A DAY TO GIVE

A DAY TO GIVE

I ONLY HAVE ONE DAY TO GIVE
AND THAT DAY IS TOMORROW
TOMORROW I WILL GIVE
I PROMISE...

I WILL GIVE MY LOVE
MY AFFECTION
MY COMFORT
MY MONEY

TOMORROW,
I WILL GIVE
I PROMISE
LIKE I USED TO

LIKE I USED TO GIVE
EVERY DAY
EVERY DAY
WITHOUT FAIL

I GAVE
MY LOVE
MY AFFECTION
MY MONEY

I GAVE
AND THEN GAVE
AND THEN GAVE SOME MORE
AND THEN SOME MORE AND SOME MORE

I GAVE MY TIME...
THE MOST PRECIOUS
THING OF ALL
I GAVE MY PRECIOUS TIME

CAN YOU IMGINE/
I GAVE MY TIME
TO OTHERS
OTHERS WHO WERE NOT WORTHY

NOT WORTHY OF SUCH A GIFT
A RARE GEM
A BLACK OPAL FROM ETHOPIA
A BUGUNDY RED RUBY

GAVE IT AWAY...
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?
WHAT WERE YOU THINKING KARIMA?
WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?

NOT THINKING
NOT THINKING AT ALL
JUST GIVING
JUST GIVING IT AWAY

A RARE THING LIKE TIME
WHICH NEVER COME BACK
NEVER
GONE FOR EVER...

CAN'T CATCH IT
IT'S A BIRD
WHO HAS FLOWN AWAY
TO DIFFERENT

LANDS
MORE SYMPATHETIC TO IT'S SENSITIVITY
MORE AWARE OF IT'S VALUE
MORE KEEN TO EMBRACE IT

THE GIFT...
THE GIFT WHICH EVEN KINGS CAN'T
AFFORD TO JUST GIVE AWAY
AND YOU DID

YOU, KARIMA
YOU DID
YOU GAVE AWAY YOUR TIME
YOUR OST VALUABLE GEM

YOU DIDN'T GIVE IT AWAY
YOU THREW IT AWAY
HOW COULD YOU?
KARIMA...

HOW COULD YOU?
NOW YOU HAVE NO TIME
NO TIME TO PREPARE ...
FOR ANYTHING

IT JUST GONE
LOST
DROWNED
DISOWNED

NO, BY YOU
NOT DISOWNED BY THE OTHERS
BY YOU
KARIMA

BY YOU...
NOW YOU ARE SAD
ARE YOU?
YOU SHOULD BE

WHAT DO YOU HAVE NOW?
WTHE SKY
WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?
WHAT WOULD YOU DO NOW?
DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO DO ANYTHING NOW?

NO.  NOT ENOUGH TIME
NO TIME AT ALL
I THREW IT AWAY
IN THE DUST

I THREW IT AWAY
FAR ABOVE THE EARTH
AND IT FLEW
FLEW AWAY

LIKE THE BIRD
THE BIRD WITH WINGS
WINGS MADE IT FLY
FLY AWAY

NOW WHAT WOULD YOU GIVE?
WHEN THE TIME COMES TO GIVE?
WHAT WOULD YOU GIVE TODAY?
WHAT WOULD YOU GIVE AWAY TODAY KARIMA?

I ONLY HAVE ONE DAY TO GIVE
AND THAT DAY IS TOMORROW
TOMORROW I WILL GIVE
I PROMISE...

WHAT WILL YOU GIVE KARIMA?
WHAT WILL YOU GIVE TOMORROW?
WOULD YOU GIVE YOUR TIME?
WOULD YOU?

I ONLY HAVE ONE DAY TO GIVE
AND THAT DAY IS TOMORROW
TOMORROW I WILL GIVE
I PROMISE...

WHAT WILL YOU GIVE TOMORROW?
KARIMA, WHAT WILL YOU GIVE TOMORROW?
I DON'T KNOW...
I HAVE NOTHING LEFT...

I GAVE EVERYTHING AWAY...
GIVE  AWAY A LIT BIT OF YOUR TIME TOMORROW
OH! I CAN'T PROMISE THAT
IMPOSSIBLE...

TIME I DON'T HAVE
NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT
THATS ALL GONE
GONE FOR EVER...

I GAVE IT AWAY YESTERDAY
WITHOUT THINKING...
I GAVE IT ALL AWAY...
ITS GONE...

NOW I HAVE ONLY ONE DAY TO GIVE
AND TODAY IS NOT THE DAY
TOMORROW I WILL GIVE
I PROMISE...

YOU ALWAYS KEPT YOUR PROMISE KARIMA
YOU ALWAYS DID...
BUT YOU HAVE NOTHING LEFT FOR TOMORROW
YOU WILL BREAK YOUR PROMISE

 TOMORROW...
TOMORROW YOU WILL BREAK YOUR PROMISE
FOR THE FIRST TIME
IN YOUR LIFE...

TOMORROW, KARIMA
TOMORROW, YOU WILL HAVE NOTHING TO GIVE
I DO.  I HAVE SOMETING TO GIVE TOMORROW
I PROMISE...

I WILL GIVE MY SADNESS AWAY
I WILL PART WITH MY SANESS TOMORROW
I  WILL THROW IT AWAY IN THE DUST...
I PROMISE.......................

DUST

DUST

LOST IN HER SADNESS
KARIMA STOPPED NOTICING PEOPLE AROUND HER
VERY SON SHE REMOVED HERSELF FROM THE VICINITY OF PEOPLE
NOW SHE WAS ALL ALONE BY HERSELF  ,OST OF THE TIME
HER SADNESS STAYED.

