"I HAVE SUDDENLY BECOME EQUALL TO MY LIFE." DURAS plus, DIALOGUE, A SHORT PLAY BY BS

 "I HAVE SUDDENLY BECOME EQUAL TO MY LIFE."  DURAS and a short play called "Dialogue by BS

 A DIALOUGH, A SHORT PLAY BY BINA SHARIF....Copyright:binasharif 2021

===========================================

A DIALOUGH:   SHORT PLAY

                                 BY

                           BINA SHARIF

copyright:binasharif 2021

-------------------

ZULEKHA:

WHAT SPECIAL MOMENT ARE YOU WAITING FOR TO DO WHAT YOU REALLY WANT?

INJSA:

WAITING TO OPEN THE DOOR

ZULEKHA:

JUST GO AHEAD AND OPEN IT,,,OPEN THE DOOR.

INJSA:

MAYBE TOMORROW...MAYBE TOMORROW?

ZULEKHA:

"HOW CAN YOU BE CHOSEN IF YOU CAN'T MAKE A CHOICE FOR YOURSELF?"  THAT'S

 WHAT MARGUERITE DURAS SAID

INJSA:

I WOULD FORCE MYSELF TO WANT SOMETHING,  HOWEVER HARD IT MIGHT BE"

 THAT'S WHAT MARGUERITE DURAS, SAID AS WELL.

ZULEKHA:

SO ARE YOU GOING TO OPEN THE DOOR?

INJSA:

TOMORROW...MAYBE TOMORROW?

ZULEKHA:

"AS IF SOME PAIN WAS DEADENED."  THAT'S WHAT DURAS SAID.

INJSA;

I NEED TO FIND THAT DEADENED PAIN FIRST BEFORE I OPEN THE DOOR.

PAIN IS THE LOCK,  A VERY HEAVY LOCK ON THE DOOR...

"ZULEKHA:

DO YOU SEE THE DOOR?

INJSA:

YES,  I SEE THE DOOR.  IT'S MY MEMORY.   WHY IS IS IT SO DIFFICULT TO OPEN?

ZULEKHA:

SINCE YOU RECOGNIZED THAT,  IT WOULD BE MUCH EASIER...

INJSA:

I DOUBT IT.  THE PAIN IS TREMENDOUS.  AFTER THE FIRST CRACK, I WILL CLOSE THE

 DOOR SHUT AGAIN...

ZULEKHA:

YOU WILL NEVER HEAL

INJSA:

I DON'T WANT TO.  IF I HEAL,  MY MEMORIES WILL DISAPPEAR.  THEY WILL VANISH.

WHAT WILL I HAVE THEN?

ZULEKHA:

YOU WILL HAVE YOURSELF

INJSA:

WHAT GOOD WILL THAT DO?  I WON'T KNOW WHO I WAS...

ZULEKHA;

YOU NEED TO KNOW WHO YOU ARE INSTEAD OF KNOWING WHO YOU WERE...

INJSA:

I CAN NEVER KNOW WHO I AM WITHOUT KNOWING WHO I WAS?

ZULEKHA;

ONCE YOU WILL UNLOCK THE DOOR,  YOU WILL FIND OUT..

INJSA:

FIND OUT ABOUT WHO I AM?  OR WHO I WAS BEFORE?

ZULEKHA:

YOU WILL FIND OUT EVERYTHING...

MAKE AN EFFORT.

THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO DO...

KEEP MOVING TOWARDS THE DOOR...

EVERYTHING ELSE WILL HAPPEN...

INJSA:

I AM SCARED, I AM SO SCARED...

ZULEKHA;

SCARED OF WHAT?

INJSA;

ABOUT FINDING WHAT LIES BEHIND THAT DOOR.

ZULEKHA:

YOU ALREADY KNOW

INJSA:

I DO?

ZULEKHA:

YES.

INJSA:

HOW COME?

ZULEKHA;

THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE AFRAID OF.

INJSA:

AFRAID OF WHAT?

ZULEKHA:

YOU KNOW THE SOURCE OF YOUR FEAR. YOU HAVE ALREADY TOLD ME...

INJSA:

TOLD YOU ABOUT WHAT?

ZULEKHA;

ABOUT YOUR FEAR. YOUR FEAR OF YOUR MEMORIES WHICH ARE LOCKED IN THAT

 ROOM BEHIND THAT HEAVY LOCKED DOOR...

INJSA:

I CAN'T GO THERE...I CAN'T OPEN THAT DOOR,  IT'S TOO HEAVY,  I AM TOO WEAK...

ZULEKHA;

STRENGTH WILL COME TO YOU ONCE YOU START TO MOVE...

INJSA:

AND THEN?

ZULEKHA:

THEN WHAT?

INJSA: 

YES,  EXACTLY. WHAT WILL HAPPEN ONCE I STARTED TO MOVE TOWARDS THE DOOR?

ZULEKHA:

YOUR WHOLE LIFE...YOUR WHOLE LIFE WILL OPEN UP LIKE AN OPEN BOOK...

INJSA:

I DON'T WANT TO EVER OPEN THAT BOOK.

ZULEKHA:

THE BOOK IS ALREADY OPENED. OPENED BY YOUR LIFE'S LONG PAIN WAITING TO BE

 DEALT WITH...

INJSA;

IN-CASE I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT?

ZULEKHA:

THAT'S THE QUESTION AND YOU HAVE ALREADY ANSWERED IT...

