AMAZING IMAGINATION IS YOUR COMMERCE...
HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE IT?
NOT MANY
FORGET ABOUT THEATER
FORGET ABOUT PLAYS
JUST GO AWAY
TO EXOTIC LANDS
MANY, MANY EXOTIC LANDS
FULL OF FLOWERS,
FULL OF BLOSSOMING TREES,
FULL OF BAZARS
FULL OF SPICE
FULL OF STRANGERS
IT'S SO WONDERFUL TO BE AMONGST STRANGERS
YOU MUST BE USED TO IT
YOU HAVE BEEN AMONGST STRANGERS FOR SO LONG
THE COUNTRY YOU LIVE IN...
IS NOT YOUR COUNTRY...
YOU ARE AMONGST STRANGERS...
YOU ARE ALREADY TRAVELING
YOU ARE ALREADY IN EXOTIC LANDS.
DON'T THINK OF PDF
I HATE THE WORD PDF
YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT PDF
YOU ARE NOT A PLAYWRIGHT ANY LONGER
YOU ARE AN EXOTIC TRAVELLER.
....................................................................
DURING YOUR TRAVELS
------------------------------------
MUSEUMS
THEATER
PARKS
WINDOW SHOPPING
KEEP BUSY
NO ACCESSABILITY TO MORONS
BE A CELEB...
RESEVE
POLITE
DISTANT
READ
READ PLAYS
SHEKSPEARE
PINTER
CHEKOV
BERNARD SHAW
MOLIER
AUGUST WILSON
READ BOOKS
CAMUS
BOUDELAIRE
JAMES BALDWIN
ANDRE GIDE
DR SAMUEL JHONSON
RIMBAUD
YEATS
EDGAR ALLEN POE
FLAUBERT
EMERSON
TENNESSEE WILLIAMS
DOSTOVESKY
GOGOL
TURGENIEV
-----------------------------------
CHEKOVIAN DESPAIR
SHRINKING ASPIRATIONS
MISSED CONNECTIONS
BOTTOMLESS HUNGER
CLARITY IN CHEKHOV'S AMBIGUITY
COMIC AND TRAGIC AT ONCE
ILLUMINATING FIERCENESS?
FUTILE ATTEMPTS TO COMMUNICATE
--------------------------------------------------------
"OUTSIDER"
------------------
WE DON'T HAVE STRONG SENSE OF PROPORTIONS
MANY TIMES WE SEE OURSELVES WITH OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES,
AND OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES ONLY.
AND OTHER PEOPLE'S EYES SEE US AS OUTSIDERS, AS FOREIGNERS,
IMMIGRANTS FROM POOR COUNTRIES WHO MUST BE INFERIOR--TO
BE TAMED AND TREATED AS SUBSERVIENT.
THE SADDEST THING IS THAT WE NEVER EVER WANT TO SEE
OURSELVES THAT WAY BUT WHEN WE CATCH OURSELVES WITH THAT VISION
WE WANT TO RUN AWAY FROM OURSELVES AND FROM OTHERS AND
EVENTUALLY BECOME, "OUTSIDERS" EVEN TO OURSELVES.
THEY WANTED US TO BE THAT WAY.
THEN WE ISOLATE OURSELVES AND WASTE ALL THAT CREATIVE ENERGY FIGHTING
THE...
THE FIGHT WITH OURSELVES NOT TO FEEL WHAT WE ARE MADE TO FEEL,
WHAT WE ARE FORCED TO FEEL.
UNDOING WHAT'S BEEN DONE TO US IS MONUMENTAL EFFORT
AND WE ARE EXHAUSTED TO GO OUT AND FIGHT AND TRY TO TAKE
THIS FALSE, ASSUMED TRAGIC REALITY OUT OF OUR LIVES.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IF YOU LIVE UNDER DURESS OF HISTORY
YOU WILL BE IN TOUCH OF MALICE--(PERSONAL MALICE) THAT IS...
RANCOUR..GET RID OF IT.
"INCORRIGIBLE OPTIMIST." ?
"IGNORE OR BYPASS SAYINGS AND BAD BEHAVIOR OF PEOPLE
TOWARDS YOU." ?
----------------------------------------
"NOTES FOR AN ACTOR"
---------------------------------
LEARN YOUR LINES
SPEED UP YOUR SPEECH, (PACING)
DO NOT AD LIB
DO NOT USE YOUR HANDS TOO MUCH
_____________---------------------------------
PEOPLE'S BACK IS BENT IN THIS COUNTRY
MOST WITH BENT BACKS ARE IMMIGRANTS
MAKING THE NATIVES FILTHY RICH.
-------------------------------------
THERE IS NO OTHER CHOICE FOR YOU BUT
TO LAUGH AWAY AT THE UGLY REALITY BY
MAKING IT LOOK ABSURD.
------------
"PECULIAR LACK OF RESPECT FOR MAN AS HE IS."??
THE SAD FACT OF EVERY DAY LIFE AND ITS EXISTENCE IS
THAT WHAT IS MISSING AND ACTUALLY TOTALLY MISSING
IS TOTAL RESPECT FOR ANOTHER PERSON UNDER ANY AND
ALL CIRCUMSTANCES, TRIVIAL OR IMPORTANT...WHAT IS MISSING
IS RESPECT FOR THE OTHER. BS
"DARING PSYCHOLOGICAL INQUISTIVENESS." ??
"AN UPROOTED ROMANTIC WHO NEVER FELT QUITE AT HOME
IN THIS WORLD AND IN FACT WAS FRIGHTENED OF IT WAS GOGOL." ??
"ESCAPE FROM REALITY INTO WORLD OF FANTASY AND LAUGHTER." ??
"SINCE REALITY CAN NOT BE WARDED OFF, MAKE IT AS RIDICULOUS AS POSSIBLE,
TRY TO DISARM IT BY MAKING IT RIDICULOUS." ??
"DISARM THEM BY IGNORING THEM."?
--------------------------------------------
"JUST THREW ME OFF, THE LECHEROUSNESS AND VULGARITY OF IT ALL--
AND THE DELIBERATE INDIFFERENT COOLNESS OF IT ALL
AS IF EVERYTHING ELSE WAS JUST FINE AND WORKING PERFECTLY
WHILE IT WAS A PERFECT DISASTER, (THE THING H WAS THERE FOR)
WAS A METICULOUS DISASTER BUT H COOLNESS AND OPPORTUNITY
TO ENTERTAIN H IN A LECHEROUS WAY WAS METICULOUS
WHILE H IGNORE THE SURROUNDINGS IN WHICH THE DISASTER H
WAS DOING WAS COMPLETELY IGNORED AND DISRESPECTED." ??BS??
------------------------------------------------------------------
"NOTES OF A MADMAN" BY GOGOL
"THE SPITEFUL IRONICAL ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE WORLD." ???
"LOUD AND BITTER LAUGHTER." ??
VULGARITY OF BEHAVIOR
--------------------------------
F**KED IT UP EVERY NIGHT
MESSED IT ALL UP
NOTHING I COULD DO TO SET IT RIGHT
NOTHING
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
WHAT IT IS THAT KARIMA COULD HAVE DONE?
SO IT FELT LIKE THAT IT SUCCEEDED IN
NOT F**KING ME UP
SO WHY SET IT RIGHT?
INSTEAD...
THE F&&KER'S ATTITUDE WAS
SO WHAT?
"IT'S FUN"
WAS THE ATTITUDE OF THE F&&KER
HE HAD MUCH MORE FUN TO F&&K IT ALL UP EVERY NIGHT
FOR HIM IT WAS A GREAT PLACE TO VISIT EVERY NIGHT
FOR FLIRTATIONS
NEVER TO SWEAT TO DO THE RIGHT THING
WHICH WAS REQUIRED IN THAT SPACE
THE PURPOSE FOR WHICH HE ENTERED THE SPACE
OR WAS ALLOWED TO ENTER THAT SPACE
BECAME THE LEAST IMPORTANT FOR HIM
IT WAS JUST A PERFECT OPPORTUNITY FOR HIM
TO ENTER THAT SPACE AND HAVE LECHEROUS ACTIVITY
AND CONTINUED TO F&UCK UP THE REAL REASON
WHY HE WAS ALLOWED IN THAT SPACE TO BEGIN WITH...
F&7KING IT UP NIGHT AFTER NIGHT
AND WHY NOT?
THAT WAS THE POWER THE BASTARD ASSUMED
TO FLIRT
TO HAVE A DATE
AS IF HE WAS COMING TO A BAR
OR TO A SOCIAL CLUB
OR TO A DATING SIGHT
OR A BROTHEL...
BUT THE REAL PLAY WAS F**KED UP
AND HE F**KED IT UP WITH REAL GLEE
AND THAT WAS THE MOST DISGUSTING....
THE MOST DISGUSTING PART OF
THE BASTARD ACTOR......
HIS LECHEROUS, VULGAR. COULDN'T CARE-SADISTIC ATTITUDE
TOWARDS THE BOSS WHO ALLOWED HIM IN TO DELIVER
AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT FUNCTION WHICH HE NEVER DELIVERED...
BUT KEPT HIS LECHEROUS BEHAVIOR INTACT THROUGHOUT...
IT MAKES ME FEEL THROWING UP
BECAUSE HE WAS NEVER FIRED.....
-------------------------------------------
THERAPY
-------------
LISTEN,
YOU HAVE TO GET OVER IT
YOU ARE HURTING YOURSELF
NO ONE ELSE BUT YOURSELF
YOU ARE ACTUALLY HURTING YOUR CREATIVITY,
YOUR ENERGY, YOUR SPIRIT, YOUR HOPE,
THUS YOUR FUTURE PROSPECTS.
FUTURE EXISTS TILL YOU DIE...
YOU ARE NOT DEAD YET...
THANK GOD.
SO HAVE SOME HOPE
DO NOT CLING TO THE NEGATIVE
LET IT GO
LET IT GO
LET IT GO.
YOU ALWAYS DO SOMETHING DESTRUCTIVE TO YOURSELF
YOU PUT ACTORS IN YOUR SHOWS WHO CAN NOT ACT
AND WHEN YOU PUT THEM IN YOUR SHOWS
YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT THEY CAN NOT ACT.
SO WHY DO YOU DO THAT?
DESTRUCTIVE ACT TO BEGIN WITH...
THE RESULT OF A DESTRUCTIVE ACT IS ALWAYS DESTRUCTION
THEN YOU SURPRISE YOURSELF
"OH1 THEY CAN'T ACT, THEY ARE AMATEUR"
I GUESS YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT ALREADY
RIGHT?
RIGHT.
AND THEN YOU CONSTANTLY AGGRESS YOUR SELF
AND WASTE TONS OF ENERGY ON THEIR BAD ACTING.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
THERAPY DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT'S WORKING FOR YOU
WHEN YOU HIRED THEM YOU KNEW IT
YOU KNEW THAT THEY ARE NOT ACTORS
YOU KNEW THAT
WHY DID YOU HIRE THEM?
WHY DID YOU PUT THOSE ASSHOLES IN YOUR SHOW?
BECAUSE...
BECAUSE WHAT?
BECAUSE THERE ARE NO GREAT ACTORS AVAILABLE IN THIS THEATER
WHY DIDN'T YOU FIND THEM FROM SOMEWHERE ELSE?
BECAUSE MOST OF THE TRAINED ACTORS DO NOT WORK FOR FREE
SO PAY THEM
WHAT?
PAY THEM
I CAN'T PAY THEM
NO ONE PAYS ME
TO PAY THEM
CAN'T AFFORD IT
SO, WHAT'S THE ANSWER?
THE ANSWER IS TO FIND TRAINED ACTORS,
PAY THEM
AND THEY WON'T ABUSE THE PROCESS
BUT THOSE ACTORS WORK IN MORE ESTABLISHED VENUES
SO THIS ONE IS NOT THE MOST ESTABLISHED VENUE?
NOT REALLY---
BUT IT'S NOT A BAD VENUE
BETTER THAN MANY OTHERS
VERY GOOD FOR CREATIVITY
AND FREEDOM TO EXPERIMENT
SO THATS A PLUS...
BUT I WISH I HAD REALLY TRAINED ACTORS
BUT YOU NEVER TRIED TO GET THEM, DID YOU?
NOT REALLY...
I JUST ASSUMED THAT THOSE ACTORS WON'T WORK HERE
OR MAYBE NOT WORK WITH YOU...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU ASSUMED THAT REALLY TRAINED ACTORS WON'T WORK WITH YOU?
I DIDN'T KNOW...MAYBE?
WHY?
(SILENCE)
WHY?
MAYBE I DON'T THINK THAT I AM ESTABLISHED ENOUGH
SO, YOU HAVE ESTABLISHED THE FACT IN YOUR OWN HEAD
THAT YOU ARE NOT ESTABLISHED AND NO ONE GOOD ENOUGH
WILL WORK WITH YOU...
I DON'T KNOW....
REALLY, IT'S JUST DIFFICULT TO GET GREAT ACTORS WHEN THEATER DOESN'T PAY
THEM.
SO, YOU HAVE STTLED YOUR HEART ON GETTING ORDINARY OR EVEN
AMATEUR ACTORS...
WHATEVER I CAN GET..
YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT YOU DESERVE BAD ACTORS?
NO, I CAN'T GET GOOD ACTORS
THEN YOUR CHOICE IS TO WORK WITH BAD ACTORS?
NO, T'S NOT MY CHOICE, IT'S NECESSITY.
WHY HAVE YOU CREATED THIS DIFFICULT NECESSITY FOR YOURSELF?
WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?
YOU CAN STOP DOING YOUR PLAYS
BUT I NEED TO GET MY WORK DONE...
BUT WHY IN SUCH A BAD AND POOR WAY?
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT IS IT THAT YOIU DON'T KNOW?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO...
YOU DON'T HAVE MANY CHOICES, DO YOU?
NO, I DON'T
BUT YOU CAN MAKE ONE OF THE CHOICES, EITHER DON'T DO THE PLAYS
OR DO THEM AND GET BETTER ACTORS
FROM WHERE?
IF YOU HAD MORE CONFIDENCE IN YOU, YOU WILL GET ACTORS WHO
HAVE BEEN ON STAGE BEFORE INSTEAD OF GETTING THE ACTORS WHO
HAVE NEVER BEEN UNDER THE LIGHTS. IF YOU HAD MORE CONFIDENCE
IN YOURSELF AGOOD ACTORS WILL BE LINING UP EVEN TO WORK FOR NO MONEY.
IT'S YOU WHO HAS LOW SELF ESTEEM AND BECAUSE OF THAT YOU ARE
DESPERATE TO GET ANY TOM, DICK AND HARRY AND PUT THEM IN TO FILL THE
ROLES FOR WHICH THEY ARE LEAST EQUIPPED. YOU ARE EMBARRASSING
YOURSELF. DO NOT FILL THE ROLES. GET REAL ACTORS, NO MATTER HOW,
THE ACTORS WHO HAVE REAL ABILITY TO DELIVER YOUR MATERIAL OR
DO NOT DO THE PLAYS.
DO ONE PERSON SHOWS
TRAVEL WITH THE SHOWS
MAKE SOME MONEY
HAVE LESS HEARTACHE
KEEP WRITING THE PLAYS WITH OTHER CHARACTERS THOUGH
KEEPPOLISHING THEM
THEN SUBMIT TO OTHER PROFESSIONAL THEATERS
REGIONAL THEATERS
SEND THEM TO BRITISH THEATERS
LONDON WILL LOVE YOUR WORK...