AROUND PEOPLE SHE FELT HER SMALLNESS
ACTUALLY SHE MADE HERSELF SMALL AROUND PEOPLE
BUT HER SENSE OF SMALLNESS STAYED
SOMETIME SHE WONDERED ABOUT HER SADNESS

MOST OF THE TIME SHE IGNORED IT
AND SOMETIMES, SHE ACKNOWLEDGED IT
BUT IT NEVER REALLY DISTURBED HER
IT BECAME HER CONSTANT COMPANION

THE SADNESS, I MEAN
WHEN SHE LOOKED IN THE MIRROR IN THE MORNING
THE MIRROR REMINDED HER OF HER SADNESS
THEN SHE STOPPED LOOKING AT THE MIRROR

SHE BROKE ALL MIRRORS IN HER HOUSE
WHEN SHE WAS A LITTLE GIRL SHE ADORED MIRRORS
SHE STOOD IN-FRONT OF THEM ALL DAY
LOOKING AT HER PETITE FIGURE

LOOKING AT HER DARK BROWN EYES
LOOKING AT HER FULL RIPE LIPS
ADMIRING HER JET BLACK VELVETY HAIR
ADMIRING HER OLIVE COMPLEXION

MORE OLIVE THAN REAL OLIVES
SHE LOVED OLIVES
SHE NIBBLED ON THEM
WHEN HER ADULT FAMILY MEMBERS DRANK MARTINI'S

SHE WOULD ASK FOR THE OLIVES AND HER ADULT RELATIVES
WOULD GIVE IT TO HER
WHEN SHE GREW UP SHE NEVER DRANK MARTINI
IT REMINDED HER OF HER DEAD RELATIVES

MAYBE HER SADNESS WAS BECAUSE OF THAT?
THE MISSING  MARTINI'S AND THE MISSING OLIVES
SHE COULD GO TO THE MARKET AND BUY SOME
BUT SHE LOST THE TASTE OF OLIVES

AND HER COMPLEXION WAS NOT OF OLIVE SHADE ANYMORE
IT WAS PALE AS THE PALE, VERY PALE LEMONADE
SHE USED TO DRINK LEMONADES WHEN SHE WAS YOUNG
BUT NOW IN THE WINTRY CITY

WHERE SHE LIVED, THE COLD LEMONADE WAS
TOO COLD FOR HER TO DRINK...
IT HURT HER TEETH
AND THE TASTE HAD ALREADY DISAPPEARED

SHE LIKED HOT DRINKS
BECAUSE SHE WAS ALWAYS COLD
THE COLD WEATHER MADE HER MORE SAD
AND IT WAS ALWAYS COLD

WHY DID SHE LIVE IN THE COLD COUNTRY?
BECAUSE SHE HAD NO OTHER PLACE TO GO
SHE HAD NO  HOME ANYWHERE ANY MORE
EXCEPT A SMALL ROOM WITHOUT MIRRORS

WITHOUT OLIVES
WITHOUT LEMONADE
WITHOUT THE WARMTH OF A COMPANION
BUT DID SHE WANT A COMPANION?

NO, NOT ANY MORE
FOR A WHILE SHE DID
SHE WANTED A RELATIVE OR A FRIEND NEARBY
BUT NOT ANY MORE...

SHE REMINDED HERSELF CONSTANTLY
THAT SHE WAS NOT ALONE
NEVER ALONE
SHE HAD SOME ONE

SOMEONE VERY DEAR TO HER
ALMOST AS DEAR AS HER DEAD RELATIVES
AS DEAR AS THE WARMTH OF THGE HOT SUN
AS EAR AS THE HOT COCO...

SHE WOULD TALK TO HER COMPANION
CONSTANTLY
DAY AND NIGHT
ALL NIGHT

AND HER COMPANION WOULD INSTANTLY SHOW UP
ACTUALLY WAS ALWAYS THERE BEHIND HER
HER SHADOW EVEN IN THE DARK
HER SADNESS WAS ALWAYS AROUND

TO REMIND HER
THAT THE SADNESS, SHE WAS SO LOST IN
WOULD NEVER ABANDON HER
NEVER....

NEVER TO DAY
NEVER TOMORROW
NEVER DURING THE DAY
NEVER DURING THE NIGHT

HOW FORTUNATE WAS KARIMA
SHE HAD THE BEST FRIEND
ANY ONE CAN EVER...HAVE
IN A CITY WHICH WAS SO LONELY

YES, THE CITY SHE LIVED IN
WAS VERY LONELY
ALL IT'S INHABITANTS
SEEM VERY LONELY

LONELY AND SAD
WAS TO BE WITH HUMAN WARMTH
THAT POSSIBLE?
YES,
BECAUSE EVERY ONE'S RELATIVES WERE DEAD

AND GONE FOR EVER
AND THHE CITY WAS COLD
COLD AS ICE
SLIPPERY...

IT WAS MORE OF A REASON
FOR PEOPLE OF THIS CITY
TO BE WITH OTHER SADNESSS
BUT THEY WERE AFRAID

AFRAID OF OTHER HUMANS
THEY DIDN'T WANT TO GET HURT
THEY HAVE BEEN HURT BEFORE
THEY DIN'T How are you?VE THE STRENGTH

TO BE HURT AGAIN
SO THEY REMAIN LOST
IN THEIR SADNESS
LIKE KARIMA...

THEY WOULD RATHER BE
LOST IN SADNESS
IT WAS MORE COMFORTING
THAN PEOPLE

THEY DIDN'T KNOW KARIMA
KARIMA DIDN'T KNOW THEM EITHER
BUT THEY UNDERSTOOD
EACH OTHER'S SADNESS

AND DECIDED TO NEVER GET RID OF IT
THAT WAS ACTUALLY A GOOD CHOICE
WHY GET RID OF ONLY THING YOU HAVE?
WHY NOT ENJOY IT?

WHY NOT EMBRACE IT?
WHY NOIT CHERISH IT?
THERE IS NOTHING WRONG
FOR THEM TO BE LOST IN THEIR SADNESS....

BY
BINA SHARIF
copyright:biasharif Dec, 2019

















SHE COULD

ANY TIME OF THE DAY

ANY TIME OF THE DAY

SHE WAS WHISPERING

SO AFRAID OF SOMETHING

SHE COULDN'T TALK

IN A LOW WHISPER SHE SAID,

"I AM BUSY."