INJSA:

I HAVE NO ANSWERS. THAT'S WHY I SEEKED YOUR HELP.

ZULEKHA;

I CAN'T HELP YOU.  IF IT WAS THAT EASY, I WOULD HAVE OPENED THE DOOR MYSELF

 LONG TIME AGO. EVERYTHING BEHIND THAT LOCKED DOOR BELONGS TO ME AS

 WELL BUT I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO UN-LOCK IT...I SEEM STRONG, I SEEM

 MORE POSITIVE,  MORE HEALTHY BUT THAT'S JUST A FAKE COVER...I AM EXACTLY

 LIKE YOU...SEEKING, DESIRING, WANT TO BE PAIN FREE OF MY MEMORIES WHICH ARE

 YOURS AS WELL...I AM YOUR LONG, LOST SISTER...IT WAS ACTUALLY ME WHO LOCKED

 OUR MEMORIES BEHIND THAT LOCK AND WAS WAITING FOR YOU TO COME ALONG

 AND HELP ME FIND OUT WHAT'S BEHIND MY PAIN. 

INJSA:

OUR PAIN. THAT'S WHAT IS HIDDEN.

OUR COLLECTIVE PAIN IS HIDDEN BEHIND OUR LOCKED DOORS,  DOORS WHICH WILL

 OPEN TO OUR UN-HEALED WOUNDS AND THE WOUNDS WILL BLEED AGAIN AND

 AGAIN AND AGAIN...

ZULEKHA:

PERHAPS I WAS WRONG TO TELL YOU TO OPEN THAT DOOR...

MAYBE NEITHER YOU, NOR I,  SHOULD TRY...

LET'S LEAVE THE PAIN ALONE, THE WOUNDS ALONE, THE SIMMERING SORROW

 ALONE...

LET'S LIE DOWN TO FINALLY REST. I AM SO EXHAUSTED...SO EXHUSTED THAT I CAN

 FINALLY DIE...

INJSA:

CAN I LIE DOWN NEXT TO YOU?  CAN I? 

 I FOUND YOU AFTER SUCH A LONG TIME...

A LONG, LONG TIME...

LET'S LIE DOWNTOGETHER, 

LET'S SLEEP...

 SLEEP TOGETHER IN THE SAME BED...

LIKE WE USED TO DO WHEN WE WERE CHILDREN.

IT'S BEEN A LONG JOURNEY...

A VERY LONG JOURNEY...

LET'S REST..

LET'S REST FINALLY

SLEEP...

LET'S SLEEP....

(They lie down, hug each other tightly, a song they used to listen to when they were children come on, lights slowly fade to black)

BLACKOUT

END OF PLAY

"WHAT HAPPENED?"

 "WHAT HAPPENED?"

"SO, WHAT HAPPENED?

I HAVE NO IDEA

NOT THE SLIGHTEST IDEA,  I TELL YOU...

BUT I DON'T LIKE IT

SOMETHING HAS CHANGED AND I DON'T LIKE THE CHANGE...

I AM NOW DELIBERATLEY AND HAPPILY ISOLATING MYSELF FROM EVERYONE. BS

"THINGS WHICH GIVES PLEASURE WHILE DOING THEM IS THE SMALL CHANGE." 

 DURAS

"I WANT TO BELONG TO MYSELF-TO OWN SOMETHING." DURAS

"ONCE YOU STOP LOOKING, THERE YOU ARE EXACTLY WHERE YOU WERE

 BEFORE."  DURAS

"WHO IS EVERYONE?"

A ONE ACT PAY

BY BINA SHARIF

Copyright:binasharif 2021

L:  WHO IS EVERYONE?

M:  I DON'T KNOW

L:  WAS EVERYONE THERE FOR YOU BEFORE? 

M: NO, NOT AT ALL.

L: SO,?

M:  BUT I WAS THERE FOR EVERY ONE...BUT NOW I AM NOT.

L:  PERHAPS IT'S GOOD FOR YOU-

M:  IT'S A BIT SCARY...

L:  WAS  IT A BIT SCARY BEFORE?

M:  BEFORE I WAS AVAILABLE  FOR EVERYONE AND NOW I AM NOT, THAT'S SCARY.

L:  STRANGE...

M:  YES, STRANGE. ISN'T IT?

L:  YOU SHOULD BE THRILLED THAT YOU ARE NOT AVAILABLE FOR EVERYONE NOW.

M:  I AM NOT AVAILABLE FOR ANY ONE BECAUSE THERE IS HARDLY ANY ONE AROUND.

L: I HAD NO IDEA THAT YOUR LIFE HAD BEEN SO PATHETIC...

M:  YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.  IT IS PATHETIC. THE WHOLE WORLD WAS ALWAYS

MORE IMPORTANT TO ME THAN MYSELF. THEY BEHAVED THAT THEY WERE

  MORE IMPORTANT THAN ME AND I BOUGHT IT...

L:  SO SAD...

M: SO VERY SAD, INDEED.

L:  SO, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO NOW?

M:  THAT'S A GREAT QUESTION

L:  ARE YOU GOING TO LOVE YOURSELF FROM NOW ON?

M:  I HAVE NO IDEA. NOT USED TO IT.  BUT I HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT,

L:  YOU HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT YOUR WHOLE LIFE.  NOW DO IT.

M:  BEGIN TO LOVE MYSELF?

L:  YES...

M:  HOW?

