REALITY OF A DREAM
"A NARRATIE QUITE LITERALLY DISJOINTED.
LIKE THOSE DREAMS OR NIGHTMARES THAT
MAKE SENSE MORE AS TEASING,
TROUBLING POETRY THAN WAKING LOGIC" Nigel Andrews
I love it..Bina
Saturday, December 8, 2018
Wednesday, December 5, 2018
NO MORE, NEVER MORE....
NO MORE, NEVER MORE
Do not and I say to you strictly, do not expect any favor from any one
In my experience when ever, {which is not so often} any one does a tiny favor for me I have to return it ten or twenty times more than whatever others did for me. It's just not worth it.
It is a bigger struggle and sacrifice for me to return the shitty favor.
That return actually gets painful, burdonsome and regretable.
No more favors
No more expectations of favors from ANY ONE....
Not worth my time, my money, my emotions, my satisfaction.
NO MORE, NEVER MORE...........
PROMISE?
YES, I PROMISE.
I HAVE TO....
I'TS ALREADY TOO LATE AND TOO EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATING.
PLEASE IF YOU ARE THINKING ABOUT IT, {DON'T YOU WORRY, NO ONE IS THINKING OF DOING YOU A FAVOR} ONLY YOU ARE THINKING OF DOING FAVORS TO OTHERS.
NOW YOU ARE THINKING OF BUYING GODIVE CHOCOLATES FOR PEOPLE FOR THE HOLIDAYS...
NO ONE IS THINKING OF BUYING YOU GODIVA CHOLATES...THAT'S FOR SURE.
DO YOU KNOW OF ANY ONE THINKING OF BUYING YOU GODIVA CHOCOLATES?
NOT THAT I KNOW OF...
SO WHY ARE YOU THINKING OF DOING IT?
I DON'T KNOW WHY?
YOU WANT TO PLEASE PEOPLE TO BE ACCEPTED BY THEM
I DON'T KNOW...MAYBE...
WHY?
I DON'T KNOW...
DON'T DO IT
OK
BUT I KNOW THAT YOU WILL DO IT. YOU WILL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN.
I KNOW YOU ARE GOIG TO BUY PEOPLE GODIVA CHOCOLATES...
IT'S NOT A BAD GESTURE BUT NO ONE IS DOING THAT GESTURE FOR YOU
WHY DO YOU HAVE THE NEED TO DO IT?
IT'S NOT A NEED. I JUST LIKE TO DO IT...
THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK...
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
YOU ARE A MARTYRE OR A VICTIM
YOU HAVE BECOME A PORTRAIT OF MARTYDOM AND VICTIMHOOD...
OH!
YES, OH!
HORRIBLE, I HATE BOTH OF THOSE TWO WORDS...
THEN STOP...
STOP IT...
TODAY, THIS DAY, DEC 5, 2018 STOP THIS HABIT OF SEEKING APPROVAL
IT'S NOT THAT
WHAT IS IT?
I AM GENEROUS
WHY SHOULD OTHERS NOT BE GENROUS OF YOU?
THEY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME, TAKE ME FOR GRANTED...
THEN DON'T DO IT, YOU ASS HOLE
YES, I AM AN ASS HOLE...
STILL YOU NEED TO STOP DOING FUCKING FAVORS FOR FUCKING PEOPLE
AND STOP EXPECTING TINY, LITTLE SHITTY FAVORS FROM OTHERS.
THAT'S ALL THEY DO IF THEY DO IT AT ALL...
STOP, STOP, STOP, JUST STOP IT.
DO NOT ALLOW ANY ONE TO DO YOU ANY FAVOR
BUT NOT MANY DO ANY WAY...
BUT YOU EXPECT IT. YOU EXPECT FAVORS BACK SINCE YOU MINDLESSLY KEEP DOING FUCKING FAVORS FOR THEM AND IT DISTURBS YOU WHEN THEY DON'T RESPECT THE FAVOR YOU DID FOR THEM...
STOP ALL THIS BULLSHIT FROM NOW ON....
I AM YOUR THERAPIST AND I AM SICK AND TIRED OF GIVING YOU ADVICE WHICH I HAVE BEEN GIVING FOR DECADES...AND YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED AT ALL. ACTUALY YOU ARE GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY...
I AM GOING TO STOP BEING YOUR THERAPIST IF YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ME THIS TIME...YOU HEAR...I AM GOING TO LEAVE YOU TO YORSELF, BY YOUR SELF TO KEEP
REPEATING YOUR MARTYDOM...DO YOU WANT TO AN INSTITUTION?
NO, I DON'T
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU
NO, I DEFINITLY DO NOT WANT TO GO TO AY INSTITUTION. I AM EXTREMELY SCARED OF INSTITUTIONS.
THEN STOP DOING FAVORS FOR OTHERS AT THE RISK OF THEM DOING ALMOST NOTHING OR VERY LITTLE FOR YOU...........
NO MORE FAVORS BY OTHERS AND NO MORE FAVORS FROM YOUR SIDE.
GOT IT?
YES, GOT IT.