AND SHE IS A FOREIGNER

FOREIGNERS DO NOT GET OFF THE PHONE SO FAST

BUT SHE IS NOW VERY AMERICANIZED.

SHE HAS AN AMERICAN LOVER

I LIKE AMERICANS

THEY ARE VERY DIRECT

UP-TO THE POINT

NO BULLSHIT

"CAN'T TALK.  VERY BUSY."  THEY SAY

THAT TAKES CARE OF IT

THAT TAKES CARE OF EVERYTHING

I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF THINGS TOO.

FAR TOO MANY THINGS NEED TO BE TAKEN CARE OF

BUT I CAN NEVER SAY SO ABRUPTLY,

"CAN'T TALK, SO BUSY."

BECAUSE I AM A FOREIGNER

I JUST THINK

I DON'T DO

I JUST THINK

I THINK TOO MUCH

TOO MUCH THINKING IS NOT GOOD

I THINK ALL THE TIME

BUT THINKING IS NOT PART OF BEING BUSY

DOING SOMETHING IS PART OF BEING BUSY

DOING SOMETHING IS,"BUSY"

"DO SOMETHING"

"WHAT"

"SOMETHING"

"I DON'T KNOW."

"WHAT IS THAT?"

"WHAT'S WHAT?"

"I DON'T KNOW."

"YES, I DON'T KNOW.  I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING."

"I WILL TELL YOU WHAT YOU SHOULD DO."

"TELL ME."

"DON'T THINK, DON'T TALK"

"DO WHAT THEN?"

"TEXT."

"TEXT?"

"YES, TEXT, BE MODERN.  YOU ARE IN NY.  YOU BEHAVE LIKE YOU ARE FROM

SOME REMOTE VILLAGE OF BANGLADESH"

"I AM NOT FROM BANGLADESH.  I AM FROM EAST VILLAGE."

"THEN BEHAVE LIKE ONE.  BEHAVE LIKE AN EAST VILLAGER.  YOU TALK LIKE YOU

ARE FROM TIMBUKTU. EVEN PEOPLE FROM TIMBUKTU ARE TEXTING. IT'S

PROGRESS. TECHNOLOGY IS PROGRESS."

"BUT IT'S TAKING HUMANITY BACKWARDS.  IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY

ONE'S VOICE WHY TEXT THEM AT ALL?  IF YOU DON'T WANT TO ANSWER THE PHONE

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT TO TEXT THEM? PEOPLE SO VERY PROUDLY SAY SAY, "OH1

NO- I NEVER ANSWER ANY ONE'S PHONE CALL.  IT'S AMAZING."

"ITS PROGRESS."

"IT'S MORAL DETERIORATION, SOCIAL DETERIORATION.  IT'S INDIFFERENCE

TOWARDS ALL THE SENSES.  INDIFFERENCE TO THE MELODIOUS SOUND OF HMAN

VOICE.  ALL SENSES ARE WASTED. TOUCH, SMELL, SOUND, TASTE, LANGUAGE,

CONVERSATION...ALL WASTED.  WE ARE IN A WASTELAND.

HUMAN BEINGS ARE NOT TALKING TO EACH OTHER.  THEY ARE NOT LISTENING

TO EACH OTHER.  THEY WOULD LOVE TO KILL EACH OTHER BUT ANSWERING THE

PHONE IS OUT.  THEY ARE ALL WIRED UP.  THEY DON'T HEAR ANY ONE, THEY DON'T

SEE ANYONE.  THEY ONLY SEE THE SCREEN OF THEIR TECHNOLOGY

CONGRATULATIONS TECHNOLOGY.  THE CIVILITY IS GONE, THE NEW HUMANITY

KILLED IT.  THEY ARE LIKE DEAD ZOMBIES WIRED UP AND WALKING AROUND ALL

ALONE AMONGST MILLIONS OF THEIR FELLOW MEN BUT ALL ALONE BY

THEMSELVES AND THEIR WIRES....AMAZING PROGRESS.  CONGRATULATIONS

TO THE ONES TEXTING, WALKING, NOT LISTENING, NOT TALKING, NOT FEELING,

NOT CONVERSING, ALL ALONE BY THEMSELVES...."

A VERY COLD AND DARK EVENING

A VERY COLD AND DARK EVENING

WHERE IS THE REST OF YOU, YOU A VERY COLD EVENING?

DID YOU JUST DISAPPEAR FROM SIGHT?

WHAT HAPPENED?

DID SOME ONE CHASED YOU AWAY?

WHO?

THE DARKNESS...

OH! THE DARKNESS CHASED YOU AWAY

HOW MEAN OF THAT DARKNESS

HOW DARE THE DARKNESS CHASED YOU AWAY

I THOUGHT OTHING ON THIS EARTH CAN EVER CHASE YOU AWAY

I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE LIGHT

YOU WERE THE SHINING LIGHT ON THE TOP OF THE HILL

TOP OF THAT HILL WHERE PEOPLE CLIMB ALL DAY TO FIND YOU

TO DELIGHT IN YOUR SHIMMERING LIGHT

TO DELIGHT IN YOUR SOOTHING BLUE LIGHT

TO FEEL ROMANTIC IN YOUR LIGHT, THE COLOR OF THE NILE...

TO FEEL YOU AE IN THOSE ANCIENT LANDS OF MONUMENTS, PYRAMIDS AND

PROPHETS...

WHERE HAVE THE PROPHETS GONE/

WHERE HAVE ALL THE PROPHETS OF THE WORLD GONE?

THERE IS SO MUCH DARKNESS WITHOUT THE PROPHETS

THERE IS SO MUCH DARKNESS WITHOUT YOU

I APPEAL TO THE PROPHETS TO COME BACK

WE MISS THEM

WE NEED THEIR WISDOM

THEIR DIGNITY

THEIR STRENGTH

THEIR SPIRITS

THEIR GENEROSITY

THEIR SENSE OF RIGHT AND WRONG

THEIR POETRY OF JUSTICE

THEIR SONG OF PEACE

WHERE DID THE PROPHETS GO?

