"HOW NOT TO BE...."

"HOW NOT TO BE..."
How not to be depressed
is also progress.
To do nothing but
not to be depressed is progress.

Do little things every day
which are not depressing
Forget about the big
Rewards...
You are the reward

Forget about the big picture
There is no big picture
It just looks big
They enlarged
The image themselves
So it can look overpowering

Forget about the whole thing
And this is the last time
I am telling you that
It's not a joke
I am serious, because it's the last day,
The last time,
For your therapy session...
I have a new patient now

So, it's the last minutes remaining...
Listen or don't listen
That is upto you
So let me repeat myself
Again for the last time

Forget about the whole thing
The big picture
The one which haunts you
The one you haven't owned
The source of your nightmares
The insomnia...

Forget about it
Do little things
Little things
Every day
Which are manageable
Things you can control
Things which are
Under your own control

Things which are good for you
Things which you enjoy
Even if they are waste of your time
Do them...
It's good to waste time
On things which one enjoys
What else?
What else should be important?

Suffereing?
You had enough of that
Give a break
Break to your suffering
Break to your heartache
Give a break to your
Feelings for the homeless
Why?
You must feel so much
For the un-fortunate?

They are not your homeless
They are the govt's homeless
Let them feel the pain
Let me ask you a question
Are you a homeless?
No.
Ok, good enough
Thank god for that

Did you come here to be homeless?
No.
Ok, good enough
Now stop worrying about them
Let the goverment worry about them
You are not the leader of this country
Are you?
No.
Ok, good enough

Then stop
Just stop today
Because this is the last session
By your private therapist
She got another patient
She is leaving you
She is going away
For good
Don't cry
Cries are not going to do any good

You have been crying
Since I have been treating you
Nothing changed
You just worried abot this
And that
Stop worrying about the war
War in whichever country
They are not going to stop
You will be dead and gone
And there will be wars still

You are not a general
You are not a country
You are not a bomb
You don't have enemies
Except that you have
Made yourself an enemy of your self
STOP FIGHTING THE BATTLE
  AGAINST YOURSELF

Do it now
Right now
This instance
I am going away
I am going away for good
I like you
You are a good person
But you are too much
Far too much
I wonder how the hell
Do you live with yourself?

I am going away
I am telling you for the last time
It's not your battle
The bad things happening
To people in the world
It's not your battle
As long as you are not
Doing bad things to others
Leave it alone now

You did your duty
Your values and your sense
Of morality and goodness
Is not only boring
But it's harming you
Harming you sweetheart
Really hurting you
It has gone to your immune system
Gone right down to your bones
save your self
Stop........

Do little things every day
Tiny little beautiful things
Like thinking,
Reading,
Walking,
Exploring,
Watching,
Observing,
Having coffee
Thinking again,
Reading again,
Writing

But you think you are
Not a writer
That's fine too
But still write
Just for fun
Why not?
Learn to write
If you don't know it
Learn like people learn
The piano..

Just do things for doing's sake
For fun...
For pleasure
Why any interest of your's
 Should give you pain?
Why should you continue with
What gives you pain?
Isn't enough pain around you?

Don't let it stick to your skin
You are not home
You are outside
If the pain sticks to your skin
You will have to rush back home
To take a shower
To avoid allergy and other dangerous stuff
And you just came out for a walk...

Tell the pain
Could you please go away for a while
So I can enjoy my walk?
Could you please go away for a while
So I can enjoy my coffee?
So I can enjoy reading my new book
The book I just bought...?
Please, pain, my good friend, go away
Arn't you bored with me?