SEND THEM THE UN-PRODUCED PLAYS
YOU HAVE SOME. DON'T YOU?
YES.....
WHICH ONES?
"LOVE IS A TRAMP"
"SORROW AT THE TIME OF ISIS."
"THEATER OF WORDS."
THAT'S THE ANSWER
THE MEAN TIME CHANGE SOME OF YOUR BAD HABITS
EXCERCISE
ONE HOUR WALK EVERY DAY
STAIONARY BICYCLE
LOSE WEIGHT
AND WRITEA HILARIOUSLY FUNNY ONE WOMAN PLAY
AND TRAVEL WITH IT........
TIME IS UP
WE HAVE TO STOP THE SESSION
SEE YOU NEXT THURSDAY.
THANK YOU
PATIENT EXIT THE THERAPIST'S ROOM
"PRAYER"
NOTE: THIS SHORT PLAY IS NOT PART OF THE OLD NOTE BOOK OF 2013. IT'S WRITTEN TODAY, MARCH 30 2020
"PRAYER"
BY
BINA SHARIF
copyright:binasharif 2020
A SHORT PLAY
CHARACTERS:
MONA
NOOR
TWO FRIENDS LIVING AT THE TIME OF CORONA VIRUS
MONA:
I HATE PEOPLE
NOOR:
WHY?
MONA:
THE SPITEFUL, IRONIC ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE WORLD AND THE PEOPLE IN THE
WORLD. THAT'S THE IMPULSE OF ALL THE WEALTHY, POWERFUL PEOPLE TOWARDS
THE POOR, POWERLESS HUMAN BEINGS WHO ARE BEING TREATED WORSE THAN
ANIMALS. TOTALLY SPITEFUL. I HATE PEOPLE. I WANT NOTHING WITH THEM.
I NEVER WANT TO DEAL WITH THEM.
NOOR:
THIS KIND OF SITUATION HAS NEVER CHANGED IN THE WORLD.
IT'S BEEN GOING ON SINCE THE DAYS OF ADAM AND EVE. NOTHING IS GOING TO
CHANGE. WHY MUST YOU TAKE IT TO HEART? WHY MUST YOU GIVE YOUR SELF
SO MUCH HEARTACHE? DO SOMETHING CONSTRUCTIVE IN LIFE.
MONA:
MY HATRED TOWARDS THEM IS CONSTRUCTIVE.
NOOR:
BUT NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE BY YOU HATING THEM. ONLY SUFFERING
WILL COME TO YOU. YOU How are you?VE TO ACCEPT IT.
MONA:
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SAYING THIS. WE HAVE TO ACCEPT OTHER
PEOPLE'S SUFFERING? I THOUGHT YOU HAD SOME SOCIAL CONSCIOUS.
NOR:
I DO. I SUFFERED FOR YEARS BUT NOTHING CHANGED. THE WORLD IS EVIL
WE KNOW THAT.
MONA:
SO THE WORLD IS EVIL AND WE SHOULD JUST DANCE? SING ANTHEMS OF JOY AND
SUCCESS AND BE MERRY?
NOOR:
NOT EXACTLY LIKE THAT. WE HAVE TO HELP, WE HAVE TO TRY OUR BEST TO FEEL
FOR THE DOWNTRODDEN TO SURVIVE .BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY POOR AND
HUNGRY PEOPLE CREATED BY THE RICH AND POWERFUL.THEY CREATE HUNGER
AND HUNGRY HERDS BECAUSE OF THE NECESSITY FOR THEM TO REMAIN ALWAYS
FILTHY RICH AND THUS POWERFUL
WE HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM, SOMEONE HAS TO. IF THEY ARE NOT BEING
TAKEN CARED FOR, THERE WILL BE DISEASES AND PLAGUES AND AFTER EFFECTS
OF THE STOLEN WEALTH AND SOME ONE UP THERE IS WATCHING, SOME ONE WHO
HAS OWN SECRETS AND WHO IS PATIENT AND HAD BEEN FOR CENTURIES BUT IS
NOW PISSED AT THE ZALAM, (CRUEL) LEADERS OF THE WORLD WHO HAVE
BROUGHT THE REST OF HUMANITY TO THIS PATHETIC LEVEL AND NEEDS TO BE
TAUGHT A LESSON AND THIS INVISIBLE ENEMY OF ALL HUMANITY IS THE SIGN, IS
THE SYMBOL, IS THE LESSON AND IF WE WHO DARE CALL OUR SELVES HUMAN AND
EQUAL AND JUST (WHAT A LAUGH) DO NOT LEARN NOW AT THE TIME OF THIS
OMINOUS CRISIS THEN IT'S QYIAMAT (END OF THE WORLD, THE APPOCLYPSE)
SOME ONE HAS TO BRING THE ELEMENT OF SPIRITUALITY INTO SOLVING THIS
TRAGEDY BESIDE SCIENCE , RESEARCH AND THE MEDICAL KNOWLEDGE.
FAITH, JUSTIC, HUMANITY, SPIRIT, KINDNESS, EMPATHY, COMPASSION HAS TO COME
INTO THE HEALING PROCESS.
WE ALSO NEED TO TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES, OUR HEALTH, OUR PRODUCTIVITY,
OUR ENERGIES MUST NOT BE SPENT ON HATE. WE NEED TO PRAY.
ESPECIALLY NOW, AT THE TIME OF DISEASE, THIS MONSTER, THIS INVISIBLE ENEMY
WHICH IS KILLING THOUSANDS...
MONA:
YES, YES, YES, THAT'S WHY I HATE THE SELFISH, THE POWERFUL, THE GREEDY, THE
FILTHY RICH. THEY WILL SURVIVE THIS VIRUS. THEY SURVIVE ALL VIRUSES, THEY
SURVIVE THE PLAGUES BECAUSE THEY KNOW HOW TO SURVIVE BECAUSE THEY
CREATE ALL THESE PLAGUES...
NOOR:
DON'T SAY THAT. THIS TIME THEY ARE SUFFERING TOO AND NO ONE IS EVIL
ENOUGH TO CREATE SUCH HORROR. THEY THEMSELVES ARE BEING EFFECTED BY
THIS CONTAGION. IT'S IN THE NATURE...NATURE HAS BECOME THE ENEMY THIS
TIME.
MONA:
YES, IT'S INSIDE NATURE BECAUSE THEY THEMSELVES HAVE DESTROYED NATURE.
THE EARTH IS POISONED WITH BOMBS EXPLODING KILLING MILLIONS, CAUSING
DISEASES, CANCERS, CANCERS OF THE SOUL, THE PERMANENT VIRUS CREATED BY
HUMAN BEINGS WITH THE POWER OF THEIR MIGHT AND MILITARY WHICH RUINED
THE EARTH AND TURNED IT INTO BOILING LAVA.
UNHEALTHY FOOD, WITH INJECTIONS CAUSED BY THE DRUGS ADDED TO MAKE IT
LOOK MORE SHINY, MORE BRIGHT, MORE LASTING BUT CAUSING UNKNOWN
ILLNESS...MYSTERIOUS ILLNESS, THE POLLUTION IN THE AIR, THE MASSES
RUSHING AND CRUSHING THE EARTH AND THE HUMANS ON IT...THE INCREDIBLE
RUSH OF GREED AND POWER, THE SUBJUGATION OF THE OPPRESSED, OF THE POOR,
THE CRUELTY OF THE LEADERS, ....
THIS KILLER VIRUS IS THE SIGN OF REVENGE OF NATURE BEING TREATED SO
ABOMINABLY. IT'S THE PUNISHMENT. NATURE STOOD UP FINALLY TO DEMAND HER
RIGHT TO EXIST. NATURE TOLD THEM, "LOOK HOW YOU DESTROYED ME"
"YOU DESTROYED ME TO HAVE MORE DIAMONDS, MORE OIL, MORE BUILDINGS,
MORE...MORE...MORE.
NOTHING WAS ENOUGH FOR YOUR GREED, FOR YOUR CONTROL. YOU ALWAYS
WANTED MORE, MORE, MORE. WHAT WILL FINALLY QUENCH YOUR THIRST?
WHAT WILL MAKE YOU LESS HUNGRY.
YOU HAVE IT ALL.
YOUR SHARE AND THE REST OF THE WORLD'S SHARE.
WHAT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY?
NOTHING, I GUESS.
SO DEAL WITH ME NOW...DEAL WITH ME...I AM HERE BUT YOU CAN'T SEE ME.
THATS MY BEAUTY.
THATS MY POWER
YOU CAN'T BOMB ME
YOU CAN BOMB EVERY MOVING CREATURE BUT YOU CAN'T BOMB ME
I SLEEP WITH YOU
I WAKE UP WITH YOU
I EAT WITH YOU
I DRINK WITH YOU
I SIT WITH YOU
I AM HERE
BUT YOU CAN NOT SEE ME
I AM THE INVISIBLE VIRUS
I AM THE INVISIBLE REVENGE.
"LOOK HOW YOU PLUCKED MY COLORS AND TURNED IT INTO BLOOD." NATURE
TOLD THEM, "LOOK HOW YOU HAVE MUDDIED MY FLOWERS? HOW YOU DIDN'T
LEARN THE LESSON WHEN I BROUGHT THE DEADLY STORMS, THE FIRES, WHEN I
BURNT YOUR FORESTS, YOU DIDN'T PAY ATTENTION, YOU KEPT YOUR CRUELTY
GOING, YOU EAT CAVIAR AND DRANK CHAMPAGNE AND KEPT DANCING IN YOUR
MANSIONS, YOU KEPT FLYING IN YOUR PRIVATE JETS. DID YOU EVER SEE THE
HOMELESS ON THE GROUND FROM YOUR JETS? DID YOU SEE THE GHETTOS WHICH
YOU CREATED ALL OVER MY PLANET? DID YOU STOP FOR A MOMENT TO THINK OF
THE SUFFERING OF THE EARTH? SUFFERING OF HUNGRY? SUFFERING OF SICK
CHILDREN? POVERTY ALL OVER THE PLANET WHICH YOU CREATED BY YOUR
GREED?
HOW COME YOU NEVER STOPPED FOR A FRACTION OF A SECOND TO THINK OF THE
OTHER? THE OTHER YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW, THE OTHER YOU AVOID LIKE
PLAGUE?
NOW THE PLAGUE IS IN YOUR HOUSE, IN YOUR GARDEN, IN YOUR YACHTS, IN YOUR
PLANES, IN YOUR CLUBS, IN YOUR CONCERT HALLS, IN YOUR MOUNTAINS, IN
YOUR GARDENS.
IN YOUR FURNITURE, IN YOUR HANDS, ON YOUR FACES....
ARE YOU HUMBLE NOW? ARE YOU HUMBLE NOW? ARE YOU? PRAY.
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
PRAY FOR FORGIVENESS FOR YOUR SINS...ASK FOR FORGIVENESS.
ARE YOU SENSITIVE TO OTHER HUMAN BEINGS SUFFERING NOW?
ARE YOU GOING TO BE CIVIL?
ARE YOU GOING TO TREAT EVERY ONE ON THIS EARTH AS YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE
TREATED? YOU SAY, "WE ARE ALL IN IT TOGETHER." ARE YOU? ARE YOU? ARE
YOU? ARE YOU GOING TO LEARN A FINAL LESSON? ARE YOU GOING TO LESSEN
YOUR GREED? YOUR CRUELTY? YOUR WARS? YOUR TREATMENT OF OTHER
HUMAN BEINGS WHO HAVE LESS DIAMONDS THAN YOU?
LESS MANSIONS THEN YOU,?LESS BANK BALANCE THEN YOU?
ARE YOU? ARE YOU? ARE YOU?
IF YOU ARE NOT, I, THE NATURE WHO BROUGHT THIS VIRUS, THIS INFECTION, THIS
DEATH TO YOU WILL NEVER GO AWAY...IF YOU DO NOT LEARN THE LESSON TO BE
HUMAN NOW, THE PLAGUE WILL NEVER GO AWAY TILL ALL OF YOU ARE WIPED
OFF FROM THE FACE OF THIS EARTH.
NOOR:
LIFE IS SUCH A TRAGEDY
MONA:
LIFE IS GOOD, LIFE WAS GOOD TILL WE THE EVIL HUMAN MADE IT INTO A
CATASTROPHE FOR ALL OF US, FOR THE WHOLE HUMAN RACE
NOOR:
WHAT NEED TO BE DONE NOW?
MONA:
WE NEED TO PRAY, PRAY AND PRY FOR FORGIVENESS FOR NOT SEEING
THE REST OF HUMANITY AND IT'S SUFFERING. WE NEED TO CHANGE, COMPLETELY
CHANGE. WE NEED TO LEARN FROM THIS ILLNESS AND ASK THE POWER ABOVE
FOR FORGIVENESS.
NOOR:
LET'S US PRAY. THE MOAZZAN IS CALLING, CALLING THE FAITHFUL TO BOW DOWN
TO THE ONLY POWER WHO CAN HEAL, ALMIGHTY GOD. LET US PRAY BEFORE THE
SUN GOES DOWN. I HEARD THAT THIS TIME OF THE DUSK THE PRAYERS ARE
ALWAYS BEING HEARD.
(THEY BOTH PRAY, GO INTO SAJDA)
THE FIGHT WITH OURSELVES NOT TO FEEL WHAT WE ARE MADE TO FEEL,
WHAT WE ARE FORCED TO FEEL.
UNDOING WHAT'S BEEN DONE TO US IS MONUMENTAL EFFORT
AND WE ARE EXHAUSTED TO GO OUT AND FIGHT AND TRY TO TAKE
THIS FALSE, ASSUMED TRAGIC REALITY OUT OF OUR LIVES.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IF YOU LIVE UNDER DURESS OF HISTORY
YOU WILL BE IN TOUCH OF MALICE--(PERSONAL MALICE) THAT IS...
RANCOUR..GET RID OF IT.
"INCORRIGIBLE OPTIMIST." ?
"IGNORE OR BYPASS SAYINGS AND BAD BEHAVIOR OF PEOPLE
TOWARDS YOU." ?
----------------------------------------
"NOTES FOR AN ACTOR"
---------------------------------
LEARN YOUR LINES
SPEED UP YOUR SPEECH, (PACING)
DO NOT AD LIB
DO NOT USE YOUR HANDS TOO MUCH
_____________---------------------------------
PEOPLE'S BACK IS BENT IN THIS COUNTRY
MOST WITH BENT BACKS ARE IMMIGRANTS
MAKING THE NATIVES FILTHY RICH.
-------------------------------------
THERE IS NO OTHER CHOICE FOR YOU BUT
TO LAUGH AWAY AT THE UGLY REALITY BY
MAKING IT LOOK ABSURD.
------------
"PECULIAR LACK OF RESPECT FOR MAN AS HE IS."??
THE SAD FACT OF EVERY DAY LIFE AND ITS EXISTENCE IS
THAT WHAT IS MISSING AND ACTUALLY TOTALLY MISSING
IS TOTAL RESPECT FOR ANOTHER PERSON UNDER ANY AND
ALL CIRCUMSTANCES, TRIVIAL OR IMPORTANT...WHAT IS MISSING
IS RESPECT FOR THE OTHER. BS
"DARING PSYCHOLOGICAL INQUISTIVENESS." ??
"AN UPROOTED ROMANTIC WHO NEVER FELT QUITE AT HOME
IN THIS WORLD AND IN FACT WAS FRIGHTENED OF IT WAS GOGOL." ??