CAN YOU COME BACK?

CAN YOU SHINE YOUR LIGHT ON THE PROPHETS SO WE CAN SEE THEM?

I KNOW THEY ARE SOME WHERE AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HILL, HIDDEN IN THE

DARKNESS...

CAN YOU COME BACK SO THAT THE PROPHETS WILL BE VISIBLE AND THE LAND

WILL HAVE SOME MEANING LIKE BEFORE?

CAN YOU SHINE ON OUR LIBRARIES SO WE CAN READ SOME WONDERFUL BOOKS

WE ARE SO MUCH IN THE DARKNESS THAT WE SEE NOTHING BUT LONG AND DARK

SHADOWS OF DARKNESS...

CAN YOU SHINE ON OUR EARTH SO WE CAN SEE THAT IT'S FERTILE?

CAN YOU COME BACK AND SHOW US THE WAY?

WE ARE LOST

WE HAVE LOST OUR WAY

WE CAN'T SEE ANYTHING

WE ARE BUMPING INTO EACH OTHER

WE ARE HURTING EACH OTHER BECAUSE WE ARE SO MUCH IN THE DARKNESS

WE ARE NOT AT FAULT BUT WE HAVE LOST OUR LIGHT

YOU WERE OUR LIGHT AND YOU ARE GONE

WHERE HAVE YOU GONE?

WHY HAVE YOU GONE?

WHY WON'T YOU COME BACK?

HAVE WE DONE SOMETHING WRONG TO OFFEND YOU?

HAVE WE DONE SOMETHING WRONG TO ANNOY YOU?

HAVE WE DONE SOMETHING TO DISAPPOINT YOU?

YES, WE HAVE

WE HAVE LOST OUR WAY

WE HAVE LOST OUR STRENGTH

WE HAVE LOST OUR SOPHISTICATION

WE HAVE LOST OUR MORALS

WE HAVE LOST OUR DIGNITY

YES, WE HAVE LOST EVERYTHING WHICH IS DEAR TO GOD

WE HAVE LOST OUR CHARACTER.

BECAUSE WE ARE IN THE DARK.

YOU HAVE GONE AWAY

WE OFFENDED YOU

WE HURT YOUR FEELINGS

YOU SHOWED US YOUR LIGHT AND WE CHOSE DARKNESS

PLEASE COME BACK

IT'S TOO DARK WITHOUT YOU

WERN'T YOU OUR MOON?

THE MOST GLAMOROUS OF ALL LIGHTS

THE MOST PRECIOUS OF ALL THE LIGHTS

PLEASE COME BACK AND LIGHT OUR MOUNTAIN SO WE CAN CLIMB UP

WITHOUT ANY FEAR...

WE NEED TO MOVETHE DARKNESS OF IGNORANCE

MOVE UPWARDS

MOVE FORWARD

AWAY FROM THE ETERNAL DARKNESS OF IGNORANCE

AWAY FROM THE DARKNESS OF EVIL

AWAY FROM THE DARKNESS OF CRUELTY

AWAY FROM THE DARKNESS OF VIOLENCE

AWAY FROM THE DARKNESS OF HATE...

PLEASE COME BACK...

COME BACK, THE BEAUTIFUL MOON

BRING BACK YOUR SOOTHING, COMFORTING BLUISH LIGHT...

THE EVENING IS DO DARK

EVERY EVENING IS SO DARK LATELY

SO DARK, SO, SO SO DARK WITHOUT YOU...

OSCAR WILDE

OASCAR WILDE AND A NEW DAY.

"IT WOULD BE UNFAIR TO EXPECT OTHER PEOPLE TO BE

AS REMARKABLE AS ONE SELF."

"I NEVER WRITE PLAYS FOR ANY OINE.

I WRITE PLAYS TO AMUSE MYSELF.

AFTER, IF PEOPLE WANT TO ACT IN THEM, I SOME-TIMES

ALLOW THEM TO DO SO."

Oscar Wilde

"WRITING IS REALLY A WAY OF THINKING-NOT JUST FEELING,

BUT THINKING ABOUT THINGS THAT ARE DISPARATE, UNRESOLVED,

MYSTERIOUS, PROBLEMATIC OR JUST SWEET."

Toni Morrison

"KASTNER SAYS, IN ESSENCE,  " ALL RIGHT,  THE WORLKD IS FULL OF IDIOTS

AND THEY ARE IN CONTROL OF EVERY THING, YOU FOOL STAY ALIVE AND

ANNOY THEM."  AND THAT, IN A SENSE, IS MY FUNCTION IN LIFE, AND MY

CONSOLATION."

John Simon

"DO NOT COMPETE WITH THEM.  YOU ARE NOT A DU-KAN-DAR."

YOUR BUSINESS IS TO ENJOY WHATEVER YOU LIKE.

TO DO WHATEVER YOU LIKE. TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANT."

BS

"END OF THE DAY,

BEGINNING OF THE DAY."

BY
BINA SHARIF

copyright:binasharif 2019

"BEGINNING OF THE DAY"

UP IN THE MORNING

FORCE YOUR SELF TO GO FOR A WALK

CUP OF TEA DOWNSTAIRS

WALKING CLOTHES

OUT OF THE DOOR

EXCEPT RAIN OR SNOW

BE DILIGENT ABOUT IT...

NO MATTER WHAT!

NO MATTER HOW!

LISTEN TO YOUR OWN ADVICE

FOR A CHANGE.

HAVE A LOT OF CONCERN FOR YOURSELF

YOUR HEALTH, YOUR WELL BEING

EVERY ONE ELSE COMES AFTER YOU

IN THE PAST, YOU HAVE PUT EVERY ONE ABOVE YOU

THOSE DAYS ARE OVER



IT'S THE BEGGING OF A NEW DAY...

FOR YOU

ONLY FOR YOU

A BRAND NEW DAY

JUST FOR YOU...