L:  THINK OF YOUR SELF AS THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON ...

M: THAT WOULD BE CHEATING. THAT WOULD BE A LIE...

L:  HOW COME?

M: YOU KNOW AND I KNOW THAT I AM NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON ON THIS

 EARTH. THERE ARE HUNDEREDS, IF NOT THOUSANDS...

L:  YOU ARE ALREADY THINKING OF OTHERS AGAIN

M:  NO, I AM NOT...

L:  YES, YOU ARE.  OTHERS ARE ALL COMING BACK...

M:  MAYBE THEY WERE ALL THERE. MAYBE THEY NEVER GONE AWAY...

L:  WHO ARE THOSE OTHERS?

M:  I DON'T KNOW.  BUT THEY ARE ALWAYS LURKING AROUND

L:  START THINKING OF YOURSELF AS IF YOU ARE THE LAST PERSON ALIVE

      AND TRY TO FIGURE OUT HOW BEST TO SURVIVE...

M: BUT I WOULD START THINKING OF ALL THE ONES WHO PERISHED.

L: THINK OF YOURSELF, YOU ARE PERISHING RIGHT IN-FRONT OF ME

M: YOU CAN STILL SEE ME...PERISHING, I MEAN?

L: YES, VERY CLEARLY...IF YOU DON'T STOP, YOU WON'T BE NO MORE.

M: MAYBE THATS WHAT I WANT...

L: YOU ARE YOUR WORST ENEMY.  WHAT HAPPENED IN YOUR PAST?

M:  DON'T GO THERE...PLEASE DON'T GO THERE...

L: DID SOME ONE HURT YOU VERY BADLY?

M:  (NO ANSWER, SILENCE, SILENCE, SILENCE)

(No one talk, they both sit there silently)

(Lights begin to fade..)

BLACK OUT

END OF PLAY

RETIRED ARTIST WHO HAS RECENTLY MOVED TO NYC TO ENJOY WHAT TE CITY OFFERS

 RETIRED ARTIST WHO HAS RECENTLY MOVED TO NYC TO ENJOY WHAT THE CITY

 OFFERS.

---------------

MUSEUMS: $32 fee...

GALLERIES:  closed, moved to Chelsea )

SO GO TO CHELSEA:  (Too far, need to take a bus and then walk )

PARKS, (Too cold right now)

THEATER, (Too expensive)

RESTAURANTS, (Fattening and expensive)

BOOK READINGS, (Which book?)

POETRY READINGS, (Where????)

BEACHES, (Too cold to swim)

BEACHES IN THE SUMMER, (Can't swim)

GO TO THE HAMPTONS, (Where am i going to sleep?)

RENT A PLACE IN THE HAMPTONS), With what money?)

GO OUT WITH FRIENDS FOR HAPPY HOUR, (Friends???)

GO FOR LONG WALKS, (Freezing outside)

MOVIES, ($ 20 )

WATCH PRIME VIDEO, ( No tv )

STATEN ISLAND FERRY, (Too cold)

GET A PART TIME JOB, (No work visa)

GO UPSTATE NY, (Where? which city?)

HUDSON, )
(Where to stay? I might sit next to Hudson river and freeze to death.)

AIRB&B, (Some one will rape me even if I could afford it)

FERRY TO STATEN ISLAND,  (In this freezing weather and on top of that what am I going to do in Staten Island? I am from Manhattan and you suggested this before. I can't stand Staten Island. I didn't leave my country just to go to Staten Island )

READ BOOKS AT HOME,  (Books? which book? i hate contemporary novels. I like philosophy and poetry, and I have read almost all the books there are to read )  I like dead wrritters, they are my best friends. I know about Victor Hugo, Balzac, Flauberet, Camus, Sartre, Valery, Malarme, Rimbaud, Baudelaire )

READ BOOKS ABOUT GREEK MYTHOLOGY, ( I. did. I read Odysse, I read Illiad, I read Greek tragidies )

YOU ARE IMPOSSIBLE, ( That's what they said about me in my country and that's why I left, came here to enjoy what NY offers)

THEN ENJOY IT, ( Enjoy what? )

NY, (How? )

GO FOR LONG WALKS IN CENTRAL PARK.  (It's snowing outside and you are sending me for a waklk? You want me to break my leg? I already have arthritis in my foot, in my knee, in my ankle, in my shoulder...)

READ A BOOK WHICH OBAMA WROTE, ( I don't like politicians)

READ A BOOK WHICH TRUMP WROTE,  HE IS NOT A POLITICIAN,  (He wrote no book, something called, "Make a deal" was written by a ghost writer. There are ghost writers now in the modern world. Every one ends up writing a book. 'Oh! my book is coming out tomorrow." They say.

They were just typists and now they are all writers. Thats why I read literature from the 17, 18, 19th Century. There were no ghost writers  then. The real writers sat next to the fire with a candle, an inkpot and a feather and they themselves wrote every word out of 1000 pages...now every story has a ghost behind it.

SIT AND DO NTHING, (That's not why I came to NY after my retirement)

SIT ON A PARK BENCH AND THINK, ( Prone to allergies, bugs bite me, i already have a swollen eye because of that.  The American eye doctor don't know what it is...I ask him, "Is it allergy? He says, "MAYBE?" I ask him, "Is it inflamation?" He says, "Maybe?"  I ask him, "Is it infected?" 'MAYBE?" He says... I can't sit in the park and take a chance for another maybe?  Nothing is diagnosed...How can anyone treat anything if they don't know the diagnosis. All guess work to make money from the insurance companies. The longer the doctors call everything , "A MAYBE?" THE PATIENT WILL KEEP COMING BACK AND MORE MONEY IN THEIR POCKETS WILL ALSO ACCUMULATE.

HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN HERE TO ENJOY WHAT NY OFFERS? (For a while )

ARE YOU ENJOYING YET?  (Enjoying? are you kidding me? Can't figure out which enjoyment NY offers will suit me and my temperament and my budget.)

HAVE YOU THOUGHT OF GOING BACK?  (Back where?")

BACK TO YOUR COUNTRY. (What?" )

SINCE YOU HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO ENJOY ANYTHING WHICH NYC OFFERS WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO BACK?  (I will enjoy eventually. that's my purpose. That was my purpose to come here.

Everyone told me that NYC offers a lot. There is no city like NY city. One can enjoy without haveing money, without having heat in the apt, without having running water, with arthritis, with allergies, with

no food, no friends, actually without having anything. The only city one can enjoy in the world without having lots of things, is NYC and you are telling me to go back...I have patience, I can wait, I have a goal and I have patience, these are two perfect abilities to achieve...I don't give up...I came from far, far away to this fun city and I am determined to have fun ...

WHEN?  (Whenever...whenever the winter will go away, the snow will go away, the arthritis will go away, whenever the eye doctor will diagnose and treate my EYE, whenever the bugs will stop biting me in the park, whenever the theater will be cheaper, whenever I will be able to eat out in Manhattan gourmet resturants, whenever the movie price will go down, whenever I will have some American friends who will teach me swimming and we will take a ferry to FAR ROCKAWAY BEACH...

OH, BY THE WAY, I FORGOT...YOU CAN ALWAYS TAKE THE FERRY TO FAR ROCKEWAY BEACH, IT'S ONLY $2-75 CENTS. ( I have sea sickness...motion sickness...when the ferry moves, I throw up)

GO TO JACKSON HEIGHTS THEN. (What for? to eat more samosa's and nan and get fat...look at me...moreover it's not Manhattan...It's not NYC. And I only took the long journey here to enjoy what NYC offers.

GO TO AVE C AND DANCE IN A NIGHT CLUB...NO COVER CHARGE FOR RETIRED PEOPLE.

(OH! I TRIED THAT. I DID. I LOVE TO DANCE AND I AM A GREAT DANCER. WHEN I WENT ON THE DANCE FLOOR, IN A FEW SECONDS EVERY OTHER DANCER LEFT...I DANCED ALONE...THAT WAS NICE. KIND OF A MOMENT OF SOLITUDE AFTER SUCH A LONG JOURNEY TO NYC...SUCH A LONG, LONG, LONG JOURNEY TO NYC TO HAVE FUN.

"WAITING FOR THE RAIN TO STOP." A ONE ACT PLAY

 "WAITING FOR THE RAIN TO STOP."

A ONE ACT PLAY

BY

BINA SHARIF

copyright:binasharif:2021

CHARACTER: SAM AND ANNA

 SAM:  Rain isn't going to stop any time soon...

ANNA:  I am not in a hurry...

 SAM:  Are you going to stay here all night?

  ANNA:  No, not all night, till the rain stop...

SAM

  Rain is not going to stop any time soon...

ANNA:   How do you know?

SAM:  The weather report, I checked the weather report...

 ANNA:    I don't trust the weather report

SAM:      But now it's raining

Yes,  now it's raining,

So the weather report was correct

ANNA: Maybe once in a while they tell the truth

SAM:    The  truth?

 ANNA:  Yes, once in a while they can be accurate

 SAM:  They were accurate this time...

ANNA: I guess so...

SAM:  So what are you going to do?

ANNA:  Stay here till thhe rain stop...

SAM:  Didn't you hear me?

ANNA: When?

SAM:  Earlier

ANNA:  Earlier when?

SAM:  When I told you that the rain is not going to stop any time soon...

ANNA: I heard you

SAM:  So, what are you going to do?

ANNA:  Do what?

SAM:  How are you going to get home?

ANNA:  Home?

SAM:  Yes, home...why don't you ever carry an umberrela?

ANNA:  I don't need an umberella...

SAM:  You don't? 

ANNA:  No, I don't...

SAM:  There is thunder storm raging outside...

ANNA:  I hear it

SAM:  Arn't you worried about it?

ANNA:  About what?

SAM:  The thunderstorm...

ANNA:  I have other worries

SAM:  What other worries?

ANNA:  Mever mind...

SAM:  Never mind...never mind...that's all you can say?

ANNA:  Yes, thats all I can say...

SAM:  Amazing

ANNA:  Lack of vocabulary...

SAM:  That's not it...

ANNA:  What is it than?

SAM:  You don't care about other people's concern for you

ANNA:  What concern?

SAM:  I am concerned about you getting home in this rain without an umberella...

ANNA:  I don't need an umberella

SAM:  How come?

ANNA:  Just don't need it...

SAM:  How the hell are you going to get home?

ANNA:  Don't need to go home.

SAM:  Where are you going?

ANNA:  Never mind...

SAM:  Where ever you are thinking of going, you would need an umberella

ANNA:  I don't need an umberella...

SAM:  Yes, you do...

ANNA:  I don't. I don't need to go anywhere...

SAM:  But you can't stay here for ever

ANNA:  Who told you?