"ESCAPE FROM REALITY INTO WORLD OF FANTASY AND LAUGHTER." ??
"SINCE REALITY CAN NOT BE WARDED OFF, MAKE IT AS RIDICULOUS AS POSSIBLE,
TRY TO DISARM IT BY MAKING IT RIDICULOUS." ??
"DISARM THEM BY IGNORING THEM."?
--------------------------------------------
"JUST THREW ME OFF, THE LECHEROUSNESS AND VULGARITY OF IT ALL--
AND THE DELIBERATE INDIFFERENT COOLNESS OF IT ALL
AS IF EVERYTHING ELSE WAS JUST FINE AND WORKING PERFECTLY
WHILE IT WAS A PERFECT DISASTER, (THE THING H WAS THERE FOR)
WAS A METICULOUS DISASTER BUT H COOLNESS AND OPPORTUNITY
TO ENTERTAIN H IN A LECHEROUS WAY WAS METICULOUS
WHILE H IGNORE THE SURROUNDINGS IN WHICH THE DISASTER H
WAS DOING WAS COMPLETELY IGNORED AND DISRESPECTED." ??BS??
------------------------------------------------------------------
"NOTES OF A MADMAN" BY GOGOL
"THE SPITEFUL IRONICAL ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE WORLD." ???
"LOUD AND BITTER LAUGHTER." ??
VULGARITY OF BEHAVIOR
--------------------------------
F**KED IT UP EVERY NIGHT
MESSED IT ALL UP
NOTHING I COULD DO TO SET IT RIGHT
NOTHING
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
WHAT IT IS THAT KARIMA COULD HAVE DONE?
SO IT FELT LIKE THAT IT SUCCEEDED IN
NOT F**KING ME UP
SO WHY SET IT RIGHT?
INSTEAD...
THE F&&KER'S ATTITUDE WAS
SO WHAT?
"IT'S FUN"
WAS THE ATTITUDE OF THE F&&KER
HE HAD MUCH MORE FUN TO F&&K IT ALL UP EVERY NIGHT
FOR HIM IT WAS A GREAT PLACE TO VISIT EVERY NIGHT
FOR FLIRTATIONS
NEVER TO SWEAT TO DO THE RIGHT THING
WHICH WAS REQUIRED IN THAT SPACE
THE PURPOSE FOR WHICH HE ENTERED THE SPACE
OR WAS ALLOWED TO ENTER THAT SPACE
BECAME THE LEAST IMPORTANT FOR HIM
IT WAS JUST A PERFECT OPPORTUNITY FOR HIM
TO ENTER THAT SPACE AND HAVE LECHEROUS ACTIVITY
AND CONTINUED TO F&UCK UP THE REAL REASON
WHY HE WAS ALLOWED IN THAT SPACE TO BEGIN WITH...
F&7KING IT UP NIGHT AFTER NIGHT
AND WHY NOT?
THAT WAS THE POWER THE BASTARD ASSUMED
TO FLIRT
TO HAVE A DATE
AS IF HE WAS COMING TO A BAR
OR TO A SOCIAL CLUB
OR TO A DATING SIGHT
OR A BROTHEL...
BUT THE REAL PLAY WAS F**KED UP
AND HE F**KED IT UP WITH REAL GLEE
AND THAT WAS THE MOST DISGUSTING....
THE MOST DISGUSTING PART OF
THE BASTARD ACTOR......
HIS LECHEROUS, VULGAR. COULDN'T CARE-SADISTIC ATTITUDE
TOWARDS THE BOSS WHO ALLOWED HIM IN TO DELIVER
AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT FUNCTION WHICH HE NEVER DELIVERED...
BUT KEPT HIS LECHEROUS BEHAVIOR INTACT THROUGHOUT...
IT MAKES ME FEEL THROWING UP
BECAUSE HE WAS NEVER FIRED.....
-------------------------------------------
THERAPY
-------------
LISTEN,
YOU HAVE TO GET OVER IT
YOU ARE HURTING YOURSELF
NO ONE ELSE BUT YOURSELF
YOU ARE ACTUALLY HURTING YOUR CREATIVITY,
YOUR ENERGY, YOUR SPIRIT, YOUR HOPE,
THUS YOUR FUTURE PROSPECTS.
FUTURE EXISTS TILL YOU DIE...
YOU ARE NOT DEAD YET...
THANK GOD.
SO HAVE SOME HOPE
DO NOT CLING TO THE NEGATIVE
LET IT GO
LET IT GO
LET IT GO.
YOU ALWAYS DO SOMETHING DESTRUCTIVE TO YOURSELF
YOU PUT ACTORS IN YOUR SHOWS WHO CAN NOT ACT
AND WHEN YOU PUT THEM IN YOUR SHOWS
YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT THEY CAN NOT ACT.
SO WHY DO YOU DO THAT?
DESTRUCTIVE ACT TO BEGIN WITH...
THE RESULT OF A DESTRUCTIVE ACT IS ALWAYS DESTRUCTION
THEN YOU SURPRISE YOURSELF
"OH1 THEY CAN'T ACT, THEY ARE AMATEUR"
I GUESS YOU DIDN'T KNOW THAT ALREADY
RIGHT?
RIGHT.
AND THEN YOU CONSTANTLY AGGRESS YOUR SELF
AND WASTE TONS OF ENERGY ON THEIR BAD ACTING.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?
THERAPY DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT'S WORKING FOR YOU
WHEN YOU HIRED THEM YOU KNEW IT
YOU KNEW THAT THEY ARE NOT ACTORS
YOU KNEW THAT
WHY DID YOU HIRE THEM?
WHY DID YOU PUT THOSE ASSHOLES IN YOUR SHOW?
BECAUSE...
BECAUSE WHAT?
BECAUSE THERE ARE NO GREAT ACTORS AVAILABLE IN THIS THEATER
WHY DIDN'T YOU FIND THEM FROM SOMEWHERE ELSE?
BECAUSE MOST OF THE TRAINED ACTORS DO NOT WORK FOR FREE
SO PAY THEM
WHAT?
PAY THEM
I CAN'T PAY THEM
NO ONE PAYS ME
TO PAY THEM
CAN'T AFFORD IT
SO, WHAT'S THE ANSWER?
THE ANSWER IS TO FIND TRAINED ACTORS,
PAY THEM
AND THEY WON'T ABUSE THE PROCESS
BUT THOSE ACTORS WORK IN MORE ESTABLISHED VENUES
SO THIS ONE IS NOT THE MOST ESTABLISHED VENUE?
NOT REALLY---
BUT IT'S NOT A BAD VENUE
BETTER THAN MANY OTHERS
VERY GOOD FOR CREATIVITY
AND FREEDOM TO EXPERIMENT
SO THATS A PLUS...
BUT I WISH I HAD REALLY TRAINED ACTORS
BUT YOU NEVER TRIED TO GET THEM, DID YOU?
NOT REALLY...
I JUST ASSUMED THAT THOSE ACTORS WON'T WORK HERE
OR MAYBE NOT WORK WITH YOU...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU ASSUMED THAT REALLY TRAINED ACTORS WON'T WORK WITH YOU?
I DIDN'T KNOW...MAYBE?
WHY?
(SILENCE)
WHY?
MAYBE I DON'T THINK THAT I AM ESTABLISHED ENOUGH
SO, YOU HAVE ESTABLISHED THE FACT IN YOUR OWN HEAD
THAT YOU ARE NOT ESTABLISHED AND NO ONE GOOD ENOUGH
WILL WORK WITH YOU...
I DON'T KNOW....
REALLY, IT'S JUST DIFFICULT TO GET GREAT ACTORS WHEN THEATER DOESN'T PAY
THEM.
SO, YOU HAVE STTLED YOUR HEART ON GETTING ORDINARY OR EVEN
AMATEUR ACTORS...
WHATEVER I CAN GET..
YOU REALLY BELIEVE THAT YOU DESERVE BAD ACTORS?
NO, I CAN'T GET GOOD ACTORS
THEN YOUR CHOICE IS TO WORK WITH BAD ACTORS?
NO, T'S NOT MY CHOICE, IT'S NECESSITY.
WHY HAVE YOU CREATED THIS DIFFICULT NECESSITY FOR YOURSELF?
WHAT ELSE CAN I DO?
YOU CAN STOP DOING YOUR PLAYS
BUT I NEED TO GET MY WORK DONE...
BUT WHY IN SUCH A BAD AND POOR WAY?
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT IS IT THAT YOIU DON'T KNOW?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO...
YOU DON'T HAVE MANY CHOICES, DO YOU?
NO, I DON'T
BUT YOU CAN MAKE ONE OF THE CHOICES, EITHER DON'T DO THE PLAYS
OR DO THEM AND GET BETTER ACTORS
FROM WHERE?
IF YOU HAD MORE CONFIDENCE IN YOU, YOU WILL GET ACTORS WHO
HAVE BEEN ON STAGE BEFORE INSTEAD OF GETTING THE ACTORS WHO
HAVE NEVER BEEN UNDER THE LIGHTS. IF YOU HAD MORE CONFIDENCE
IN YOURSELF AGOOD ACTORS WILL BE LINING UP EVEN TO WORK FOR NO MONEY.
IT'S YOU WHO HAS LOW SELF ESTEEM AND BECAUSE OF THAT YOU ARE
DESPERATE TO GET ANY TOM, DICK AND HARRY AND PUT THEM IN TO FILL THE
ROLES FOR WHICH THEY ARE LEAST EQUIPPED. YOU ARE EMBARRASSING
YOURSELF. DO NOT FILL THE ROLES. GET REAL ACTORS, NO MATTER HOW,
THE ACTORS WHO HAVE REAL ABILITY TO DELIVER YOUR MATERIAL OR
DO NOT DO THE PLAYS.
DO ONE PERSON SHOWS
TRAVEL WITH THE SHOWS
MAKE SOME MONEY
HAVE LESS HEARTACHE
KEEP WRITING THE PLAYS WITH OTHER CHARACTERS THOUGH
KEEPPOLISHING THEM
THEN SUBMIT TO OTHER PROFESSIONAL THEATERS
REGIONAL THEATERS
SEND THEM TO BRITISH THEATERS
LONDON WILL LOVE YOUR WORK...
SEND THEM THE UN-PRODUCED PLAYS
YOU HAVE SOME. DON'T YOU?
YES.....
WHICH ONES?
"LOVE IS A TRAMP"
"SORROW AT THE TIME OF ISIS."
"THEATER OF WORDS."
THAT'S THE ANSWER
THE MEAN TIME CHANGE SOME OF YOUR BAD HABITS
EXCERCISE
ONE HOUR WALK EVERY DAY
STAIONARY BICYCLE
LOSE WEIGHT
AND WRITEA HILARIOUSLY FUNNY ONE WOMAN PLAY
AND TRAVEL WITH IT........
TIME IS UP
WE HAVE TO STOP THE SESSION
SEE YOU NEXT THURSDAY.
THANK YOU
PATIENT EXIT THE THERAPIST'S ROOM
"PRAYER"
NOTE: THIS SHORT PLAY IS NOT PART OF THE OLD NOTE BOOK OF 2013. IT'S WRITTEN TODAY, MARCH 30 2020
"PRAYER"
BY
BINA SHARIF
copyright:binasharif 2020
A SHORT PLAY
CHARACTERS:
MONA
NOOR
TWO FRIENDS LIVING AT THE TIME OF CORONA VIRUS
MONA:
I HATE PEOPLE
NOOR:
WHY?
MONA:
THE SPITEFUL, IRONIC ATTITUDE TOWARDS THE WORLD AND THE PEOPLE IN THE
WORLD. THAT'S THE IMPULSE OF ALL THE WEALTHY, POWERFUL PEOPLE TOWARDS
THE POOR, POWERLESS HUMAN BEINGS WHO ARE BEING TREATED WORSE THAN
ANIMALS. TOTALLY SPITEFUL. I HATE PEOPLE. I WANT NOTHING WITH THEM.
I NEVER WANT TO DEAL WITH THEM.
NOOR:
THIS KIND OF SITUATION HAS NEVER CHANGED IN THE WORLD.
IT'S BEEN GOING ON SINCE THE DAYS OF ADAM AND EVE. NOTHING IS GOING TO
CHANGE. WHY MUST YOU TAKE IT TO HEART? WHY MUST YOU GIVE YOUR SELF
SO MUCH HEARTACHE? DO SOMETHING CONSTRUCTIVE IN LIFE.
MONA:
MY HATRED TOWARDS THEM IS CONSTRUCTIVE.
NOOR:
BUT NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE BY YOU HATING THEM. ONLY SUFFERING
WILL COME TO YOU. YOU How are you?VE TO ACCEPT IT.
MONA:
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SAYING THIS. WE HAVE TO ACCEPT OTHER
PEOPLE'S SUFFERING? I THOUGHT YOU HAD SOME SOCIAL CONSCIOUS.
NOR:
I DO. I SUFFERED FOR YEARS BUT NOTHING CHANGED. THE WORLD IS EVIL
WE KNOW THAT.
MONA:
SO THE WORLD IS EVIL AND WE SHOULD JUST DANCE? SING ANTHEMS OF JOY AND
SUCCESS AND BE MERRY?
NOOR:
NOT EXACTLY LIKE THAT. WE HAVE TO HELP, WE HAVE TO TRY OUR BEST TO FEEL
FOR THE DOWNTRODDEN TO SURVIVE .BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY POOR AND
HUNGRY PEOPLE CREATED BY THE RICH AND POWERFUL.THEY CREATE HUNGER
AND HUNGRY HERDS BECAUSE OF THE NECESSITY FOR THEM TO REMAIN ALWAYS
FILTHY RICH AND THUS POWERFUL
WE HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM, SOMEONE HAS TO. IF THEY ARE NOT BEING
TAKEN CARED FOR, THERE WILL BE DISEASES AND PLAGUES AND AFTER EFFECTS
OF THE STOLEN WEALTH AND SOME ONE UP THERE IS WATCHING, SOME ONE WHO
HAS OWN SECRETS AND WHO IS PATIENT AND HAD BEEN FOR CENTURIES BUT IS
NOW PISSED AT THE ZALAM, (CRUEL) LEADERS OF THE WORLD WHO HAVE
BROUGHT THE REST OF HUMANITY TO THIS PATHETIC LEVEL AND NEEDS TO BE
TAUGHT A LESSON AND THIS INVISIBLE ENEMY OF ALL HUMANITY IS THE SIGN, IS
THE SYMBOL, IS THE LESSON AND IF WE WHO DARE CALL OUR SELVES HUMAN AND
EQUAL AND JUST (WHAT A LAUGH) DO NOT LEARN NOW AT THE TIME OF THIS
OMINOUS CRISIS THEN IT'S QYIAMAT (END OF THE WORLD, THE APPOCLYPSE)
SOME ONE HAS TO BRING THE ELEMENT OF SPIRITUALITY INTO SOLVING THIS
TRAGEDY BESIDE SCIENCE , RESEARCH AND THE MEDICAL KNOWLEDGE.
FAITH, JUSTIC, HUMANITY, SPIRIT, KINDNESS, EMPATHY, COMPASSION HAS TO COME
INTO THE HEALING PROCESS.
WE ALSO NEED TO TAKE CARE OF OURSELVES, OUR HEALTH, OUR PRODUCTIVITY,
OUR ENERGIES MUST NOT BE SPENT ON HATE. WE NEED TO PRAY.