YOU HAVE BEEN TOO GIVING

WITH YOUR LOVE

YOUR AFFECTION

YOUR TIME

YOUR VALUABLE TIME

YOUR PRECIOUS TIME

HOW DARE YOU STEAL YOUR OWN TIME FOR OTHER PEOPLE?

MOSTLY USELESS PEOPLE

REMEMBER, HOW MUCH TIME, YOUR PRECIOUS TIME, YOU HAVE WASTED ON

OTHERS?

USLESS OTHERS

SELFISH OTHERS

MEAN OTHERS

MANIPULATIVE OTHERS

WHAT WAS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT?

NO?

OK.

LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT IT...

IT'S THE BEGINNING OF A NEW DAY

A BRAND NEW DAY,

GOD CREATED FOR YOU

JUST FOR YOU

A BRAND NEW DAY...

BEGINNING OF A BRAND NEW DAY FOR YOU...

JUST FOR YOU.



THIS IS A DIFFICULT PLACE

AN UNJUST PLACE

AUTHORITARIAN PLACE

EVERY ONE WANTS TO BE PLEASED

PLEASED BY THE OTHER

"JUST PLEASE ME."

THAT'S THE PURPOSE

OF HUMAN RACE...

"JUST PLEASE ME"

"KEEP PLEASING ME."

"BE OBEDIENT"

"ALWAYS BE OBEDIENT."

"I COME FIRST..."

THEY SAY

"YES, I FOR SURE COME FIRST."

"I AM RICHER THAN YOU."

"I AM YOUNGER THAN YOU."

"I AM SLIMMER THAN YOU."

"I HAVE A CLEANING LADY."

"I HAVE A TOWN HOUSE"

"I GET MY FOOD DELIVERED."

"I HAVE A NANY"

"I GO TO THE OPERA."

"I HAVE A BANK BALANCE"

"I HAVE POWER OVER YOU"

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE?"

"TIME? "

"THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE? "

"GIVE IT TO ME"

"GIVE ME YOUR VALUELESS TIME."

"OBEY ME."

"I HAVE POWER OVER YOU."

"WHAT USE IS YOUR TIME TO YOU?"

"CLEAN MY  CLOTHES."

"GO BUY MY FOOD."

"TAKE CARE OF MY DOG."

"I WILL THROW SOME PENNIES AT YOU FOR YOUR USELESS TIME."

"AT LEAST YOU WILL HAVE A FEW PENNIES EVERY DAY."



"WHAT DO YOU HAVE NOW?"

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE NOW?'

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE NOW?"

"NOTHING

NOTHING

NOTHNG

"JUST TIME"

"THATS WAHT YOU HAVE"

"TIME?"

"WHO GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR MEANINGLESS TIME?"

SHE SAYS


"WHAT A LAUGH"


"WHAT ELSE IS YOUR TIME GOOD FOR.?"

"YOU ARE SO LUCKY THAT WE LET YOU SPEND YOUR TIME ON US."

"WE ARE IMPORTANT, YOU KNOW"

"WE HAVE MONEY, YOU KNOW"

"WE HAVE BUILDINGS, YOU KNOW"

"WE HAVE GUCCI BAGS, YOU KNOW"

"WE HAVE SEASON TICKETS FOR EVEY CONCERT,  EVERY OPERS,  EVERY OPENING

NIGHT OF A PLAY"

"WHAT DO YOU HAVE?"

"TIME", SHE SAYS

"WHAT A LAUGH"

"WHAT A LAUGH"

"WHAT A LAUGH"

"HOW DO YOU SPEND YOUR TIME MSS?"

HOW DO YOU SPEND YOUR TIME MISS?"

"HOW DO YOU SPEND YOUR TIME MISS?"



"I WASTED IT ON THE LIKES OF YOU."

"I WASTED IT ON THE MISERABLE LIKES OF  YOU."

"I WASTED IT ON THE OBNOXIOUS YOU.'

"I WASTED IT ON THE MEAN SPIRITED,  UNEDUCATED, UNSOPHISTICATED

THIEVES."

"YES, ON THIEVES."

"STOLEN MILLIONS AND THEN STOLEN TIME."

"YOU STOLE MY TIME"

"YOU STOLE MY TIME"

"YOU STOLE MY TIME."

"BUT NO MORE."

"NEVER MORE."

"IT'S THE BEGINNING OF A NEW DAY"

"A NEW DAY."

"JUST FOR ME."

"A BRAND NEW DAY."

"JUST FOR ME."

"JUST FOR ME."

"JUST FOR ME."

"TO DO WHATEVER  I WANT TO DO."

"TO DO WHATEVER I LIKE TO DO."

"TO DO WHATEVER I WISH TO DO."

"TO DO WHATEVER I DESIRE TO DO."

"WITHOUT YOU...

YES, WITHOUT YOU"

"NEVER WITH YOU AGAIN"

"NEVER...."

"I OWN MY TIME NOW."

I OWN MY DAY NOW."

I OWN THE BEGINNING OF THE DAY AND

I OWN THE END OF THE DAY."

"I AM THE SOLE OWNER OF MY NEW DAY."

"I AM THE SOLE OWNER OF THE END OF THE NEW DAY.'

I OWN MY DAYS FROM NOW ON..."

"I OWN MY TIME FROM NOW ON..."

"I AM THE OWNER..."

I OWN EVERYTHING WHICH CONCERNS ME..."

"I OWN THE BEGINNING

I OWN THE END

OF MY NEW DAY....



"EVERY DAY FROM NOW ON WILL BE THE BEGINNING OF ANEW DAY."

"EVEY EVENING FROM NOWO N WILL BE THE END OF A NEW DAY..."

"AND THE BEGINNING OF THE NEW DAY

WILL BEGIN AGAIN...."

"THE DAY WILL END

AND THE NEW DAY WILL BEGIN AGAIN"

"AND IT WILL ALL BELONG TO ME"

"ALL OF IT"

"ALL OF IT."

"ALL OF IT."

"NOT ONE MOMENT WILL BELONG TO THE LIKES OF YOU.'