SAM:  I mean, how can ou stay here for ever?

ANNA:  Why not?

SAM:  How can you stay some place which is not yours

ANNA:  Who told you it's not mine?

SAM:  Of course, it's not yours. 

ANNA:  How do you know?

SAM:  Every one knows

ANNA:  Everyone knows what?

SAM:  That you will have to leave this place at some point

ANNA:  And why?

SAM:  Because it's not your home

ANNA:  How do you know it's not my home?

SAM:  Because it's not...

ANNA:  How do you know?

SAM:  I know. I am not carzy like you

ANNA:  Oh! so, I am crazy now...

SAM:  You are talking like one...

ANNA:  Not me, you are talking like one...

SAM:  Me?

ANNA:  Yes, you

SAM:  How come?

ANNA:  How come? He asks me...

SAM:  Yes, you are crazy and you are calling me carzy instead.

ANNA:  How do you know that I am crazy?

SAM:  Because you are at my place and you will have to leave it at some point and you can't because

 there,

 is a thunder strom outside and you don't have an umberella...

ANNA:  I don't need an umberella, like I told you earlier...

SAM:  How are you going to get home then?

ANNA:  That's the question I have to ask you

SAM:  What question?

ANNA:  How are you going to get home in this thunder storm? Do you have an umberella?

SAM:  Of course I do. I check the weather report...and they said it's going to rain a lot this evening.

ANNA:  So, when are you going to go home?

SAM:  What do you mean?

ANNA:  When are you going to go home? 

What are you waiting for? 

You have an umberalla.  What are you

 waiting for?

SAM:  I am waiting for you to figure out how would you get home in this rain? 

ANNA;  I am concerened about you.

  I can't leave unless I figure it out that you would be safe.

SAM:  I am perfectly safe. I don't need an umberalla. I am not going home. I AM  AT HOME.

THIS IS NOT A PUBLIC PLACE. THIS IS MY HOME. YOU CAME TO

 VISIT ME. YOU SAID THAT YOU WILL BE STAYING A SHORT WHILE AND YOU ARE 

 ALREADY HERE FOR HOURS. I DON'T WANT TO BE RUDE BUT I NEED TO REST.

  I KNOW IT'S RAINIG HARD OUTSIDE BUT YOU DO N'T HAVE AN UMBERELLA,

 SO COULD YOU PLEASE LEAVE ANYWAY.  GO HOME AND BE SAFE. I HAVE AN AWFUL

 HEADACHE.

I NEED TO LIE DOWN AND I CAN'T DO THAT BECAUSE I HAVE A GUEST.

 I CAN JUST GET UP,  GO TO MY BED ROOM AND LIE DOWN BECAUSE IT'S MY

 OWN HOME, MY OWN BEDROOM, BUT I AM A VERY POLITE HOST,  I CAN'T DO THAT IF

 YOU ARE STILL SITTING HERE. 

ANNA:   BUT YOU DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT IT'S YOU

 WHO CAME TO VISIT AND IT'S YOU WHO HAS TO

 LEAVE AT SOME POINT,   YOU DON'T SEEM WELL. ARE YOU ALRIGHT?

(Silence for a while)

SAM:  I NEED TO REMIND YOU AGAIN THAT IT WAS YOU WHO CAME TO VISIT ME.  AND

 THE

 REASON WAS TO HAVE SOME COFFEE,  DO SOME SMALL TALK AND THEN LEAVE...

(Silence for a while)

 .AND NOW,  YOU ARE RELUCTENT TO GO HOME... (Silent)

( he yells)   COULD YOU PLEASE LEAVE,  LEAVE EVEN WITHOUT YOUR

 UMBERELLA AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. (silent)

 ...CAN'T BELIEVE I AM GOING 

THROUGH THIS IN MY OWN HOME.   (Silent) (Then shouts)

I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ANY MORE,  IF YOU GET SOAKING WET AND EVEN

 DROWN.  YOU HAVE

 GIVEN ME A TERRIBLE HEADACHE...I NEED TO REST.  I NEED TO SLEEP.   CAN YOU

 IMAGINE THAT,  I AM

 IN MY OWN HOUSE AND SUFFERING THIS DISASTEROUS VISIT BY A 

 MENTAL PATIENT?

  I THOUGHT SHE WAS A FRIEND BUT SHE IS AN OCCUPIER...JESUS CHRIST...

WE ARE NOT IN A PUBLIC PLACE, WE ARE NOT IN A CAFE. YOU ARE AT MY HOME AND

 YOU HAVE TO GET GOING,  BECAUSE I AM GETTING SICK...I NEED TO LIE DOWN...

 ANNA:  OH! I SEE, I THOUGHT I WAS IN A CAFE. I REALLY THOUGHT THAT YOU INVITED

 ME TO A CAFE, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT A HOME PERSON, YOU ARE A CAFE PERSON, 

AND I LOVED THE COFFEE. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THAT YOU CAN MAKE SUCH A GOOD

 COFFEE. I MEAN, IF YOU CAN MAKE SUCH A FANTASTIC COFFEE, HOT AND FROTHY

 AND DELICIOUS, WHY WOULD YOU GO TO A LOUSY CAFE?  WHY SPEND 7-10 DOLLARS

 ON A LUKE WARM, SHITTY COFFEE?  SINCE YOU TOLD ME WE ARE AT YOUR OWN

 HOME, I JUST REALIZED HOW MUCH IT LOOKS LIKE THE CAFE YOU INVITED ME TO...