ESPECIALLY NOW, AT THE TIME OF DISEASE, THIS MONSTER, THIS INVISIBLE ENEMY
WHICH IS KILLING THOUSANDS...
MONA:
YES, YES, YES, THAT'S WHY I HATE THE SELFISH, THE POWERFUL, THE GREEDY, THE
FILTHY RICH. THEY WILL SURVIVE THIS VIRUS. THEY SURVIVE ALL VIRUSES, THEY
SURVIVE THE PLAGUES BECAUSE THEY KNOW HOW TO SURVIVE BECAUSE THEY
CREATE ALL THESE PLAGUES...
NOOR:
DON'T SAY THAT. THIS TIME THEY ARE SUFFERING TOO AND NO ONE IS EVIL
ENOUGH TO CREATE SUCH HORROR. THEY THEMSELVES ARE BEING EFFECTED BY
THIS CONTAGION. IT'S IN THE NATURE...NATURE HAS BECOME THE ENEMY THIS
TIME.
MONA:
YES, IT'S INSIDE NATURE BECAUSE THEY THEMSELVES HAVE DESTROYED NATURE.
THE EARTH IS POISONED WITH BOMBS EXPLODING KILLING MILLIONS, CAUSING
DISEASES, CANCERS, CANCERS OF THE SOUL, THE PERMANENT VIRUS CREATED BY
HUMAN BEINGS WITH THE POWER OF THEIR MIGHT AND MILITARY WHICH RUINED
THE EARTH AND TURNED IT INTO BOILING LAVA.
UNHEALTHY FOOD, WITH INJECTIONS CAUSED BY THE DRUGS ADDED TO MAKE IT
LOOK MORE SHINY, MORE BRIGHT, MORE LASTING BUT CAUSING UNKNOWN
ILLNESS...MYSTERIOUS ILLNESS, THE POLLUTION IN THE AIR, THE MASSES
RUSHING AND CRUSHING THE EARTH AND THE HUMANS ON IT...THE INCREDIBLE
RUSH OF GREED AND POWER, THE SUBJUGATION OF THE OPPRESSED, OF THE POOR,
THE CRUELTY OF THE LEADERS, ....
THIS KILLER VIRUS IS THE SIGN OF REVENGE OF NATURE BEING TREATED SO
ABOMINABLY. IT'S THE PUNISHMENT. NATURE STOOD UP FINALLY TO DEMAND HER
RIGHT TO EXIST. NATURE TOLD THEM, "LOOK HOW YOU DESTROYED ME"
"YOU DESTROYED ME TO HAVE MORE DIAMONDS, MORE OIL, MORE BUILDINGS,
MORE...MORE...MORE.
NOTHING WAS ENOUGH FOR YOUR GREED, FOR YOUR CONTROL. YOU ALWAYS
WANTED MORE, MORE, MORE. WHAT WILL FINALLY QUENCH YOUR THIRST?
WHAT WILL MAKE YOU LESS HUNGRY.
YOU HAVE IT ALL.
YOUR SHARE AND THE REST OF THE WORLD'S SHARE.
WHAT WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY?
NOTHING, I GUESS.
SO DEAL WITH ME NOW...DEAL WITH ME...I AM HERE BUT YOU CAN'T SEE ME.
THATS MY BEAUTY.
THATS MY POWER
YOU CAN'T BOMB ME
YOU CAN BOMB EVERY MOVING CREATURE BUT YOU CAN'T BOMB ME
I SLEEP WITH YOU
I WAKE UP WITH YOU
I EAT WITH YOU
I DRINK WITH YOU
I SIT WITH YOU
I AM HERE
BUT YOU CAN NOT SEE ME
I AM THE INVISIBLE VIRUS
I AM THE INVISIBLE REVENGE.
"LOOK HOW YOU PLUCKED MY COLORS AND TURNED IT INTO BLOOD." NATURE
TOLD THEM, "LOOK HOW YOU HAVE MUDDIED MY FLOWERS? HOW YOU DIDN'T
LEARN THE LESSON WHEN I BROUGHT THE DEADLY STORMS, THE FIRES, WHEN I
BURNT YOUR FORESTS, YOU DIDN'T PAY ATTENTION, YOU KEPT YOUR CRUELTY
GOING, YOU EAT CAVIAR AND DRANK CHAMPAGNE AND KEPT DANCING IN YOUR
MANSIONS, YOU KEPT FLYING IN YOUR PRIVATE JETS. DID YOU EVER SEE THE
HOMELESS ON THE GROUND FROM YOUR JETS? DID YOU SEE THE GHETTOS WHICH
YOU CREATED ALL OVER MY PLANET? DID YOU STOP FOR A MOMENT TO THINK OF
THE SUFFERING OF THE EARTH? SUFFERING OF HUNGRY? SUFFERING OF SICK
CHILDREN? POVERTY ALL OVER THE PLANET WHICH YOU CREATED BY YOUR
GREED?
HOW COME YOU NEVER STOPPED FOR A FRACTION OF A SECOND TO THINK OF THE
OTHER? THE OTHER YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW, THE OTHER YOU AVOID LIKE
PLAGUE?
NOW THE PLAGUE IS IN YOUR HOUSE, IN YOUR GARDEN, IN YOUR YACHTS, IN YOUR
PLANES, IN YOUR CLUBS, IN YOUR CONCERT HALLS, IN YOUR MOUNTAINS, IN
YOUR GARDENS.
IN YOUR FURNITURE, IN YOUR HANDS, ON YOUR FACES....
ARE YOU HUMBLE NOW? ARE YOU HUMBLE NOW? ARE YOU? PRAY.
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
PRAY FOR FORGIVENESS FOR YOUR SINS...ASK FOR FORGIVENESS.
ARE YOU SENSITIVE TO OTHER HUMAN BEINGS SUFFERING NOW?
ARE YOU GOING TO BE CIVIL?
ARE YOU GOING TO TREAT EVERY ONE ON THIS EARTH AS YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE
TREATED? YOU SAY, "WE ARE ALL IN IT TOGETHER." ARE YOU? ARE YOU? ARE
YOU? ARE YOU GOING TO LEARN A FINAL LESSON? ARE YOU GOING TO LESSEN
YOUR GREED? YOUR CRUELTY? YOUR WARS? YOUR TREATMENT OF OTHER
HUMAN BEINGS WHO HAVE LESS DIAMONDS THAN YOU?
LESS MANSIONS THEN YOU,?LESS BANK BALANCE THEN YOU?
ARE YOU? ARE YOU? ARE YOU?
IF YOU ARE NOT, I, THE NATURE WHO BROUGHT THIS VIRUS, THIS INFECTION, THIS
DEATH TO YOU WILL NEVER GO AWAY...IF YOU DO NOT LEARN THE LESSON TO BE
HUMAN NOW, THE PLAGUE WILL NEVER GO AWAY TILL ALL OF YOU ARE WIPED
OFF FROM THE FACE OF THIS EARTH.
NOOR:
LIFE IS SUCH A TRAGEDY
MONA:
LIFE IS GOOD, LIFE WAS GOOD TILL WE THE EVIL HUMAN MADE IT INTO A
CATASTROPHE FOR ALL OF US, FOR THE WHOLE HUMAN RACE
NOOR:
WHAT NEED TO BE DONE NOW?
MONA:
WE NEED TO PRAY, PRAY AND PRY FOR FORGIVENESS FOR NOT SEEING
THE REST OF HUMANITY AND IT'S SUFFERING. WE NEED TO CHANGE, COMPLETELY
CHANGE. WE NEED TO LEARN FROM THIS ILLNESS AND ASK THE POWER ABOVE
FOR FORGIVENESS.
NOOR:
LET'S US PRAY. THE MOAZZAN IS CALLING, CALLING THE FAITHFUL TO BOW DOWN
TO THE ONLY POWER WHO CAN HEAL, ALMIGHTY GOD. LET US PRAY BEFORE THE
SUN GOES DOWN. I HEARD THAT THIS TIME OF THE DUSK THE PRAYERS ARE
ALWAYS BEING HEARD.
(THEY BOTH PRAY, GO INTO SAJDA)
Monday, March 23, 2020
LITTLE BIT FROM THE OLD NOTEBOOKS, NOTE BOOK OF JULY 2013
LITTLE BIT FROM THE OLD NOTEBOOKS, NOTE BOOK OF JULY 2013
I HAVE TO GO TO A CAFE TO THINK. BS
I WATCHED BROKE BACK MOUNTAIN LAST NIGHT
"LURE OF THE WEST
ATTACHMENT TO HOME
FAMILY
AND
LOVE OF SPICE" (CONFLICT HAS BEEN CREATED ALREADY). BS
"ONE PART OF LIFE IS FREEDOM
THE OTHER PART IS LOVE OF FAMILY
WARMTH OF THE YOUR OWN HOME
FREEDOM ALONE CHOKE YOU OBLIVION
WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE THE OTHER PART OF LIFE...
WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE UNFREE
OR THE PART YOU THOUGHT WAS, "UNFREE"
AT THAT TIME.
"VALUE OF A LIFE OF SENSATIONS." ANNONYMUS
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
UGLY DRAWING
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?
WHAT DOES THE DRAWING MEANS?
WHO KNOWS
IT'S PRETTY UGLY
I KNOW---I AM INTO UGLY ART THESE DAYS
----------------------------------------------------------------
SHE IS A HOST OF A COMEDY SHOW
SHE INVITES GUESTS ON HER SHOW
GUESTS IMITATES STARS
SUCH AS JERRY LEWIS
JACKI MASON
THOMAS MITCHELL
RICHARD BURTON
NIGHT SCENES:
NIGHTNARES
PRESENCE OF SNAKES
KNIVES
SWORDS
PISTOLS
THREATENING
FATALISTIC NIGHTMARES
COMEDY SHOW HOST IS A CULTURAL CRITIC
DOES A MONOLOGUE ON, "INTERNET DATING"
ORGANIC FOOD
COMMODITY ORGANIC FOOD STORE
GET YOUR MONEY BACK
THE FOOD IS NOT ORGANIC
CHICKEN VERY SMELLY
GO GET THE CREDIT
COOKING
EATING
GO TO DO THE COMEDY SHOW
TRYING TO BE HEALTHY TOD OTHE COMEDY SHOW
BUT NO COMEDY SHOW HAPPENS
ONLY THE NIGHTMARES OF THE NIGHT
INVITATION TO DREAMS
DREAMS TURNING INTO NIGHTMARES
"A MEMORY PLAY"
BY
BINA SHRAIF
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MURDERS
HUSBANDS KILLING WIVES
WIVES KILLING CHILDREN
STUDENTS KILLING STUDENTS
FATHERS KILLING SONS
FATHER KILLING ALL THE CHILDREN,
THE WIFE
AND THEN HIMSELF."
THE END.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
THAT'S CALLED, COMEDY NIGHT LIVE"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
CAFE
NEWS PAPERS
TEA
READ ABOUT THE CURRENT MURDERS
TAKE NOTES FOR FUTURE PROJECTS
HAVE EXPRESSO
TRIALS
PROSECUTORS
DEFENC LAWYERS
DEFFENDENT
THE JUDGE
TAKE NOTES FOR FUTURE PROJECTS
PUT EVERYTHING IN, "COMEDY NIGHT LIVE."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
OBSERVATIONS
------------------------
IT'S OVER
IT'S ALL OVER
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT
DONE AND DUSTED
------------------------------------
FAT WOMEN EATING
EATING DONUTS
GOING DUTCH
FIGHTING OVER THE BILL
--------------------------------------------
WAITRESS PRETTY FIT
GOES TO THE GYM
FOR SURE
AFTER WORK
HUSBAND DOESN'T WORK
WAITRESS SUPPORTS HER HUSBAND
A BIG MISTAKE
-----------------------------------------------------
ALWAYS WAS STANDING AT THE THRESHOLD
OF HIS FORTUNES". Mozart
-------------------------------------------------
"ABANDON EVERYTHING
AALL GREED
ALL JEALOUSY
COMPETION
ALL MISERY
THEN BEGIN ONLY WITH THE
GREAT DESIRE AND GREAT PASSION." BS
-----------------------------------------------------------
"ATTEMPT AND NOT THE RESULT
SHOULD BE THE GOAL." BS
----------------------------------------------------
YOU SHOULD LOVE YOUR WORK
AND HAVE CON
CONVICTION OF YOUR TALENT
__________________________________
MOZART
"ILL AND FULL OF GRIEF"
"I AM AT THE MOMENT SO UTTERLY PENNILESS. 1790, DIED IN 1791
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
JUST FORGET IT
LET IT GO
LET IT GO
WHATEVER IT IS
JUST LET IT GO. BS
-----------------------------------------------
GRIEF
DELAYS
RECOVERY
RECOVERY OF ALL KINDS..BS
--------------------------------------------
"AT PRESENT I AM IN WANT" ?
---------------------------------------------
"UNHAPPY PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY
THAT NO ONE IS HAPPY." BS
-------------------------------------------------
"ABANDON YOURSELF?
NOT A GOOD IDEA
----------------------------------------
"NOW A STICK IS MORE SEXY
NOT THE BIG SEXY BEHIND OF MARILYN MONROE" BS
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"HE DIED FOR ME." Joyce, from the dead
----------------------------------------------------------
"INSATIABLE PASSION
TO SEE AND FEEL". Baudelaire
----------------------------------------------------
"NOTHING IS UNIQUE
EXCEPT THE TRANSITORY". ?
----------------------------------------------
BAUDELAIRE ASSOCIATE BEAUTY
NOT ONLY WITH THE STANGE
BUT WITH MELANCHOLY AND
HORROR AS WELL
------------------------------------------
N TRAIN TO CORTLAND STREET
----------------------------------------------
"ILLUMINATIONS AND OTHER
PROSE POEMS BY RIMBAUD
------------------------------------------
I WAS ENJOYING MY READING
AND THEN SHE CAME
AND CHATTED LOUDLY ON HER PHONE
FOR AN HOUR
PART OF THE AFTER NOON COMPLETELY WASTED.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I WAS READING,
ILLUMINATIONS AND OTHER PROSE
POEMS BY RIMBAUD
-------------------------------------------------
I WILL GO BACK TO IT TOMORROW
CAN'T CONCENTRATE WITH HER SHOUTING
IN MY EARS.
---------------------------------------------------------
ILLUMINATIONS
AND
OTHER PROSE POEMS
BY
RIMBAUD
"IT WOULD TAKE LONGER
FOR THE TURN OF KINDNESS
TO COME AGAIN."
"AMOROUS SADNESS OF THE NIGHT."
"AS FOR ME I WAS ABANDONED
WITHOUT END."
"BUT YOU WILL JUST END UP
SELF SATISFIED WITHOUT HAVING
DONE ANYTHING, NOT HAVING WANTED
TO DO ANYTHING."
"HIS SOUL AND HIS HEART,
ALL HIS STRENGTH, WERE
TAKEN UP WITH ABERRATIONS,
STRANGE AND SAD."
"WHO WILL RECALL THE
CONTINUOUS SLEEP OF THE LEGENDARY
MOHAMMEDANS, BRAVE THOUGH
AND CIRCUMCISED."
"SO ANGUISHED FILLED ME."
"A NAMELESS ANGUISH."
---------------------------------------------
"PLEASE GET IT OUT OF YOUR HEAD
THE ANGUISH." BS
--------------------------------
"AND YET ALWAYS
MY EXHAUSTION RETUNED."
"SHE BELONGED TO HER
EVERYDAY LIFE."