"NO,  NEVER..."

"NOT ONE MOMENT."

NO, NEVER.

"NOT ONE MOMENT OF MY TIME."

WILL EVER BELONG TO YOU AGAIN.












"YOU HAVE TO OBEY ME.'

THE WINDOW

THE WINDOW:  REFLECTS GIGI'S INNER THOUGHTS
BY
BINA SHARIF

(A performance piece)

copyright::binasharif 2019

A LOVELY DOG NAMED , "GIGI" STANDING NEAR THE WINDOW LOOKING OUT ON A

WINTER NIGHT.
                           
GIGI:

LOOK AT ALL THE SLUSH OUTSIDE.

SO MUCH SNOW

SNOW IS TRYING TO MELT ITSELF BUT CAN'T DO IT ALONE.

SNOW CAN FALL ALL ALONE BY ITSELF BUT CAN'T CLEAN THE MESS.

SOME BUSINESSES HIRE PEOPLE TO DO IT BECAUSE THE OWNER--THE LANDLORD

CAN BE SUED IF SOME ONE FALLS AND BREAK THEIR BONES....BUT SOME

BUILDINGS DON'T CARE BECAUSE THEY ARE OWNED BY HORRIBLE LANDLORDS

LIKE THE BUILDING I LIVE IN WITH MY OWNER RACHAEL.


SHE IS ALWAYS COMPLAINING ABOUT HIM AND RIGHTLY SO.

MOST OF THE TIME THERE IS NO HEAT IN THE APT.

I SHIVER...

BUT I CAN'T COMPLAIN BECAUSE YOU KNOW THAT I DON'T HAVE A VOICE.

(Rachael walks in, see gigi standing near the window moving her tail, Rachael listens)

GIGI:

I WANT TO TELL THE LAMD LORD THAT HE SHOULD GIVE PROPER HEAT IN THIS

COLD-FREEZING WEATHER.

I KNOW I HAVE A BIT OF FURON ME BUT RACHAEL...

I FEEL BAD FOR HER.

SHE HAS TO WEAR LAYERS UPONN LAYERS OF CLOTHES, EVEN A THICK WOOL

SWEATER AT NIGHT AND IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA TO WEAR WOOL TO SLEEP IN...

IT ITCHES AND OVERHEATS AND THAT CAUSES SKIN PROBLEMS...

AND I TELL YOU THE CAUSE OF ALL DISEASES STARTS WITH SKIN PROBLEMS.

FIRST YOU ITCH,

THEN YOU SCRATCH

THEN YOU LOOK AT THAT SPOT WHERE YOU JUST SCRATCHED

NOW THAT BODY PART WHERE THE ITCH STARTED IS RED, BRIGHT RED LIKE A

TOMATO FROM THE FARMERS MARKET.


I LIKE FARMERS MARKET

BECAUSE THEY SELL FRESH FOOD

NO PRESERVATIVES, (At least thats what they say)

I DON'T BELIEVE PEOPLE AND WHAT THEY SAY

ESPECIALLY BUSINESS PEOPLE...

THEY THINK OF MONEY FIRST AND ABOUT PEOPLE'S HEALTH LATER OR NEVER

LIKE THE WHOLE FOOD STORE, THEY SHOULD BE CALLED WHOLE PAY CHECK

STORES...

THEY SAY, THEY ARE ORGANIC."

WHO KNOWS?

RACHAEL ALWAYS GO THERE

OF COURSE SHE TAKES ME WITH HER

I SNIFF AND SNIFF AND SMELL AND SMELL ALL THE FOOD AND I KNOW

MOST OF THE FOOD IS NOT ORGANIC BECAUSE SINCE THE WHOLE FOOD STORES

OPENED, THERE IS MORE CANCER IN THE AIR AND WHOLE FOOD STORES ARE SO

HUGE AND THERE IS SO MUCH FOOD IN THEM, HOW CAN IT BE STILL FRESH THE

NEXT DAY AND THE NEXT DAY AND THE NEXT?

THEY ARE NOT GOING TO THROW OUT ALL THAT EXPENSIVE SO CALLED, "ORGANIC"

FOOD OUT.


ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

IT'S ALL IN THE FREEZERS

COLD AS ICE

LIKE THE ICE IN THE STREETS WHERE PEOPLE ARE SLIPPING AND FALLING

AND THE AMBULANCES ARE HOWLING AND TAKING THEM TO THE EMERGENCY

ROOMS WHERE THEY SIT  FOR HOURS AND HOURS SCREAMING WITH PAIN

AND NO ONE PAYS ANY ATTENTION TO THEM.

SOME EVEN DIE ON THE EMERGENCY ROOM'S FLOOR AND PEOPLE KEEP WALKING

AND STEPPING OVER THEM.

SO THE FOOD WHICH THEY CAN'T SELL GOES INTO THE GIANT FREEZERS THE NEXT

DAY AND BECOME ICY AS THE ICE ON THE STREETS AFTER THAT MAJESTIC SNOW

FALL THE THER DAY.

NO ONE CLEANS BECAUSE THE MAYOR SAYS, "DON'T BOTHER BECAUSE THE SNOW

IS COMING BACK TOMORROW."

THE MOST DISGUSTING THING IS THE SLUSH AFTER THE SNOW MELTS

SLUSH ON THE STREET CROSSINGS, PUDDLES OF DIRTY WATER WHERE RACHAEL

DRAGS ME WITH A LONG LEASH WHILE SHE IS ON HER iPHONE.

NO ATTENTION IS PAID TO ME OR TO ANY DOG WHOSE MASTER IS ON iPHONE...

WHILE MY PAWS BECOME SO COLD AND NUMB AND I NEVER FEEL THAT I HAVE

ANY PAWS AT ALL.