I LIKE THIS CAFE LIKE ATMOSPHERE...VERY RELAXING...MUCH MORE RELAXING THAN

THE  REAL CAFE...

TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,  I AM...

LD?AFRAID TO GO OUT IN THIS

 DANGEROUS THUNDERSTORM... I NEED TO LIE DOWN MYSELF.

 SO EXHAUSTED FROM THE WEATHER AND THESE KINDS OF SILLY CONFUSIONS.

WHY IS EVERY BODY SO CONFUSED?  WHAT'S GOING ON WITH THE WORLD? OH! MAN I

 AM SO, SO EXHAUSTED BY PEOPLE WHO CAN NOT THINK CLEARLY.

(Silent for a while)

  WHERE IS YOUR BEDROOM? 

NEED TO LIE DOWN....DOES THAT DOOR, (She points towards stage left) LEAD TOWARDS

 YOUR BED ROOM?

  I AM GOING TO WAIT TILL THE RAIN STOPS.  I AM SURE YOUR

 BED ROOM IS EXTREMELY COMFY.  I WILL LEAVE WHEN THE RAIN STOP.  I PROMISE.

 TOMORROW, 

 DAY AFTER TOMORROW,  NEXT WEEK,  NEXT MONTH,  NEXT YEAR,  AS LONG AS 

YOUR BED IS COMFORTABEL AND KNOWING YOUR STYLE  TO BE PERFECT I CAN SLEEP

 IN THAT BED OF YOURS TILL ETERNITY...THESE KINDS OF THUNDERSTORMS GO ON

 FOR A WHILE.

  SO GOOD NIGHT.

(Ann gets up and starts to walk towards the room next to the living room. Sam, is in a state of shock)

(lights slowly fade, sound of door opening and closing...thunderstrom gets louder...lights fade to..

                                                                          BLACK OUT

                                                                        END OF PLAY

"DAYS AND NIGHTS OF KARIMA ULLAH" : (A PERFORMANCE NOVEL)

 "DAYS AND NIGHTS OF KARIMA ULLAH" : (A PERFORMANCE NOVEL)

MANHATTAN DAYS OF KARIMA ULLAH: (A PERFORMANCE NOVEL)

 MANHATTAN DAYS OF KARIMA ULLAH: (A PERFORMANCE NOVEL)

"IT'S A TIREDNESS WHICH COMES FROM VERY FAR." DURAS

 "IT'S A TIREDNESS WHICH COMES FROM VERY FAR."  DURAS.

"I WAS THE ONE WHO LOVED."

 "I WAS THE ONE WHO LOVED."

"MY GREAT COLLECTION OF BOOKS NEED A DIALOGUE."

"MY GREAT COLLECTION OF BOOKS NEED A DIALOGUE." 

"YOU HAVE SO MANY ONE WOMAN SHOWS TO DO."

 "YOU HAVE SO MANY ONE WOMAN SHOWS TO DO."

"WHY WOULD I COME TO YOU? GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON..."

 "WHY WOULD I COME TO YOU?  GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON."

"THINGS WHICH MOVE BACK AND FORTH IN TIME."

 "THINGS WHICH MOVE BACK AND FORTH IN TIME."

"THINGS WITHIN THINGS"

 "THINGS WITHIN THINGS."

I, KARIMA ULLLAH! " DISTANT PARTS OF MYSELF"

 I, KARIMAULLAHA! "DISTANT PARTS OF MYSELF."

LITERARY SALON AT 4W

 LITERARY SALON AT 4W

MONDAY, AUGUST 2ND AT 11 AM

BEGIN A PROJECT FOR THE SALON.

MAYBE THE HAND WRITTEN NOTE BOOKS TO BE PUT ON THE BLOG.

BE DILIGENT NOW ABOUT THIS.-

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"NO MATTER WHAT! IT GOES IN"

 "NO MATTER WHAT IT GOES IN"

"With memories sleeping in that thick head of hair."    Baudelaire

'Languorous Asia--a whole far away world--absent".   Baudelaire

"le Gout du-n`eant".  (Taste for nothingness).               Baudelaire

"Avalanche will you sweep me along in your fall?"      Baudelaire

"Fate has aleady banished me.                                        Baudelaire

"Fathomless gloom"                                                        Baudelaire

"Sunlight on the sea".                                                      CB

"Morbid or petulant, you are all pleasure".                     CB

"Conquered human race"                                                 CB

"But why is she weeping? She, the perfect beauty.          CB

"La Chevelure"  (Hair)                                                      CB

'Blasphemy of art"                                                             CB

"With memories sleeping in that thick head of hair".        CB

"Endless lulling of sweet scented leisure".                         CB

"Oil of coconut, musk and tar"                                               CB

"Scatter sappires, rubies, pearls".                                         CB

"So sad amongst my poems"                                                 BS

"Just dream--dream about where you want to be-"               BS

'PROJECTS" LIKE ALL SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE SAY

 PROJECTS

IST ONE:

The posts from the facebook,  put them together and make a one woman show.

 The potential title for now: " DIARY OF A THOUGHT" (SELECTION FROM FACEBOOK POSTS)

SECOND ONE;

ANOTHER JOURNEY:  ALONG THE TRACKS

  Explore the places on subway trains, write about whatever intersts you.

                                          Come home, type it, put it together and make another one woman show.