---------------------------------------
"ESSENTIAL TO EXIST." BS
--------------------------------------
"SHE IS NOT INTO ANY OTHER
PHILOSOPHY OF LOVE OR PROTOCOL
OF DECENCY OR REFINEMENT."
"IT WOULD TAKE LONGER FOR
THE TURN OF KINDNESS TO COME AGAIN"
--------------------------------------------------------
"GET YOUR HEAD CLEANSED OF
ALL THIS USELESS NONSENSE AND
READ RIMBAUD.".....BS
-----------------------------------------------
DID NOTHING THE REST OF THE DAY."
------------------------------------------------------- BS
"GO BACK TO THE PROSE POEMS OF RIMBAUD. BS.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
"AS FOR ME
I WAS ABANDONED
WITHOUT END."
"AMOROUS SADNESS OF THE NIGHT."
"THE STUPIDEST,
ROTTEN,
MEANEST...
I SERVE UP TO THEM."
"BUT YOU WILL JUST END UP SELF-SATISFIED
WITHOUT HAVING DONE ANYTHING,
NOT HAVING WANTED TO DO ANYTHING."
"I WANT TO BE A POET,
AND I AM WORKING TO MAKE
MYSELF A VISIONARY.
TO ARRIVE AT THE UN-KNOWN
THROUGH THE DISORDERING
OF ALL THE SENSES.
TE SUFFERING WILL BE TREMENDOUS
BUT ONE MUST BE STRONG, BE BORN
A POET, IT IS IN A WAY MY FAULT."
"I IS SOMEONE ELSE"
"I WITNESS THE BIRTH OF MY THOUGHTS,
I LOOK AT IT. I LISTEN TO IT."
"THE FIRST STUDY FOR A MAN WHO
WANTS TO BE A POET
IS THE ENTIRE KNOWLEDGE OF HIMSELF"
"ONE MUST, I SAY BE A VISIONARY,
MAKE ONESELF A VISIONARY."
"YOUR INVENTIONS SHOULD BE
SMELLED,
FELT,
AND
HEARD."
"UNNAMEABLE,
UNUTTERABLE,
INNUMBERABLE
THINGS."
"PERFUMES,
SOUNDS,
COLORS,
THOUGHS,
GRAPPLING THOUGHT
AND PULLING."
"WHEN THE INFINITE
SERVITUDE OF WOMEN
SHALL HAVE ENDED,
WHEN SHE WILL BE
TO LIVE BY AND FOR HERSELF.
THEN,MAN-HITHERTO ABOMINABLE
HAVING GIVEN HER HER FREEDOM,
SHE TOO WILL BE A POET."
"UNE SAISON EN ENFER
'A SEASON IN HELL."
"A HEART BREAKING CONFESSION
NOT OF FAITH BUT OF FAILURE." (from une saison en enfer"
"ONE DOES NOT FINISH
ONE ABANDONS>"
"SINCE HE CULTIVATED HIS SOUL
RICHER TO BEGIN WITH THAN ANY OTHER."
"DRAGGED FROM CAFE
TO SCHOOL ROOM-
ONE IS FINISHED." ?
"NATIVE DEVIOUSNESS". (Verlains ?)
"FINAL REPUDIATION OF HIS PAST
AND A SIGN OF GRACE." ?
----------------------------------------------------
"HOW CAN YOU FLIRT OVER BEER?" BS
A:
"I SHOULD GO FOR A WALK
IT WILL DO ME GOOD.
B:
"ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?"
A:
"NOT SO SURE-BUT CAN'T CAUSE
MORE HARM THAN SITTING." BS
C:
"DON'T BE SILLY
D:
"WHY NOT?
C:
WHAT'S THE POINT TO BE SILLY?
D:
"WHAT'S THE POINT NOT TO BE." BS
E:
ACTUALLY I WAS JUST LEAVING"
F
"GOING FOR A WALK?
E:
NO, ACTUALLY NOT.
TOO MUCH EFFORT TO
GET TO THE RIVER." BS
"OH! MY GOD!
OH! MY GOOD LORD!
HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL." BS
"CAUGHT SOMETHING...
SOMETHING .....
VAGUE
BUT SOMETHING." BS
"WHO KNOWS...
WHO KNOWS...
NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT A MINUTE
OF THEIR FUTURE " BS
"A HEART BREAKING CONFESSION OF FAILURE." BS
"MY DAY, TODAY WAS TOO MUCH.
I HOPE IT HAS PSSED...
NOT YET-----NOT YET." BS
"NOTHING IS REAL EXCEPT HUNGER." BS
WEARINESS DRAGS ME DOWN" BS
"GLENDA JACKSON GAVE UP ACTING.
"ITS ENOUGH."
SHE SAID." BS
"I DON'T EXACTLY KNOW
WHAT SHE SAID...
BUT I THINK THATS EXACTLY
WHAT SHE SAID.
"ITS ENOUGH."
THATS WHTA SHE SAID"
----------------------------------------------
LISTEN, NO-NO-NO YOU ARE
NOT MENTALLY ILL---I AM. BS
----------------------------------------------
MARAT SADE
"THE GUTTER IS DEEP AND RED." P WEISS
"CLIMB UP
CLIMB UP
AND RIDE ALONG WITH ME." PW
"BUT SHE NEVER SAID,
A WORD
NEVER TURNED HER HEAD." PW
"SACRIFICE PEOPLE MADE
TO KEEP YOU FAT." PW
"LOOTED LIVES-
SECRET DEALS." PW
"BASIS OF ALL LIFE IS DEATH." PW
"NATURE HERSELF WOULD WATCH
UNMOVED-
IF WE DESTROYED THE ENTIRE
HUMAN RACE." PW
"THIS PASSIONLESS SPECTATOR,
THIS UNBREAKABLE ICEBERG FACE." PW
"IMAGE OF THEIR HELPLESSNESS
IMAGE OF CHRIST." PW
"POST REVOLUTIONARY MURDERS." PW
"SUFFER, FOR IT;S THE WILL OF GOD." PW
"IMPORTANT THING IS TO PULL YOURSELF
UP BY YOUR OWN HAIR." PW
"TURN YOURSELF ISIDE OUT." PW
"PRAY FOR THOSE
WHO TORTURE YOU." PW
"NO CAUSE, NO SACRIFICE
ONLY YOU
YOURSELF." PW
"BEFORE DECIDING WHAT IS WRONG
AND WHAT IS RIGHT---WE MUST FIND OUT
WHAT WE ARE." PW
"WHAT WE DO IS JUST A SHADOW
OF WHAT WE WANT TO DO." PW
--------------------------------------------
"MOVING FORWARD
TOWARDS WHAT?" BS
"WHERE ARE WE GOING?
UPTOWN
TO DO WHAT?
JUST TO GO UPTOWN." BS
A:
"HOW EXTREMELY DEPRESSED CAN YOU GET?
B:
PLEASE CREATE SOME LIMITS
OF DEPRESSION.
AFTER A CERTAIN DEGREE
YOU HAVE TO STOP YOURSELF
TO GO THERE. YOU MIGHT NEVER COME BACK. BS
"HATRED?
SELF PITY
HATRED OF SELF PITY....
DO USELESS STUFF
BETTER THAN SELF PITY AND HATRED
DO USELESS STUFF
EVENTUALLY EVERYTHING IS USELESS." BS
"WHAT A WASTE OF LOVE." BS
"LOVE WASTED...WASTED...WASTE OF LOVE
LOVE AND IT'S EVENTUAL WASTE." BS
"EVENTUALITY OF LOVE, LONELINESS,
BIG WORLD, BIG LONELINESS." BS
"ARE WE DOING ANYTHING?" BS
"CONTEMPORARY, SECULAR WESTERNS
PERHAPS THE MOST DELUDED MORTALS
ON THE PLANET." ?
"ONE REASON WE TURN TO ART IS
FOR CONTACT WITH OUR DEEPEST REALITIES." ?
______________________________________________
I HAVE TO GO TO A CAFE TO THINK. BS
I WATCHED BROKE BACK MOUNTAIN LAST NIGHT
"LURE OF THE WEST
ATTACHMENT TO HOME
FAMILY
AND
LOVE OF SPICE" (CONFLICT HAS BEEN CREATED ALREADY). BS
"ONE PART OF LIFE IS FREEDOM
THE OTHER PART IS LOVE OF FAMILY
WARMTH OF THE YOUR OWN HOME
FREEDOM ALONE CHOKE YOU OBLIVION
WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE THE OTHER PART OF LIFE...
WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE UNFREE
OR THE PART YOU THOUGHT WAS, "UNFREE"
AT THAT TIME.
"VALUE OF A LIFE OF SENSATIONS." ANNONYMUS
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
UGLY DRAWING
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?
WHAT DOES THE DRAWING MEANS?
WHO KNOWS
IT'S PRETTY UGLY
I KNOW---I AM INTO UGLY ART THESE DAYS
----------------------------------------------------------------
SHE IS A HOST OF A COMEDY SHOW
SHE INVITES GUESTS ON HER SHOW
GUESTS IMITATES STARS
SUCH AS JERRY LEWIS
JACKI MASON
THOMAS MITCHELL
RICHARD BURTON
NIGHT SCENES:
NIGHTNARES
PRESENCE OF SNAKES
KNIVES
SWORDS
PISTOLS
THREATENING
FATALISTIC NIGHTMARES
COMEDY SHOW HOST IS A CULTURAL CRITIC
DOES A MONOLOGUE ON, "INTERNET DATING"
ORGANIC FOOD
COMMODITY ORGANIC FOOD STORE
GET YOUR MONEY BACK
THE FOOD IS NOT ORGANIC
CHICKEN VERY SMELLY
GO GET THE CREDIT
COOKING
EATING
GO TO DO THE COMEDY SHOW
TRYING TO BE HEALTHY TOD OTHE COMEDY SHOW
BUT NO COMEDY SHOW HAPPENS
ONLY THE NIGHTMARES OF THE NIGHT
INVITATION TO DREAMS
DREAMS TURNING INTO NIGHTMARES
"A MEMORY PLAY"
BY
BINA SHRAIF
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MURDERS
HUSBANDS KILLING WIVES
WIVES KILLING CHILDREN
STUDENTS KILLING STUDENTS
FATHERS KILLING SONS
FATHER KILLING ALL THE CHILDREN,
THE WIFE
AND THEN HIMSELF."
THE END.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
THAT'S CALLED, COMEDY NIGHT LIVE"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
CAFE
NEWS PAPERS
TEA
READ ABOUT THE CURRENT MURDERS
TAKE NOTES FOR FUTURE PROJECTS
HAVE EXPRESSO
TRIALS
PROSECUTORS
DEFENC LAWYERS
DEFFENDENT
THE JUDGE
TAKE NOTES FOR FUTURE PROJECTS
PUT EVERYTHING IN, "COMEDY NIGHT LIVE."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
OBSERVATIONS
------------------------
IT'S OVER
IT'S ALL OVER
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT
DONE AND DUSTED
------------------------------------
FAT WOMEN EATING
EATING DONUTS
GOING DUTCH
FIGHTING OVER THE BILL
--------------------------------------------
WAITRESS PRETTY FIT
GOES TO THE GYM
FOR SURE
AFTER WORK
HUSBAND DOESN'T WORK
WAITRESS SUPPORTS HER HUSBAND
A BIG MISTAKE
-----------------------------------------------------
ALWAYS WAS STANDING AT THE THRESHOLD
OF HIS FORTUNES". Mozart
-------------------------------------------------
"ABANDON EVERYTHING
AALL GREED
ALL JEALOUSY
COMPETION
ALL MISERY
THEN BEGIN ONLY WITH THE
GREAT DESIRE AND GREAT PASSION." BS
-----------------------------------------------------------
"ATTEMPT AND NOT THE RESULT
SHOULD BE THE GOAL." BS
----------------------------------------------------
YOU SHOULD LOVE YOUR WORK
AND HAVE CON
CONVICTION OF YOUR TALENT
__________________________________
MOZART
"ILL AND FULL OF GRIEF"
"I AM AT THE MOMENT SO UTTERLY PENNILESS. 1790, DIED IN 1791
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
JUST FORGET IT
LET IT GO
LET IT GO
WHATEVER IT IS
JUST LET IT GO. BS
-----------------------------------------------
GRIEF
DELAYS
RECOVERY
RECOVERY OF ALL KINDS..BS
--------------------------------------------
"AT PRESENT I AM IN WANT" ?
---------------------------------------------
"UNHAPPY PEOPLE ALWAYS SAY
THAT NO ONE IS HAPPY." BS
-------------------------------------------------
"ABANDON YOURSELF?
NOT A GOOD IDEA
----------------------------------------
"NOW A STICK IS MORE SEXY
NOT THE BIG SEXY BEHIND OF MARILYN MONROE" BS
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"HE DIED FOR ME." Joyce, from the dead
----------------------------------------------------------
"INSATIABLE PASSION
TO SEE AND FEEL". Baudelaire
----------------------------------------------------
"NOTHING IS UNIQUE
EXCEPT THE TRANSITORY". ?
----------------------------------------------
BAUDELAIRE ASSOCIATE BEAUTY
NOT ONLY WITH THE STANGE
BUT WITH MELANCHOLY AND
HORROR AS WELL
------------------------------------------
N TRAIN TO CORTLAND STREET
----------------------------------------------
"ILLUMINATIONS AND OTHER
PROSE POEMS BY RIMBAUD
------------------------------------------
I WAS ENJOYING MY READING
AND THEN SHE CAME
AND CHATTED LOUDLY ON HER PHONE
FOR AN HOUR
PART OF THE AFTER NOON COMPLETELY WASTED.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I WAS READING,
ILLUMINATIONS AND OTHER PROSE
POEMS BY RIMBAUD
-------------------------------------------------
I WILL GO BACK TO IT TOMORROW
CAN'T CONCENTRATE WITH HER SHOUTING
IN MY EARS.
---------------------------------------------------------
ILLUMINATIONS
AND
OTHER PROSE POEMS
BY
RIMBAUD
"IT WOULD TAKE LONGER
FOR THE TURN OF KINDNESS
TO COME AGAIN."
"AMOROUS SADNESS OF THE NIGHT."
"AS FOR ME I WAS ABANDONED
WITHOUT END."
"BUT YOU WILL JUST END UP
SELF SATISFIED WITHOUT HAVING
DONE ANYTHING, NOT HAVING WANTED
TO DO ANYTHING."
"HIS SOUL AND HIS HEART,
ALL HIS STRENGTH, WERE
TAKEN UP WITH ABERRATIONS,
STRANGE AND SAD."
"WHO WILL RECALL THE
CONTINUOUS SLEEP OF THE LEGENDARY
MOHAMMEDANS, BRAVE THOUGH
AND CIRCUMCISED."
"SO ANGUISHED FILLED ME."
"A NAMELESS ANGUISH."
---------------------------------------------
"PLEASE GET IT OUT OF YOUR HEAD
THE ANGUISH." BS
--------------------------------
"AND YET ALWAYS
MY EXHAUSTION RETUNED."
"SHE BELONGED TO HER
EVERYDAY LIFE."
---------------------------------------
"ESSENTIAL TO EXIST." BS
--------------------------------------
"SHE IS NOT INTO ANY OTHER
PHILOSOPHY OF LOVE OR PROTOCOL
OF DECENCY OR REFINEMENT."