AT LEAST HUMAN BEINGS, THE RICH ONES ARE ALL WEARING LONG LEATHER

DESIGNER BOOTS BUT I AM BARE FOOT...ALWAYS BARE FOOT, IN THE WINTER, IN

THE SUMMER, MY PAWS HOT AS HELL IN 100% HEAT IN AUGUST...ME WALKING ON

 THE HOT CEMENT PAVEMENTS BURNING MY PAWS BUT RACHAEL, THOUGH I LOVE

HER TO DEATH KEEPS CONCENTRATING ON HER iPHONE RATHER THAN ON MY FEET

ON FIRE.


AND ON WINTER DAYS LIKE TODAY MY WHOLE BODY GETS SOAKED WITH DIRTY

SLUSH AND THEN I SLEEP WITH HER IN HER BED, WHICH I LOVE AND FEEL VERY

GUILTY BECAUSE I MAKE HER CLEAN LINEN BEDSHEETS FILTHY DIRTY AND THEN

POOR RACHAEL HAS TO TAKE THEM TO THE LAUDRY MAN WHO RIPS HER OFF

WITH A HUGE BILL AND THAT HAPPENS AGAIN AND AGAIN BECAUSE I KEEP

MAKING....

HER SHEETS DIRTY AGAIN AND AGAIN BECAUSE IT KEEPS SNOWING AND THE

SLUSH KEEP SOAKING ME TO MY CORE.

IT KEEPS SNOWING CONSTANTLY.

IT STARTS IN SEPTEMBER SOMETIME AND KEEPS GOING TILL APRIL.


I WISH RACHAEL DOESN'T HAVE TO WORK IN ALL THOSE EXTREME WEATHER

AL THOSE SNOWY MONTHS AND THEN THE BLISTERING HEAT OF JUNE, JULY AND

AUGUST.  AUGUST IS A HEAT STROKE WEATHER AND SHE HAS TO TAKE ME OUT

TWICE A DAY NO MATTER WAHT...

POOR RACHAEL...

I KNOW SHE IS HARD CORE DEMOCRAT, A LIBERAL, VERY LIBERAL DEMOCRAT

ISN'T IT SUPPOSED TO BETTER FOR LIBERAL DEMOCRAT WESTERN WOMEN TO

NOT WORK SO HARD, NOT STRUGGLE SO MUCH, NOT TO BE SO LONELY THAT THEY

HAVE TO HAVE DOGS AND CATS INSTEAD OF HUMAN BEINGS FOR COMPANY?

I AM NOT COMPLAINING.  I AM HAPPY THAT I HAVE A HOME.  A NICE HOME

WITHOUT HEAT IN THE WINTER AND WITHOUT COOL AIR IN THE SUMMER

BUT I FEEL FOR RACHAEL...SHE IS ALWAYS ALONE, SO ALONE...

WHERE ARE ALL THE MEN GONE OR THE WOMEN GONE?  WHY EVERY ONE IS SO

ALONE?

EVERY ONE IS SO ALONE AND EVERY ONE WORKS SO HARD AND THEY LIVE IN

A LBERAL COUNTRY WITH ECONOMY BOOMING...

HERE IS THE BOOMING ECONOMY GOING?

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

"BOOMING ECONOM?"

"WHO IS IT BOOMING FOR?"

NOT FOR RACHAEL I AM SURE...NO HELP OF ANY KIND.

SHE HAS TO DO EVERYTHING BY HERSELF.

BUY HER FOOD FROM WHOLE FOOD

CARRY IT HOME

CLIMB UP SIX FLIGHTS

THEN COOK

THEN CLEAN

THEN TAKE ME OUT

I APPRECIATE THAT.

NO MATTER WHAT KIND OF WEATHER ENCOUNTERS HER...

HOT ORCOLD

SUMMER OR WINTER

RAIN AND HURRICANES...

SHE HAS TO TAKE ME OUT...

TWICE...

FEED ME, THE SAME ORGANIC FOOD SHE EATS...

THATS WHY I KNOW THAT THE FOOD SHE BUYS FROM THE ORGANIC STORES MIGHT

NT BE ORGANIC BECAUSE BOTH OF US GET SICK AT THE SAME MOMENT AFTER

DINNER.

WHEN SHE KEEPS TAKING US TO THOSE STORES, WHOLE FOOD

COMMODITY

TRADER JOE

FARMERS MARKET

I KEEP MOVING MY TAIL...

THATS MY WAY OF TALKING, OF SAYING SOMETHING IMPORTANT

BUT NO ONE GETS IT...

THEY DON'T EVER BELIEVE THAT I AM EXPRESSING MY INNER THOUGHTS BY

MOVING MY TAIL...

THEY JUST BELIEVE THAT I HAVE A BAD HABBIT OF ALWAYS MOVING MY TAIL...

MANNERISM, THEY CALL IT.

LIKE BAD ACTORS ALWAYS MIVING THEIR HANDS AND FEET ...THEY JUST CAN'T

STAY STILL.  THATS CALLED "MANNERISM" IN THE THEATER.

MAYBE THEY ARE ALSO TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING.

"ATTENTION MUST BE PAID."

BUT THATS THE ONLY THING NO ONE PAYS ANYMORE IN THIS FAST MOVING

LIBERAL WORLD.

EVERY ONE IS LITERALLY MOVING FAST,BUMPING INTO EACH OTHER

RUSHING, RUSHING, STEPPING ON MY PAWS...I HOWL WITH PAIN AND THEY KEEP

RUSHING.  WHERE ARE THEY GOING?

RUSHING TO THE SUBWAY?

RUSHING FOR AN INTERVIEW?

RUSHING FOR A DATE?

NO ONE HAS A DATE.

MY RACHAEL HAS NO DATE

NO ONE HAS A DATE.

EVERY ONE IS LONELY

THEY DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE IT BUT THEY ARE LONELY...

AT LEAST THATS MY OBSERVATION...

BUT WHO CARES ABOUT MY OBSERVATION

I AM JUST A DOG...

I JUST MOVE MY TAIL VIOLENTLY SOME TIME TO ALERT RACHAEL NOT

TO SPEND SO MUCH MONEY ON FAKE ORGANIC FOOD BUT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME.