TAKE BOTH SHOWS ON THE ROAD.

And let everyone else go to the devil.

NO WORRIES OR EVEN THINKING OF THE RIFF-RAFF OF THE WORLD

AND WHO IS WHO AND WHO IS GETTING AHEAD....

THATS IT...NEW PROJECTS.

3RD PROJECT:

To completely eliminate all people, and I say, all people from your mind, from your psyche. They can go to the moon, let devil worry about it but not you.  "GETTING AHEAD, (your favorite sentence) and you shouldn't give a shit of a thought. Why do you waste everything you have on that kind of nonsense?  Are you mad?

No more, never more. Like Poe would say. 

Any time,  these kind of wasteful thoughts come to you, SHUN THEM OFF WITH VIGOR, THEY

 ARE DESTROYING ALL YOUR TALENT.  DO YOU WANT THAT?

YOU HAVE TO TRY VERY HARD TO ACHIEVE THIS RESULT.  FORGET ABOUT THE OTHERS.

DO THEY THINK ABOUT YOU SO SERIOUSLY? OR DO THEY THINK ABOUT YOU AT ALL?

SO SAD, THE SITUATION HAS BECOME. YES, YOUR SITUATION.

IF YOU DON'T PUT A STOP TO IT NOW,  IT WILL BE TOO LATE. IT ALREADY IS.  STOP IT.....

THINGS NOT TO BE DONE: "BEGIN AGAIN" "YOU SAY BISMILLAH AND END THE ROT." FOR YOU KARIMA ULLAH

THINGS NOT TO BE DONE:  "BEGIN AGAIN."

Not too much expression of any kind of thoughts with people

Express those thoughts in writing

No interest in politics

No mention of you know what?

No irritation at, you know what?

Do things alone

Don't need any one

Enjoy your company

Enjoy your passion by yourself

Do the things you really feel like doing

things such as, reading, writing, drawing, walking, cafe's, laughter,

solitude, movies, good food, water, rivers, occean, flowers, trees, leaves, birds.

Be a mystery, not an open book

Love yourself

Respect yourself

Admire yourself

Admire your work

Admire yourself for doing so much work single handedly

Do paintings, watercolors, charcoal drawings,  go to the beach more...sit near the rivers, think,

Imagine, love your imagination, love your spirit, give.  Give to the one who desreves it.

Don't throw your pearls in-front of the swine.  BE ALONE, IT'S SO IMPORTANT FOR YOU.

Get rid of lots of riff-raff. Do one woman shows...Only one woman plays...save yourself the heartache..

Be independent, be more independent, create independently...FORGET ABOUT RECOGNITION.

You are waiting to be recognised by whom?  Think about it...F**k them. They will have their day.

Some one is watching...

Be tender to yourself

Be kind to yourself

Be generous to your self

GIVE YOURSELF WHAT YOU DESERVE

DON'T GIVE YOURSELF WHAT YOU DON'T DESREVE...

BE NOT DEPRESSED

DO NT REGRET

PAST IS PAST

CREATE SOMETHING ABOUT IT

EXPRESS YOUR SELF IN YOUR GRIEF, IN YOUR SORROW, IN YOUR SADNESS,

DO NOT DISCUSS IT WITH ANY ONE...

THEY ARE JUST THERE TO FILL THE ROOM...

FILL YOUR HEART, YOUR MIND, YOUR SPIRIT WITH YOUR OWN CREATION, WITH YOUR

 OWN BEAUTY , WITH YOUR OWN STRENGTH, WITH YOUR OWN ABILITY, WITH YOUR

 OWN WIT.

 

 WITH YOUR HUMOR, WITH YOUR KNOWLEDGE, WITH YOUR EDUCATION, WITH YOUR

 GRACE, WITH YOUR CLASS, WITH YOUR STYLE, WITH YOUR CONCENTRATION, WITH

  YOUR SARCASAM, WITH YOUR METAPHORES, WITH YOUR

 SINGING BIRDS...

SEE HOW MANY COMPANIONS YOU DO HAVE?

AND YOU THOUGHT YOU HAD NO ONE TO DEPEND ON...

NO ONE,  AND I TELL YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL NO ONE,  IS GOING TO DO ANYTHING

FOR YOU,  NO ONE IS GOING TO ACKNOWLEDGE YOU,  AND YOUR CREATIVE SPIRIT...

WHY SHOULD THEY? THEY ARE MISERABLE BY THEMSELVES...THEY ARE NOTHING TO

 YOU, THE LEAST VALUABLE THINGS IN YOUR SURROUNDINGS,  THEY BELONG IN THE

 GARBAGE, THROW THOSE FEELINGS OF ABANDONEMNET. OH! YOU WERE ABANDONED

 BY THEM?...BY THEM? MY, MY, MY

 GOODNESS...HOW SAD IS YOUR STATE OF AFFAIRS.  THE THINGS WHICH BELONG TO

 THE...

 GARBAGE, YOU WANT RECOGNITION FROM THEM?  FROM GARBAGE?  YES, GARBAGE...

VISULIZE THAT AND FEEL UPSET, THROW UP, YOU HAVE BEEN WASTING YOUR LIFE TO

BE RECOGNIZED BY GARBAGE?  I FEEL SAD FOR YOU...I FEEL SORRY FOR YOU...YOU

 HAVE DIAMONDS IN YOUR HAND AND YOU ARE SEEKING REWARDS FROM THE

 GARBAGE...YOU HAVE PEARLS IN YOUR HANDS, RUBIES IN YOUR HAND AND YOUR

 DESIRE IS OF GARBAGE...ARE YOU OK?