"IT WOULD TAKE LONGER FOR
THE TURN OF KINDNESS TO COME AGAIN"
--------------------------------------------------------
"GET YOUR HEAD CLEANSED OF
ALL THIS USELESS NONSENSE AND
READ RIMBAUD.".....BS
-----------------------------------------------
DID NOTHING THE REST OF THE DAY."
------------------------------------------------------- BS
"GO BACK TO THE PROSE POEMS OF RIMBAUD. BS.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
"AS FOR ME
I WAS ABANDONED
WITHOUT END."
"AMOROUS SADNESS OF THE NIGHT."
"THE STUPIDEST,
ROTTEN,
MEANEST...
I SERVE UP TO THEM."
"BUT YOU WILL JUST END UP SELF-SATISFIED
WITHOUT HAVING DONE ANYTHING,
NOT HAVING WANTED TO DO ANYTHING."
"I WANT TO BE A POET,
AND I AM WORKING TO MAKE
MYSELF A VISIONARY.
TO ARRIVE AT THE UN-KNOWN
THROUGH THE DISORDERING
OF ALL THE SENSES.
TE SUFFERING WILL BE TREMENDOUS
BUT ONE MUST BE STRONG, BE BORN
A POET, IT IS IN A WAY MY FAULT."
"I IS SOMEONE ELSE"
"I WITNESS THE BIRTH OF MY THOUGHTS,
I LOOK AT IT. I LISTEN TO IT."
"THE FIRST STUDY FOR A MAN WHO
WANTS TO BE A POET
IS THE ENTIRE KNOWLEDGE OF HIMSELF"
"ONE MUST, I SAY BE A VISIONARY,
MAKE ONESELF A VISIONARY."
"YOUR INVENTIONS SHOULD BE
SMELLED,
FELT,
AND
HEARD."
"UNNAMEABLE,
UNUTTERABLE,
INNUMBERABLE
THINGS."
"PERFUMES,
SOUNDS,
COLORS,
THOUGHS,
GRAPPLING THOUGHT
AND PULLING."
"WHEN THE INFINITE
SERVITUDE OF WOMEN
SHALL HAVE ENDED,
WHEN SHE WILL BE
TO LIVE BY AND FOR HERSELF.
THEN,MAN-HITHERTO ABOMINABLE
HAVING GIVEN HER HER FREEDOM,
SHE TOO WILL BE A POET."
"UNE SAISON EN ENFER
'A SEASON IN HELL."
"A HEART BREAKING CONFESSION
NOT OF FAITH BUT OF FAILURE." (from une saison en enfer"
"ONE DOES NOT FINISH
ONE ABANDONS>"
"SINCE HE CULTIVATED HIS SOUL
RICHER TO BEGIN WITH THAN ANY OTHER."
"DRAGGED FROM CAFE
TO SCHOOL ROOM-
ONE IS FINISHED." ?
"NATIVE DEVIOUSNESS". (Verlains ?)
"FINAL REPUDIATION OF HIS PAST
AND A SIGN OF GRACE." ?
----------------------------------------------------
"HOW CAN YOU FLIRT OVER BEER?" BS
A:
"I SHOULD GO FOR A WALK
IT WILL DO ME GOOD.
B:
"ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?"
A:
"NOT SO SURE-BUT CAN'T CAUSE
MORE HARM THAN SITTING." BS
C:
"DON'T BE SILLY
D:
"WHY NOT?
C:
WHAT'S THE POINT TO BE SILLY?
D:
"WHAT'S THE POINT NOT TO BE." BS
E:
ACTUALLY I WAS JUST LEAVING"
F
"GOING FOR A WALK?
E:
NO, ACTUALLY NOT.
TOO MUCH EFFORT TO
GET TO THE RIVER." BS
"OH! MY GOD!
OH! MY GOOD LORD!
HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL." BS
"CAUGHT SOMETHING...
SOMETHING .....
VAGUE
BUT SOMETHING." BS
"WHO KNOWS...
WHO KNOWS...
NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT A MINUTE
OF THEIR FUTURE " BS
"A HEART BREAKING CONFESSION OF FAILURE." BS
"MY DAY, TODAY WAS TOO MUCH.
I HOPE IT HAS PSSED...
NOT YET-----NOT YET." BS
"NOTHING IS REAL EXCEPT HUNGER." BS
WEARINESS DRAGS ME DOWN" BS
"GLENDA JACKSON GAVE UP ACTING.
"ITS ENOUGH."
SHE SAID." BS
"I DON'T EXACTLY KNOW
WHAT SHE SAID...
BUT I THINK THATS EXACTLY
WHAT SHE SAID.
"ITS ENOUGH."
THATS WHTA SHE SAID"
----------------------------------------------
LISTEN, NO-NO-NO YOU ARE
NOT MENTALLY ILL---I AM. BS
----------------------------------------------
MARAT SADE
"THE GUTTER IS DEEP AND RED." P WEISS
"CLIMB UP
CLIMB UP
AND RIDE ALONG WITH ME." PW
"BUT SHE NEVER SAID,
A WORD
NEVER TURNED HER HEAD." PW
"SACRIFICE PEOPLE MADE
TO KEEP YOU FAT." PW
"LOOTED LIVES-
SECRET DEALS." PW
"BASIS OF ALL LIFE IS DEATH." PW
"NATURE HERSELF WOULD WATCH
UNMOVED-
IF WE DESTROYED THE ENTIRE
HUMAN RACE." PW
"THIS PASSIONLESS SPECTATOR,
THIS UNBREAKABLE ICEBERG FACE." PW
"IMAGE OF THEIR HELPLESSNESS
IMAGE OF CHRIST." PW
"POST REVOLUTIONARY MURDERS." PW
"SUFFER, FOR IT;S THE WILL OF GOD." PW
"IMPORTANT THING IS TO PULL YOURSELF
UP BY YOUR OWN HAIR." PW
"TURN YOURSELF ISIDE OUT." PW
"PRAY FOR THOSE
WHO TORTURE YOU." PW
"NO CAUSE, NO SACRIFICE
ONLY YOU
YOURSELF." PW
"BEFORE DECIDING WHAT IS WRONG
AND WHAT IS RIGHT---WE MUST FIND OUT
WHAT WE ARE." PW
"WHAT WE DO IS JUST A SHADOW
OF WHAT WE WANT TO DO." PW
--------------------------------------------
"MOVING FORWARD
TOWARDS WHAT?" BS
"WHERE ARE WE GOING?
UPTOWN
TO DO WHAT?
JUST TO GO UPTOWN." BS
A:
"HOW EXTREMELY DEPRESSED CAN YOU GET?
B:
PLEASE CREATE SOME LIMITS
OF DEPRESSION.
AFTER A CERTAIN DEGREE
YOU HAVE TO STOP YOURSELF
TO GO THERE. YOU MIGHT NEVER COME BACK. BS
"HATRED?
SELF PITY
HATRED OF SELF PITY....
DO USELESS STUFF
BETTER THAN SELF PITY AND HATRED
DO USELESS STUFF
EVENTUALLY EVERYTHING IS USELESS." BS
"WHAT A WASTE OF LOVE." BS
"LOVE WASTED...WASTED...WASTE OF LOVE
LOVE AND IT'S EVENTUAL WASTE." BS
"EVENTUALITY OF LOVE, LONELINESS,
BIG WORLD, BIG LONELINESS." BS
"ARE WE DOING ANYTHING?" BS
"CONTEMPORARY, SECULAR WESTERNS
PERHAPS THE MOST DELUDED MORTALS
ON THE PLANET." ?
"ONE REASON WE TURN TO ART IS
FOR CONTACT WITH OUR DEEPEST REALITIES." ?
______________________________________________
Sunday, March 22, 2020
I MISS YOU
I MISS YOU
EVERY DAY I SAY
I MISS YOU...
I WILL COME AND VISIT YOU
EVERY DAY I BREAK MY PROMISE
THEN I SAY AGAIN
"I MISS YOU"
'I WILL COME TO YOU"
EVERY DAY I BREAK MY PROMISE
I HAVE A PROBLEM
LACK OF DISCIPLINE
ACTUALLY
NO DISCIPLINE AT ALL...
THEN WHY DO I SAY
EVERY DAY
THAT I WILL VISIT YOU?
BECAUSE I WANT TO...
THEN WHY NOT DO WHAT
I SAY
I DON'T KNOW
I REALLY DON'T
JUST TO STRESS MYSELF
I GUESS
BUT NOT KEEPING MY WORD
GIVES ME MORE STRESS
STRESS WILL MAKE ME SICK
YES, I GOT SICK
HAVE BEEN SICK
FOR 12 DAYS
NO, NOT CORONAVIRUS
THANK GOD
IT'S THE SICKNESS
OF THE MIND
LACK OF
WILL POWER
YES, THATS IT
LACK, LACK, LACK...
LACK OF WILL POWER
LACK OF ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOR
NEED TO SUFFER
UN-NECESSARILY
I DO COME
TO YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD
I DO THINK OF
SEEING YOU
BUT THEN I GET
EXHAUSTED
FROM MY OWN MIND
AND GO BACK
AND DO SOMETHING ELSE
SOMETHING MEANINGLESS
JUST LIKE
THE MORNING
I SPEND IN YOUR AREA
AND NEVER KNOCKED
AT YOUR DOOR
THEN PROMISED MYSELF
I WILL DO IT TOMORROW
THE MOMENT I AM NEAR YOU
I WILL VISIT YOU...
THEN I DON'T DO IT
I WONDER WHAT'S
WRONG WITH ME?
WHAT EVER I WANT TO DO...
I DON'T DO
THAT IS NOT
ONLY SAD
BUT DISTURBING
VERY DISTURBING
EITHER I SHOULD STOP
WISHING TO SEE YOU
CHAT WITH YOU
EXPRESS MY THOUGHTS
WITH YOU
OR I SHOULD
DO WHAT I SAY
CALL ON YOU
IT SEEMS LIKE
AN EMERGENY
BUT STILL I FAIL
SOMETHING IS WRONG
I WONDER...
YES, DARLING
SOMETHING IS VERY WRONG
STOP IT
JUST STOP IT
YOU ARE SMARTER
THAN THAT
IS THIS A GAME
YOU ARE PLAYING?
WHO ARE YOU PLAYING
WITH?
WHO ARE YOU
PLAYING
AGAINST?
WHO?
AGAINST YOUR SELF
YOU ARE IN A BATTLE
AGAINST
YOURSELF
WHAT HAPPENED?
HOW DID YOU
LOSE CONTROL?
OR YOU NEVER HAD IT
CONTROL I MEAN
NEVER HAD CONTROL
PESSIMISTIC EMOTIONS
IS THE CAUSE
THEN STOPP WISHING
STOP THE YEARNING
CAN'T
WHY NOT?
YEARNING IS THE ONLY
POSITIVE THING I HAVE
WITHOUT YEARNING
I WILL DIE
FULFILL YOUR PROMISE
TO YOUR SELF
FOR SELF RESPECT
TO YOURSELF
YOU WILL LIVE
MUCH LONGER
HAPPIER
THAN EVER...
YES, I WANT
TO BE HAPPY
I WANT TO VISIT
YOU...
MAYBE?
TOMORROW
I WILL
MAYBE?
PROMISE?
NO...
PROMISES ARE NEVER KEPT
BY ME...
NOT REALLY TRUE
I DO KEEP MY PROMISES
ONLY WITH
YOU I HAVE
SOME CONFLICTS
OF SOME KIND
UNRESOLVED
BUT ATTACHED LIKE A KNOT...
TO MY GUT
GIVES ME JOLTS
OF DISRESPECT
I AM WEEK
BUT I AM STONG
AS WELL
SOME KIND OF FEAR
COMES IN THE WAY
BLOCKS MY DESIRE
EVERY DAY
I HAVE THE DESIRE
EVERY DAY...
I DON'T RUSH
TO FULFILL IT
PEOPLE DO
WHAT EVER THEY SAY
I HARDLY
KEEP UP
WITH MYSELF
IN CERTAIN WAYS
I STAND
IN MY WAY
I AM FARIAD
NO, NOT OF YOU
NO, NOT AT ALL
I AM VERY FOND OF YOU
I KNOW
IT WILL ...
BRING ME SOME
KIND OF PEACE
SOME KIND OF
HAPPINESS
MAYBE, I AM AFRAID
OF HAPPINESS
BUT I AM NOT...
I AM JUST
STANDING STILL
WISHING...WISHING
HOPING...HOPING
TO COME TO YOU
TOMORROW...
YES,
TOMORROW
TOMORROW...
TOMORROW
I WILL VISIT
YOU
TOMORROW
I PROMISE
IT'S GOOD FOR ME
TO VISIT YOU
TOMORROW
TOMORROW I WILL
I PROMISE...
TOMORROW
WILL BRING
ME TO YOU
AND
FROM THEN ON...
I WILL VISIT YOU
EVERY DAY...
EVERY DAY...
EVERYDAY
WITHOUT FAIL...
BECAUSE
I MISS YOU
I MISS YOU
I MISS YOU SWEETHEART...
EVERY DAY I SAY
I MISS YOU...
I WILL COME AND VISIT YOU
EVERY DAY I BREAK MY PROMISE
THEN I SAY AGAIN
"I MISS YOU"
'I WILL COME TO YOU"
EVERY DAY I BREAK MY PROMISE
I HAVE A PROBLEM
LACK OF DISCIPLINE
ACTUALLY
NO DISCIPLINE AT ALL...
THEN WHY DO I SAY
EVERY DAY
THAT I WILL VISIT YOU?
BECAUSE I WANT TO...
THEN WHY NOT DO WHAT
I SAY
I DON'T KNOW
I REALLY DON'T
JUST TO STRESS MYSELF
I GUESS
BUT NOT KEEPING MY WORD
GIVES ME MORE STRESS
STRESS WILL MAKE ME SICK
YES, I GOT SICK
HAVE BEEN SICK
FOR 12 DAYS
NO, NOT CORONAVIRUS
THANK GOD
IT'S THE SICKNESS
OF THE MIND
LACK OF
WILL POWER
YES, THATS IT
LACK, LACK, LACK...
LACK OF WILL POWER
LACK OF ASSERTIVE BEHAVIOR
NEED TO SUFFER
UN-NECESSARILY
I DO COME
TO YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD
I DO THINK OF
SEEING YOU
BUT THEN I GET
EXHAUSTED
FROM MY OWN MIND
AND GO BACK
AND DO SOMETHING ELSE
SOMETHING MEANINGLESS
JUST LIKE
THE MORNING
I SPEND IN YOUR AREA
AND NEVER KNOCKED
AT YOUR DOOR
THEN PROMISED MYSELF
I WILL DO IT TOMORROW
THE MOMENT I AM NEAR YOU
I WILL VISIT YOU...
THEN I DON'T DO IT
I WONDER WHAT'S
WRONG WITH ME?
WHAT EVER I WANT TO DO...
I DON'T DO
THAT IS NOT
ONLY SAD
BUT DISTURBING
VERY DISTURBING
EITHER I SHOULD STOP
WISHING TO SEE YOU
CHAT WITH YOU
EXPRESS MY THOUGHTS
WITH YOU
OR I SHOULD
DO WHAT I SAY
CALL ON YOU
IT SEEMS LIKE
AN EMERGENY
BUT STILL I FAIL
SOMETHING IS WRONG
I WONDER...
YES, DARLING
SOMETHING IS VERY WRONG
STOP IT
JUST STOP IT
YOU ARE SMARTER
THAN THAT
IS THIS A GAME
YOU ARE PLAYING?
WHO ARE YOU PLAYING
WITH?