You should be
I have become a big bore lately...
Remember me?
Remember, how hilariously funny
I used to be?
You still are a darling...
You still are

And this is the last time
I am telling you
You will be all alone after today
And if you want to bring
All that un-necessary sorrow
You have created for yourself
And be awake with it all night
You are welcome to it darling

Who is there to stop you?
No, not me...
I am going to France,
To Provance
I got a French patient now
I always wanted a French patient
I love the way they speak
I love their accent
It's wonderful to hear
About their pain in French
It's such a melodious language

I never feel I am hearing any sad thing
When I listen to French people
It's always a romantic song
At least it sounds like it...
That melancholy expressed in French
While we are both having madylne and coffee
 I just want to take that private plan
Right now to see my rich and melodious patient

Do't get me wrong
You were also melodious
In the beginning
Very human, very sensitive
But that has turned into tyranny
Your own tyranny against yourself
Don't surrender to your own tyranny
It's so boring and old fashioned

We are in a new world
We are in new times
We have social media
To get involved with...
Maybe it takes care of the pain
It must do something
People are so invovled in it..

Try that...
Sometime it's a good idea
To do things which have not
Much substance...
Have some fans
Not too many though
Remember HERZOG, the great
Film maker said,

"I ALWAYS SEVER MY CONTACTS
WITH FANS INSTANTLY.
IT'S UNHEALTHY."
But he is a different kind of a person
He always stick his head up.
He says, "
I STICK MY HEAD UP,
BECAUSE I KNOW WHO I AM.
I AM AT EASE WITH WHO I AM."

I think you are not at ease with yourself
And lately more and more...
You should self actualise yourself
You might find a gem there...
Or even some cosmetic jewelery
But you might find something
of your taste...
Some surprises...

But you have become too involved
In aggressive tyranny towards yourself
You have to resist that for sure
Resist that also from others at all cost...

Now I have to say final good by to you.
Trust me you are a good personn
Who has a lot of talent, yes you do...
Belive me since you never believed yourself
Don't waste it..your talent I mean
Just reserve it for yourself
You go ahaed and enjoy your talent yourself

Forget about everything else
It's for you
You must admire it yourself
You don't want to crawl in a hole
Because some other so called Important
ASSHOLE doesn't admire it...
Forget it...

Tell me one thing before I leave you
Are you expecting to win a Nobel prize
For your writing?
Are you?
You are not serious...
Ok, good enough...
Since you are not expecting Nobel prize
You should not have an ounce of worry

THAT IS THE ONLY AWARD WORTH WORRYING FOR
AND SINCE THAT IS NOT YOUR WORRY
ALL OTHER MEANINGLESS ANXIETIES
ABOUT WRITING MUST STOP...
THEY MUST PERISH...
BLOWN AWAY WITH THE WIND
OR DROWN IN THE BIG BLUE SEA...

You are a writer, right?
I think so...
All right, then write,  just write.
Write to amuse yourself
Write to express yourself
Write to feel something
Write to feel emotions
Write to feel sensations
Write to see words, your words

On the page...
Your words, your singing birds
And then let them be free
Let them fly away to far away lands
Let them fly to all those unfortunate
Lands where people are suffering
Where people are sad
Where people go through misfortunes
Let your singing birds fly to the mountains
Let your singing birds fly to the valley...

Let your singing birds fly and fall like
Petals in some one's hands
For comfort...
Let your singing birds sooth some one's soul
In foreign lands
Let your singing birds visit
The graves of your ancestors...
And whisper...
I miss you...I miss you so much...
Your singing birds will comfort clouds
In the sky and the dew drops on the petals
of roses in the gardens...
That is why you must write
The singing birds are hungry for your words
The singing birds will carry your melodious
words far and wide...far and wide...

Good by, my sweetheart of a patient
May my parting words ease the sadness in your heart
May, my parting words create more songs
For your singing birds to sing on the top of the moutains
and float on the waves of the occean...
DEEP BLUE SEA IS WAITING FOR YOUR SONGS....
I WILL BE WAITING FOR YOUR SONGS...
YES, IN PROVANCE...YOUR SONGS WILL VISIT ME...
GOOD BY NOW............

Come visit me
But heal first...
Your own words
Are there to heal you
They have no other purpose...

And through that very purpose
They will heal all the things you love
Things living and dead........