HAVE YOU GONE MENTAL? IS SOMEHING SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH YOUR HEAD?  HAVE

 YOU LOST YOUR MIND COMPLETELY?

THERE IS STILL TIME...IMAGINE THAT...STILL GOD HAS GIVEN YOU TIME ALONG WITH

 ALL THE OTHER GIFTS, HEALTH, THE MOST PRECIOUS...DON'T LOSE THAT, NO MATTER

 WHAT YOU DO OR DON'T DO...TAKE YOUR HEALTH AS THE MOST SERIOUS PROJECT...

THROW THE GARBAGE OUT TODAY FOR EVER...

IT'S BEEN THERE FOR DECADES...

YES, DECADES...

IT'S NOW SMELLING ROTTEN

SO ROTTEN THAT IT HAS BECOME TOXIC...

YOU SIMPLY CAN'T GO NEAR IT...

WEAR A SET OF HEAVEY CONSTRUCTION GLOVES AND THROW THE SHIT OUT...

HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO KEEP THE STINKING, ROTTEN, DANGEROUS GARBAGE

 AROUND YOU?"

IN YOUR BRAIN?  HOW LONG?

ANOTHER CENTURY?

YOU DON'T HAVE TIME GIRL, YOU DON'T HAVE TIME.

YOU HAVE WASTED DECADES...DECADES...ALREADY.

TODAY IT ENDS.

YES, SAY BISMILLAH AND END THE ROT...

THROW IT OUT...NEVER TO BE THOUGHT ABOUT AGAIN.

IT'S RUBBISH DARLING, RUBBISH...'YOU JUST DIDN'T KNOW IT..

I AM NOT BLAMING YOU...

YOU WERE IGNORANT OF WHAT IT CONTAINED.

BUT NOW YOU HAVE THE CLARIFICATIIN...

NOW YOU MUST DEAL WITH IT..

END IT...

EVERYTHING ENDS...

END OF PLAY

END OF LIFE

END OF GARBAGE...

OUT OF YOUR HEAD

INTO THE BIN

THROWN OUT...

THROWN OUT...

THROWN OUT....

FINALLY...

GO FOR A NICE, HOT CUP OF LATTE...

CELEBRATE...

CELEBRATE YOUR LIFE

CELEBRATE YOUR TALENT

CELEBRATE YOUR IMAGINATION

CELEBRATE YOUR FEELINGS

CELEBRATE YOUR THOUGHTS

CELEBRATE ALL KINDS OF THOUGHTS, YOUR THOUGHTS.

THEY ARE ALL YOURS

KEEP THEM FOR YOUR SELF...

NO, NO SHARING OF YOUR THOUGHTS WITH ANY ONE...

BECOME A DEAF AND DUMB PERSON FROM NOW ON...

FROM THIS INSTANT ON...

YOU, AND YOUR CREATIVITY OF ALL KINDS MUST ACCOMPANY YOU AT ALL TIMES

AND IF YOU HAVE TO HAVE SOME ONE WITH YOU, JUST SMILE AND SAY VERY LITTLE, 

TALK OF THE WEATHER AND HOW GREAT DEMOCRACY IS...NOTHING ELSE...

IT'S BEST THAT YOU DON'T TALK AT ALL...BEHAVE STUPID, IGNORANT, SMILE, AGREE

WITH ALL THE NONSENSE...

BUT THE BEST FOR YOU IS JUST TO BE ALONE WITH YOUR OWN SENSITIVITY, YOUR

 OWN ABILITY, YOUR OWN IMAGINATION...

IMAGINE AND THINGS WILL COME TO YOU...LIKE IDEAS..LIKE HOW ALL YOUR PLAYS

 CAME TO YOU. 

CAME TO YOU FROM NO WHERE?

RIGHT?

YES, THEY CAME FROM NOWHERE...

THAT NOWHERE IS CALLED, "IMAGINATION."

DO NOT ABANDONE THAT PRECIOUS TERRITORY CALLED, "NOWHERE"

THAT'S THE DIAMOND YOU NEVER KNEW YOU OWNED,.

POSSESS THAT, OWN THAT DIAMOND...NAMED, "NOWHERE"

GET HOLD OF THAT SPACE, THAT PLACE WITHIN YOUR GRASP.

IT'S YOURS.

IT'S YOUR IMAGINATIN...

ALL YOUR PLAYS CAME FROM THAT IMAGINATION

NO OTHER PERSON GAVE IT TO YOU

NO, NO OTHER PERSON...

THAT'S THE ABSOLUTE TRUTH...

LOCK YOUR IMAGINATION WITHIN A SAFE FOR YOUR SELF, ONLY FOR YOURSELF

YOU KEEP THE KEY HIDDEN IN ANOTHER SAFE PLACE

NO DISCUSSIONS OF ANY KIND WITH ANY BODY...

NO DISCUSSIONS, OF ANY KIND, I SAID.

DO NOT WASTE YOUR ENERGY, YOUR PASSIONS, YOUR GIFT WITH ANY ONE FROM

 NOW ON...

THE GARBAGE IS THROWN OUT

YOUR MIND IS CLEAN

BEGIN....

BEGIN AGAIN...

"SAY BUSMILLAH AND GET RID OF THE ROT."

BEGIN AGAIN...