WHO ARE YOU
PLAYING
AGAINST?
WHO?
AGAINST YOUR SELF
YOU ARE IN A BATTLE
AGAINST
YOURSELF
WHAT HAPPENED?
HOW DID YOU
LOSE CONTROL?
OR YOU NEVER HAD IT
CONTROL I MEAN
NEVER HAD CONTROL
PESSIMISTIC EMOTIONS
IS THE CAUSE
THEN STOPP WISHING
STOP THE YEARNING
CAN'T
WHY NOT?
YEARNING IS THE ONLY
POSITIVE THING I HAVE
WITHOUT YEARNING
I WILL DIE
FULFILL YOUR PROMISE
TO YOUR SELF
FOR SELF RESPECT
TO YOURSELF
YOU WILL LIVE
MUCH LONGER
HAPPIER
THAN EVER...
YES, I WANT
TO BE HAPPY
I WANT TO VISIT
YOU...
MAYBE?
TOMORROW
I WILL
MAYBE?
PROMISE?
NO...
PROMISES ARE NEVER KEPT
BY ME...
NOT REALLY TRUE
I DO KEEP MY PROMISES
ONLY WITH
YOU I HAVE
SOME CONFLICTS
OF SOME KIND
UNRESOLVED
BUT ATTACHED LIKE A KNOT...
TO MY GUT
GIVES ME JOLTS
OF DISRESPECT
I AM WEEK
BUT I AM STONG
AS WELL
SOME KIND OF FEAR
COMES IN THE WAY
BLOCKS MY DESIRE
EVERY DAY
I HAVE THE DESIRE
EVERY DAY...
I DON'T RUSH
TO FULFILL IT
PEOPLE DO
WHAT EVER THEY SAY
I HARDLY
KEEP UP
WITH MYSELF
IN CERTAIN WAYS
I STAND
IN MY WAY
I AM FARIAD
NO, NOT OF YOU
NO, NOT AT ALL
I AM VERY FOND OF YOU
I KNOW
IT WILL ...
BRING ME SOME
KIND OF PEACE
SOME KIND OF
HAPPINESS
MAYBE, I AM AFRAID
OF HAPPINESS
BUT I AM NOT...
I AM JUST
STANDING STILL
WISHING...WISHING
HOPING...HOPING
TO COME TO YOU
TOMORROW...
YES,
TOMORROW
TOMORROW...
TOMORROW
I WILL VISIT
YOU
TOMORROW
I PROMISE
IT'S GOOD FOR ME
TO VISIT YOU
TOMORROW
TOMORROW I WILL
I PROMISE...
TOMORROW
WILL BRING
ME TO YOU
AND
FROM THEN ON...
I WILL VISIT YOU
EVERY DAY...
EVERY DAY...
EVERYDAY
WITHOUT FAIL...
BECAUSE
I MISS YOU
I MISS YOU
I MISS YOU SWEETHEART...
Friday, March 6, 2020
SYBIL'S DESPAIR PART 5
SYBIL'S DESPAIR PART 5
A NEW PLAY
BY BINA SHARIF
AT THEATER FOR THE NEW CITY
SEPT 17 TILL OCT 4 2020
THURSDAY---SATURDAY 8PM
SUNDAY 3PM
CHARACTERS
SYBIL
THERAPIST NI 1
THERAPIST NO 2
THERAPIST NO 3
TIME PRESENT
PLACE: NYC
FIRST SCENE
ACTORS IN BLACK OUT WITH TORCH LIGHTS WANDERING AROUND AS IF LOOKING FOR SOMETHING
VIVALDI MUSIC IS PLAYING
THEY ROAM AROUND FOR A WHILE, THEN COME INTO THE CENTER IN A SEMI CIRCLE AND FLASH LIGHTS ON EACH OTHER'S FACES AND SEEING ALIENS
LOOK ALIKE SCREAM LOUD AND LONG WITH FEAR...
THEY LEAVE
SCENE ;2
PROLOGUE: SYBIL CENTER STAGE, SPOT LIGHT
"DEAD PEOPLE, "WHEN I WAS ALIVE I WENT TO MANY MANY THERAPISTS BESIDE HAVING MANY OTHER MISHAPS BUT NOTHING REALLY WORKED.
SCENE: 3
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO :1
SCENE : 4
SYBIL'S DREAM: SYBIL CENTER STAGE, SPOT LIGHT
SCENE: 5
HARVARD YARD: SYBIL AND SAMMY
SCENE: 6
ANOTHER ACTOR'S DREAM
SCENE: 7
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO : 2
SCENE; 7
ANOTHER DREAM BY ANOTHER ACTOR
SCENE: 8
ANOTHER HAPPY DAY: SYBIL AND SAMMY
SCENE: 9
A SHORT DREAM BY ANOTHER ACTOR
SCENE: 10
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO:3
END OF PLAY?
A NEW PLAY
BY BINA SHARIF
AT THEATER FOR THE NEW CITY
SEPT 17 TILL OCT 4 2020
THURSDAY---SATURDAY 8PM
SUNDAY 3PM
CHARACTERS
SYBIL
THERAPIST NI 1
THERAPIST NO 2
THERAPIST NO 3
TIME PRESENT
PLACE: NYC
FIRST SCENE
ACTORS IN BLACK OUT WITH TORCH LIGHTS WANDERING AROUND AS IF LOOKING FOR SOMETHING
VIVALDI MUSIC IS PLAYING
THEY ROAM AROUND FOR A WHILE, THEN COME INTO THE CENTER IN A SEMI CIRCLE AND FLASH LIGHTS ON EACH OTHER'S FACES AND SEEING ALIENS
LOOK ALIKE SCREAM LOUD AND LONG WITH FEAR...
THEY LEAVE
SCENE ;2
PROLOGUE: SYBIL CENTER STAGE, SPOT LIGHT
"DEAD PEOPLE, "WHEN I WAS ALIVE I WENT TO MANY MANY THERAPISTS BESIDE HAVING MANY OTHER MISHAPS BUT NOTHING REALLY WORKED.
SCENE: 3
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO :1
SCENE : 4
SYBIL'S DREAM: SYBIL CENTER STAGE, SPOT LIGHT
SCENE: 5
HARVARD YARD: SYBIL AND SAMMY
SCENE: 6
ANOTHER ACTOR'S DREAM
SCENE: 7
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO : 2
SCENE; 7
ANOTHER DREAM BY ANOTHER ACTOR
SCENE: 8
ANOTHER HAPPY DAY: SYBIL AND SAMMY
SCENE: 9
A SHORT DREAM BY ANOTHER ACTOR
SCENE: 10
SYBIL AND THERAPIST NO:3
END OF PLAY?
Wednesday, March 4, 2020
MORNINGS AND EVENINGS
MORNINGS AND EVENINGS
PROBLEMS
SELF CREATED
LACK OF WILL POWER
SELF DESTRUCTIVE INSTINCTS
DESPAIR
DEEP, DEEP DESPAIR OF AN UNKNOWN ORIGIN
WAKING UP WITH A HEAVY HEART
GOING TO BED WITH A HEAVY HEART
CAUSE?
UNKNOWN
UNKNOWN TO ME
BUT MY HEART SINKS
IN THE MORNING AND IN THE EVENING
CAUSE
UNKNOWN
UNKNOWN TO ME
FEAR
FEAR OF SOMETHING
THAT SOMETHING NOT KNOWN
NOT KNOWN TO ME
NEED TO GET OUT IN THE MORNING
RIGHT AWAY GET OUT
TO GET SOME FRESH AIR
TO WALK
TO THINK
TO NOT LET THAT SINKING HEART OVERPOWER ME
NEED TO GET OUT, TAKE A WALK IN THE EVENING
NOT TO LET THAT SINKING FEELING GET A HOLD OVER ME
BUT CAN'T SEEM TO DO IT
CAN'T GET OUT RIGHT AWAY IN THE MORNING
EVENING?
HAVEN'T TRIED YET
TRY
TRY TO GO FOR A WALK AROUND THE PARK
IN THE MORNING AND EVENING
FORCE YOURSELF
DO NOT SIT
DO NOT SIT TO LOOK AT THE NEWS ON THE COMPUTER
THE SAME NEWS YOU WATCHED LAST NIGHT WHILE SITTING ON THE SOFA
IT'S FROM THE SOFA TO THE CHAIR
FROM ONE ROOM TO ANOTHER
GET OUT OF THE APT
NOT GOOD TO BE SITTING
AND SITTING FOR SO LONG
ESPECIALLY WITH THAT SINKING FEELING
NO TEA IN THE MORNING
IF THAT CUP OF TEA IS MAKING YOU SIT AND LOOK AT THE NEWS
WHY ARE YOU SO INTERESTED IN AMERICAN NEWS?
WHAT DO THEY DO FOR YOU?
NOTHING
COME TO THINK OF IT
NOTHING
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
THEN WHY DO YOU SO DILIGENTLY WATCH TV?
IN THE MORNING AND EVENING
I DON'T WATCH TV IN THE MORNING
I READ ABOUT THE AMERICAN NEWS ON THE COMPUTER
AND IN THE EVENING I WATCH ON TV
WHY?
WHO KNOWS
YOU NEED TO KNOWTO AVOID SOMETHING ELSE
TO AVOID SOMETHING MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT
EXERCISE PERHAPS
EXERCISE WILL, HELP YOU MORE THAN THE NEWS
FOR SURE
THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET OUT AND WALK IN THE MORNING?
WALK IN THE EVENING?
BECAUSE OF DESPAIR
DESPAIR WILL NEVER GO AWAY
YOU NEED TO GET UP, GET PUT AND LEAVE THE DESPAIR OUT IN THE STREET NEXT TO THE GARBAGE BAGS.
SIDE WALKS ARE FULL OF BLACK GARBAGE BAGS
THROW YOUR DESPAIR NEAR THE GARBAGE AND THE GARBAGE TRUCK
WILL PICK IT UP AND IT WILL BE GONE FOR EVER
NOT THAT EASY
NOT THAT EASY AT ALL
EASY SAID THAN DONE...
IT'S NOT SO HARD
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO GET UP, WEAR YOUR SNEAKERS AND TAKE A WALK
NOT SO EASY
WHY NOT?
WHAT ABOUT THAT CUP OF TEA IN THE MORNING?
WHAT ABOUT IT?
I MAKE THE TEA AND THEN I HAVE TO SIT DOWN TO DRINK IT AND YOU KNOW WHRE I SIT DOWN>?
WHERE?
NEAR THE WINDOW IN THE KITCHEN WHERE MY LAPTAP IS
AND ?
I READ ABOUT THE SAME NEWS WHICH I AM ALREADY AM AWARE OF
BY WATCHING TV ON THE PREVIOUS NIGHT
WHY DO YOU DO THAT?
BECAUSE I HAVE THAT SINKING FEELING OF MY HEART OF THAT UNKNOWN
SCARY DESPAIR
WILL THE DESPAIR GO AWAY BY READING THE NEWS IN THE MORNING?
NEVER
WILL THE DESPAIR GO AWAY BY WATCHING THE NEWS AT NIGHT?
NEVER
THEN WHY DO YOU DO IT?
THAT'S THE PROBLEM
THAT'S A MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION
I DON'T HAVE AN ANSWER
YOU WANT TO BE INCLUDED IN AMERICAN PROCESS
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU ARE HERE, RIGHT?
YOU LIVE IN AMERICA, RIGHT?
YOU ALSO WANT TO BE INVOLVED IN AMERICAN PROCESS
I DON'T WANT TO RUN FOR ELECTION
NOT THAT KIND OF PROCESS
THEN HAT?
YOU WANT TO FEEL THAT YOU ARE PART OF WHAT HAPPENS IN THE COUNTRY YOU LIVE IN...
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT...
YOU WANT TO BE PART OF THINGS CITIZEN'S ARE ALWAYS CONCERNED ABOUT
PERHAPS...
FOR SURE...
THEN WHY THE DESPAIR?
BECAUSE...
WHAT?
REMEMBER, YEARS AGO WHEN YOU CAME HERE AS A STUDENT
AND YOU ALWAYS WORE COLORFUL CLOTHES AND THEY STARTED TO CALL YPOU, "WOMAN OF COLOR?"
I REMEMBER...
YOU TOOK THAT AS A COMPLEMENT BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT IT'S BECAUSE OF YOUR COLORFUL CLOTHES THAT THEY HAVE GIVEN YOU THIS NICK NAME,
"WOMAN OF COLOR." BUT IT WAS NOT BECAUSE OF THAT...
IT WAS THE SIGNAL TO YOU THAT YOU WILL NEVER BE INCLUDED IN THE MAINSTREAM CHOICES AMERICA MAKES, OR IN ANY GROUP OR DEPARTMENT OF INTEREST...IT'S THE WHITE POWER TO CREATE THE NEWS, THE NEWS YOU WATCH,
THE NEWS FROM WHICH YOU ARE EXCLUDED, NEWS OF ALL KIND, POLITICS, ENTERTAINMENT, SOCIAL CLIMBING, EVERYTHING AND ALL THINGS...
THEY TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE A WOMAN OF COLOR...
THAT MEANT THAT AMERICA HAS GIVEN THEMSELVES THE PERMISSION TO EXCLUDE YOU AND EXCLUDE YOU FROM EVERYTHING YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN...PERIOD
AND YOU HAVE NEVER REALLY ABSORBED THAT MESSAGE WHICH WAS HINTED
AT YOU LONG TIME AGO WHEN YOU WERE A STUDENT...
SO UNDERSTAND IT NOW...
BE SO GRATEFUL NOT TO BE INCLUDED
AND TO BE INCLUDED IN ALL LIES, FAKE, DECEPTIVE INFORMATION, PREJUDICED
PROJECTS, FAVORITISM, AND ALL KINDS OF ,"ISMS"
BE SO VERY HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED....
BE THRILLED TO BE EXCLUDED
ACCEPT IT
THE MOMENT YOU ACCEPT YOU ILL STOP WATCHING TV, STOP READING ABOUT THE NEWS ON YOUR LAPTOP IN YOUR KITCHEN AND WON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING ON TV............
AND ALL YOUR SINKING FEELINGS, YOUR UNKNOWN DESPAIR WILL JUST VANISH.
BE HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED
BE PROUD TO BE EXCLUDED
BE GRATEFUL TO BE EXCLUDED
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A LUKE WARM PERSON?
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A WASHED OUT PERSON?
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A SHDOW OF WHITENESS?
YOU ARE A UNIQUE WOMAN
A STRONG WOMAN
A PROUD WOMAN
AN ORIGINAL WOMAN
A CREATIVE WOMAN
A COMPASSIONATE WOMAN
AN HONEST WOMAN
A TALENTED WOMAN
YOU CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE HOW TALENTED YOU ARE
DO YOU KNOW HOW TALENTED YOU ARAE?
DO YOU KNOW HOW BLESSED YOU ARE?
DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE A MAJOR SUPPORT SYSTEM BEHIND YOU?
DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TAKEN CARE OF?
YES, YOU HAVE BEEN
BY THE ALMIGHTY GOD, THE GOOD LORD KEEPS A WATCH ON YOU
YOU ARE SUPPORTED BY THE BIGGEST POWER, YOUR ALMIGHTY GOD, YOUR FAITH, YOUR SENSE OF JUSTICE, YOUR FEEL FOR HUMANITY, YOUR AFFECTION FOR THE ONES LEFT BEHIND, YOUR EMPATHY, YOUR LOVE OF BEAUTY, YOUR LOVE OF POETRY, YOUR APPRECIATION OF GRACE, FOR MERCY, FOR KINDNESS, FOR JUSTICE
TO TOP IT ALL OFF...