SAY, "NO MORE, NEVER MORE"
OK
SAY IT..
"NO MORE NEVER MORE"
SAY IT AGAIN
OK
SAY IT
"NO MORE, NEVER MORE."
Do not and I say to you strictly, do not expect any favor from any one
In my experience when ever, {which is not so often} any one does a tiny favor for me I have to return it ten or twenty times more than whatever others did for me. It's just not worth it.
It is a bigger struggle and sacrifice for me to return the shitty favor.
That return actually gets painful, burdonsome and regretable.
No more favors
No more expectations of favors from ANY ONE....
Not worth my time, my money, my emotions, my satisfaction.
NO MORE, NEVER MORE...........
PROMISE?
YES, I PROMISE.
I HAVE TO....
I'TS ALREADY TOO LATE AND TOO EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATING.
PLEASE IF YOU ARE THINKING ABOUT IT, {DON'T YOU WORRY, NO ONE IS THINKING OF DOING YOU A FAVOR} ONLY YOU ARE THINKING OF DOING FAVORS TO OTHERS.
NOW YOU ARE THINKING OF BUYING GODIVE CHOCOLATES FOR PEOPLE FOR THE HOLIDAYS...
NO ONE IS THINKING OF BUYING YOU GODIVA CHOLATES...THAT'S FOR SURE.
DO YOU KNOW OF ANY ONE THINKING OF BUYING YOU GODIVA CHOCOLATES?
NOT THAT I KNOW OF...
SO WHY ARE YOU THINKING OF DOING IT?
I DON'T KNOW WHY?
YOU WANT TO PLEASE PEOPLE TO BE ACCEPTED BY THEM
I DON'T KNOW...MAYBE...
WHY?
I DON'T KNOW...
DON'T DO IT
OK
BUT I KNOW THAT YOU WILL DO IT. YOU WILL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN.
I KNOW YOU ARE GOIG TO BUY PEOPLE GODIVA CHOCOLATES...
IT'S NOT A BAD GESTURE BUT NO ONE IS DOING THAT GESTURE FOR YOU
WHY DO YOU HAVE THE NEED TO DO IT?
IT'S NOT A NEED. I JUST LIKE TO DO IT...
THAT'S WHAT YOU THINK...
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
YOU ARE A MARTYRE OR A VICTIM
YOU HAVE BECOME A PORTRAIT OF MARTYDOM AND VICTIMHOOD...
OH!
YES, OH!
HORRIBLE, I HATE BOTH OF THOSE TWO WORDS...
THEN STOP...
STOP IT...
TODAY, THIS DAY, DEC 5, 2018 STOP THIS HABIT OF SEEKING APPROVAL
IT'S NOT THAT
WHAT IS IT?
I AM GENEROUS
WHY SHOULD OTHERS NOT BE GENROUS OF YOU?
THEY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME, TAKE ME FOR GRANTED...
THEN DON'T DO IT, YOU ASS HOLE
YES, I AM AN ASS HOLE...
STILL YOU NEED TO STOP DOING FUCKING FAVORS FOR FUCKING PEOPLE
AND STOP EXPECTING TINY, LITTLE SHITTY FAVORS FROM OTHERS.
THAT'S ALL THEY DO IF THEY DO IT AT ALL...
STOP, STOP, STOP, JUST STOP IT.
DO NOT ALLOW ANY ONE TO DO YOU ANY FAVOR
BUT NOT MANY DO ANY WAY...
BUT YOU EXPECT IT. YOU EXPECT FAVORS BACK SINCE YOU MINDLESSLY KEEP DOING FUCKING FAVORS FOR THEM AND IT DISTURBS YOU WHEN THEY DON'T RESPECT THE FAVOR YOU DID FOR THEM...
STOP ALL THIS BULLSHIT FROM NOW ON....
I AM YOUR THERAPIST AND I AM SICK AND TIRED OF GIVING YOU ADVICE WHICH I HAVE BEEN GIVING FOR DECADES...AND YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED AT ALL. ACTUALY YOU ARE GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY...
I AM GOING TO STOP BEING YOUR THERAPIST IF YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ME THIS TIME...YOU HEAR...I AM GOING TO LEAVE YOU TO YORSELF, BY YOUR SELF TO KEEP
REPEATING YOUR MARTYDOM...DO YOU WANT TO AN INSTITUTION?
NO, I DON'T
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU
NO, I DEFINITLY DO NOT WANT TO GO TO AY INSTITUTION. I AM EXTREMELY SCARED OF INSTITUTIONS.
THEN STOP DOING FAVORS FOR OTHERS AT THE RISK OF THEM DOING ALMOST NOTHING OR VERY LITTLE FOR YOU...........
NO MORE FAVORS BY OTHERS AND NO MORE FAVORS FROM YOUR SIDE.
GOT IT?
YES, GOT IT.
SAY, "NO MORE, NEVER MORE"
OK
SAY IT..
"NO MORE NEVER MORE"
SAY IT AGAIN
OK
SAY IT
"NO MORE, NEVER MORE."
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