ISN'T IT GREAT TO BE EXCLUDED FROM THE INJUSTICE, FROM RACISM, FROM
PREJUDICE, FROM CRIMINALITY, FROM GREED, FROM HATRED?
AND ALL THE NEWS ON TV AND ON THE LAPTOP ARE ABOUT THAT...
SOME ENORMOUS POWER HAS KEPT YOU AWAY FROM THAT CRAP OF FALSEHOOD...
BE THRILLED
BE PROUD
ANNOUNCE YOUR EXCLUSION TO THE WHOLE WORLD AND GET UP
HAVE A CUP OF TEA, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE THAT CUP OF TEA IN THE MORNING WHICH YOU HAD ALL YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU WERE IN YOUR OWN BEAUTIFUL WORLD, YOUR HOME, YOUR HOME COUNTRY WHERE YOU WERE INCLUDED IN EVERY THING, EVERY LITTLE DETAIL WHICH EVERY CITIZEN SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT...YOU HAD YOUR INCLUSION IN A DIFFERENT WORLD,
IN YOUR OWN WORLD...THIS IS NOT YOUR WORLD
YOU JUST HAPPEN TO BE HERE
YOU NEVER WANT TO BE INCLUDED EVEN IF THAI UNJUST WORLD WANT YOU TO BE...
YOU HAVE BEEN PROUDLY INCLUDED IN YOUR OWN WORLD, IN YOUR OWN
HOME COUNTRY...
HERE YOU MUST BE EXCLUDED...
IT'S BETTER FOR YOU TO BE EXCLUDED
YOU ARE TOO GOOD TO BE INCLUDED IN THIS MAKE BELIEVE TRUTH
LIVE WITH YOUR OWN TRUTH...
GO FOR A WALK IN THE MORNING, GO FOR A WALK IN THE EVENING
AND THINK ABOUT YOUR OWN TRUTH, THE TRUTH, THE REAL TRUTH, THE VALUES
WITH WHICH YOU WOULD LOVE TO LIVE WITH INCLUDED OR NOT...
BE PROUD, BE GRATEFUL, BE THANKFUL THAT YOU ARE NOT PART OF THAT GROUP
PART OF ANY GROUP...
YOU ARE YOUR OWN GROUP.
GOD GRANTED THAT POWER TO YOU...
YOU MUST HAPPILY ACCEPT YOUR EXCLUSION AND ONLY THEN YOUR DESPAIR WILL GO AWAY...IT WILL VANISH. I PROMISE YOU.
TRY
TRY GOING FOR A WALK INSTEAD OF READING THE NYT IN THE MORNING
GO FOR A WALK INSTED OF WATCHING CNN...
AND YOUR SINKING HEART WILL STOP SINKING AND YOU WILL BE FREE OF THAT
DESPAIR OF NOT BEING INCLUDED.
"YOU SHOULD SHOUT WITH HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE WALKING
"I AM SO THRILLED NOT TO BE INCLUDED"
"I AM SO , SO, SO HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED."
"THATS ALL I WANT.
'EXCLUSION"
"EXCLUSION"
EXCLUSION"
PROBLEMS
SELF CREATED
LACK OF WILL POWER
SELF DESTRUCTIVE INSTINCTS
DESPAIR
DEEP, DEEP DESPAIR OF AN UNKNOWN ORIGIN
WAKING UP WITH A HEAVY HEART
GOING TO BED WITH A HEAVY HEART
CAUSE?
UNKNOWN
UNKNOWN TO ME
BUT MY HEART SINKS
IN THE MORNING AND IN THE EVENING
CAUSE
UNKNOWN
UNKNOWN TO ME
FEAR
FEAR OF SOMETHING
THAT SOMETHING NOT KNOWN
NOT KNOWN TO ME
NEED TO GET OUT IN THE MORNING
RIGHT AWAY GET OUT
TO GET SOME FRESH AIR
TO WALK
TO THINK
TO NOT LET THAT SINKING HEART OVERPOWER ME
NEED TO GET OUT, TAKE A WALK IN THE EVENING
NOT TO LET THAT SINKING FEELING GET A HOLD OVER ME
BUT CAN'T SEEM TO DO IT
CAN'T GET OUT RIGHT AWAY IN THE MORNING
EVENING?
HAVEN'T TRIED YET
TRY
TRY TO GO FOR A WALK AROUND THE PARK
IN THE MORNING AND EVENING
FORCE YOURSELF
DO NOT SIT
DO NOT SIT TO LOOK AT THE NEWS ON THE COMPUTER
THE SAME NEWS YOU WATCHED LAST NIGHT WHILE SITTING ON THE SOFA
IT'S FROM THE SOFA TO THE CHAIR
FROM ONE ROOM TO ANOTHER
GET OUT OF THE APT
NOT GOOD TO BE SITTING
AND SITTING FOR SO LONG
ESPECIALLY WITH THAT SINKING FEELING
NO TEA IN THE MORNING
IF THAT CUP OF TEA IS MAKING YOU SIT AND LOOK AT THE NEWS
WHY ARE YOU SO INTERESTED IN AMERICAN NEWS?
WHAT DO THEY DO FOR YOU?
NOTHING
COME TO THINK OF IT
NOTHING
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING
THEN WHY DO YOU SO DILIGENTLY WATCH TV?
IN THE MORNING AND EVENING
I DON'T WATCH TV IN THE MORNING
I READ ABOUT THE AMERICAN NEWS ON THE COMPUTER
AND IN THE EVENING I WATCH ON TV
WHY?
WHO KNOWS
YOU NEED TO KNOWTO AVOID SOMETHING ELSE
TO AVOID SOMETHING MORE IMPORTANT THAN THAT
EXERCISE PERHAPS
EXERCISE WILL, HELP YOU MORE THAN THE NEWS
FOR SURE
THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST GET OUT AND WALK IN THE MORNING?
WALK IN THE EVENING?
BECAUSE OF DESPAIR
DESPAIR WILL NEVER GO AWAY
YOU NEED TO GET UP, GET PUT AND LEAVE THE DESPAIR OUT IN THE STREET NEXT TO THE GARBAGE BAGS.
SIDE WALKS ARE FULL OF BLACK GARBAGE BAGS
THROW YOUR DESPAIR NEAR THE GARBAGE AND THE GARBAGE TRUCK
WILL PICK IT UP AND IT WILL BE GONE FOR EVER
NOT THAT EASY
NOT THAT EASY AT ALL
EASY SAID THAN DONE...
IT'S NOT SO HARD
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO GET UP, WEAR YOUR SNEAKERS AND TAKE A WALK
NOT SO EASY
WHY NOT?
WHAT ABOUT THAT CUP OF TEA IN THE MORNING?
WHAT ABOUT IT?
I MAKE THE TEA AND THEN I HAVE TO SIT DOWN TO DRINK IT AND YOU KNOW WHRE I SIT DOWN>?
WHERE?
NEAR THE WINDOW IN THE KITCHEN WHERE MY LAPTAP IS
AND ?
I READ ABOUT THE SAME NEWS WHICH I AM ALREADY AM AWARE OF
BY WATCHING TV ON THE PREVIOUS NIGHT
WHY DO YOU DO THAT?
BECAUSE I HAVE THAT SINKING FEELING OF MY HEART OF THAT UNKNOWN
SCARY DESPAIR
WILL THE DESPAIR GO AWAY BY READING THE NEWS IN THE MORNING?
NEVER
WILL THE DESPAIR GO AWAY BY WATCHING THE NEWS AT NIGHT?
NEVER
THEN WHY DO YOU DO IT?
THAT'S THE PROBLEM
THAT'S A MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION
I DON'T HAVE AN ANSWER
YOU WANT TO BE INCLUDED IN AMERICAN PROCESS
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU ARE HERE, RIGHT?
YOU LIVE IN AMERICA, RIGHT?
YOU ALSO WANT TO BE INVOLVED IN AMERICAN PROCESS
I DON'T WANT TO RUN FOR ELECTION
NOT THAT KIND OF PROCESS
THEN HAT?
YOU WANT TO FEEL THAT YOU ARE PART OF WHAT HAPPENS IN THE COUNTRY YOU LIVE IN...
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT...
YOU WANT TO BE PART OF THINGS CITIZEN'S ARE ALWAYS CONCERNED ABOUT
PERHAPS...
FOR SURE...
THEN WHY THE DESPAIR?
BECAUSE...
WHAT?
REMEMBER, YEARS AGO WHEN YOU CAME HERE AS A STUDENT
AND YOU ALWAYS WORE COLORFUL CLOTHES AND THEY STARTED TO CALL YPOU, "WOMAN OF COLOR?"
I REMEMBER...
YOU TOOK THAT AS A COMPLEMENT BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT IT'S BECAUSE OF YOUR COLORFUL CLOTHES THAT THEY HAVE GIVEN YOU THIS NICK NAME,
"WOMAN OF COLOR." BUT IT WAS NOT BECAUSE OF THAT...
IT WAS THE SIGNAL TO YOU THAT YOU WILL NEVER BE INCLUDED IN THE MAINSTREAM CHOICES AMERICA MAKES, OR IN ANY GROUP OR DEPARTMENT OF INTEREST...IT'S THE WHITE POWER TO CREATE THE NEWS, THE NEWS YOU WATCH,
THE NEWS FROM WHICH YOU ARE EXCLUDED, NEWS OF ALL KIND, POLITICS, ENTERTAINMENT, SOCIAL CLIMBING, EVERYTHING AND ALL THINGS...
THEY TOLD YOU THAT YOU WERE A WOMAN OF COLOR...
THAT MEANT THAT AMERICA HAS GIVEN THEMSELVES THE PERMISSION TO EXCLUDE YOU AND EXCLUDE YOU FROM EVERYTHING YOU MIGHT BE INTERESTED IN...PERIOD
AND YOU HAVE NEVER REALLY ABSORBED THAT MESSAGE WHICH WAS HINTED
AT YOU LONG TIME AGO WHEN YOU WERE A STUDENT...
SO UNDERSTAND IT NOW...
BE SO GRATEFUL NOT TO BE INCLUDED
AND TO BE INCLUDED IN ALL LIES, FAKE, DECEPTIVE INFORMATION, PREJUDICED
PROJECTS, FAVORITISM, AND ALL KINDS OF ,"ISMS"
BE SO VERY HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED....
BE THRILLED TO BE EXCLUDED
ACCEPT IT
THE MOMENT YOU ACCEPT YOU ILL STOP WATCHING TV, STOP READING ABOUT THE NEWS ON YOUR LAPTOP IN YOUR KITCHEN AND WON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT WHAT IS HAPPENING ON TV............
AND ALL YOUR SINKING FEELINGS, YOUR UNKNOWN DESPAIR WILL JUST VANISH.
BE HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED
BE PROUD TO BE EXCLUDED
BE GRATEFUL TO BE EXCLUDED
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A LUKE WARM PERSON?
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A WASHED OUT PERSON?
WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE A SHDOW OF WHITENESS?
YOU ARE A UNIQUE WOMAN
A STRONG WOMAN
A PROUD WOMAN
AN ORIGINAL WOMAN
A CREATIVE WOMAN
A COMPASSIONATE WOMAN
AN HONEST WOMAN
A TALENTED WOMAN
YOU CAN'T EVEN IMAGINE HOW TALENTED YOU ARE
DO YOU KNOW HOW TALENTED YOU ARAE?
DO YOU KNOW HOW BLESSED YOU ARE?
DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE A MAJOR SUPPORT SYSTEM BEHIND YOU?
DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TAKEN CARE OF?
YES, YOU HAVE BEEN
BY THE ALMIGHTY GOD, THE GOOD LORD KEEPS A WATCH ON YOU
YOU ARE SUPPORTED BY THE BIGGEST POWER, YOUR ALMIGHTY GOD, YOUR FAITH, YOUR SENSE OF JUSTICE, YOUR FEEL FOR HUMANITY, YOUR AFFECTION FOR THE ONES LEFT BEHIND, YOUR EMPATHY, YOUR LOVE OF BEAUTY, YOUR LOVE OF POETRY, YOUR APPRECIATION OF GRACE, FOR MERCY, FOR KINDNESS, FOR JUSTICE
TO TOP IT ALL OFF...
ISN'T IT GREAT TO BE EXCLUDED FROM THE INJUSTICE, FROM RACISM, FROM
PREJUDICE, FROM CRIMINALITY, FROM GREED, FROM HATRED?
AND ALL THE NEWS ON TV AND ON THE LAPTOP ARE ABOUT THAT...
SOME ENORMOUS POWER HAS KEPT YOU AWAY FROM THAT CRAP OF FALSEHOOD...
BE THRILLED
BE PROUD
ANNOUNCE YOUR EXCLUSION TO THE WHOLE WORLD AND GET UP
HAVE A CUP OF TEA, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE THAT CUP OF TEA IN THE MORNING WHICH YOU HAD ALL YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU WERE IN YOUR OWN BEAUTIFUL WORLD, YOUR HOME, YOUR HOME COUNTRY WHERE YOU WERE INCLUDED IN EVERY THING, EVERY LITTLE DETAIL WHICH EVERY CITIZEN SHOULD BE CONCERNED ABOUT...YOU HAD YOUR INCLUSION IN A DIFFERENT WORLD,
IN YOUR OWN WORLD...THIS IS NOT YOUR WORLD
YOU JUST HAPPEN TO BE HERE
YOU NEVER WANT TO BE INCLUDED EVEN IF THAI UNJUST WORLD WANT YOU TO BE...
YOU HAVE BEEN PROUDLY INCLUDED IN YOUR OWN WORLD, IN YOUR OWN
HOME COUNTRY...
HERE YOU MUST BE EXCLUDED...
IT'S BETTER FOR YOU TO BE EXCLUDED
YOU ARE TOO GOOD TO BE INCLUDED IN THIS MAKE BELIEVE TRUTH
LIVE WITH YOUR OWN TRUTH...
GO FOR A WALK IN THE MORNING, GO FOR A WALK IN THE EVENING
AND THINK ABOUT YOUR OWN TRUTH, THE TRUTH, THE REAL TRUTH, THE VALUES
WITH WHICH YOU WOULD LOVE TO LIVE WITH INCLUDED OR NOT...
BE PROUD, BE GRATEFUL, BE THANKFUL THAT YOU ARE NOT PART OF THAT GROUP
PART OF ANY GROUP...
YOU ARE YOUR OWN GROUP.
GOD GRANTED THAT POWER TO YOU...
YOU MUST HAPPILY ACCEPT YOUR EXCLUSION AND ONLY THEN YOUR DESPAIR WILL GO AWAY...IT WILL VANISH. I PROMISE YOU.
TRY
TRY GOING FOR A WALK INSTEAD OF READING THE NYT IN THE MORNING
GO FOR A WALK INSTED OF WATCHING CNN...
AND YOUR SINKING HEART WILL STOP SINKING AND YOU WILL BE FREE OF THAT
DESPAIR OF NOT BEING INCLUDED.
"YOU SHOULD SHOUT WITH HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE WALKING
"I AM SO THRILLED NOT TO BE INCLUDED"
"I AM SO , SO, SO HAPPY TO BE EXCLUDED."
"THATS ALL I WANT.
'EXCLUSION"
"EXCLUSION"
EXCLUSION"
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