I AM JUST A DOG

A DOG WHO CAN'T TALK

GOD GAVE ME NO TONGUE

I AM NOT HAPPY WITH GOD

I WISH I COULD TALK

AND TELL RACHAEL NOT TO WASTE HER HARD EARNED DOLLARS ON

"ORGANIC FOOD"  RIP OFF OF THE CENTURY.

I LOVE RACHAEL

I FEEL FOR HER

I WANT HER TO ENJOY

TO NT SPEND SO MUCH ON USELESS THINGS

JUST REST

READ, TRAVEL, ENJOY MUSIC, NOT WORRY SO MUCH ABOUT ILLNESSES,

EAT ORDINARY FOOD, AS GOOD AS THE FAKE ORGANIC, SAVE HER MONEY,

FIND A BOY FRIEND OR A GIRL FRIEND, WHATEVER SHE LIKES, BE HAPPY,

IT'S THE SAME BANANA WHICH YOU PAY 25 CENTS FOR AND IT'S THE SAME BANANA

WHICH SHE PAYS TWO DOLLARS FOR.  OH! THE FAKE ORGANIC BUSINESS IS RIPPING

 MY RACHAEL OFF. SHE DOEN'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE SLUSH AND SNOW TO

WHOLE FOOD STORE WHICH IS SO FAR AWAY DRAGGING ME BEHIND HER, SHE CAN

JUST GO TO THE BODEGA ON THE STREET CORNER...

WE, BOTH ARE GOINGB TO GET SICK ANY WAY RIGHT AFTER WE EAT SO WHAT'S THE

DIFFERENCE?

BUT NO ONE LISTEN TO ME

BECAUSE I AM JUST A DOG

YES, I AM A DOG

MY NAME IS ,"GIGI"

BECAUSE I AM A FRENCH DOG

THE FRENCH PART OF MY STORY I WILL COME TO LATER ON...

WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY WITH MY MOVING TAIL IS, THAT RACHAEL AND EVERY

ONE ELSE SHOULD NOT BELIEVE WHATEVER THE ADVERTISERS TELL YOU.

IAM A DOG AND EVEN I KNOW THAT THEY ARE LIERS LIKE EVRY ONE ELSE

ND THEY ARE ALL MAKING RACHAEL WORK SO HARD WITHOUT ANY POSITIVE

RESULTS.

SHE IS SICK A LOT.  COLD AND COUGH AND THEN COLD AND COUGH ALL YEAR

LONG...THEN VISITS TO THE DOCTORS, ALL THOSE CO-PAYS, LUCKILY SHE HAS

HEALTH INSURANCE BUT MAYBE IT'S NOT SO LUCKY BECAUSE BEFORE SHE HAD

HEALTH INSURANCE, SHE WAS HARDLY SICK NOW ALL HER MONEY IS GOING FOR

CO-PAY...CO-PAY AND ANOTHER CO-PAY...

I THROW UP OFTEN

SHE TAKES ME TO THE THE VET...DOG DOCTOR...SPENDS A LOT OF MONEY

BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE ANY HEALTH INSURANCE

I AM JUST A DOG

ONLY HUMAN BEINGS HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE

BUT ALL HUMAN BEINGS HERE IN THIS LIBERAL CIVILIZATION DON'T HAVE

HEALTH INSURANCE...

MAYBE THAY ARE NOT HUMAN AT ALL

MAYBE THAY ARE ALSO DOGS LIKE ME.

ONLY DOGS DON'T HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE

I DON'T UNDERSTAND MUCH

I DIDN'T GO TO COLLEGE

BUT I KNOW A THING OR TWO

RACHAEL READ SHORT STORIES TO ME AT NIGHT

AND I LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM THOSE SHORT STORIES.

SHE WAS READING SOMETHING FROM A RUSSIAN WRITER

WHO WAS ALSO A DOCTOR

AND HE SAID IN HIS SHORT STORY

THAT ALL ILLNESSES COME FORM THE FOOD AND FROM THE WEATHER.

AND ALL I WANT TO SAY TO RACHAEL WHOM I ADORE IS NOT TO GO OUT

DURING THHE SNOW AND SLUSH AND DON'T SPEND SO MUCH MONEY ON ORGANIC

FOOD BECAUSE BOTH THESE THINGS ARE TAKING US TO DOCTORS WHERE SHE HAS

TO SPEND HER WHOLE PAY CHECK AND THATS WHY SHE IS ALWAYS WORKING SO

HARD AND GETTING SICK SO MUCH...


BT NO ONE LISTENS TO ME

I AM JUST A DOG

GOD GAVE ME NO VOCE

OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE REVOLTED AGAINST EVERYTHING

AND CREATED A REVOLUTION LIKE IN RUSSIA AND FRANCE

I KNOW ABOUT FRANCE...

BECAUSE I AM A RENCH DOG

MY NAME IS GIGI

AND A FRENCH MAN MAN, MY OWNER ABANDONED ME . ON THE STREET...

AND I HAVEN'T YET RECOVERED FROM THAT ABANDONMENT .

I WILL TELL ABOUT IT LATER ON

BECAUSE RACHAEL MUST BE COMING HOME SOON

AND I HAVE TO GO OUT WITH HER IN THIS SLUSHY DAY

WHAT A LIFE WE BOTH HAVE

ME AND RACHAEL

RACHAEL, A HUMAN BEING

ME, A DOG

BUT OUR LIFE SEEMS IDENTICAL...

WE ARE TWINS...

FROM THE ANIMAL KINGDOM

SO WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE PROGRESS?

IF WE BOTH ARE STILL FROM THE ANIMAL KINGDOM?

I THROW UP A

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY CONTINUES

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY CONTINUES: A.K.A "THE RED LEAK"

SYBIL:

I AM SORRY NOW.

I AM SORY THAT I GOT STUCK A FLOOR ABOVE YOU

I AM SORRY THAT I DON'T HAVE A GUN.  MAYBE I SHOULD GO TO THE MAYOR'S OFFICE TOMORROW TO COMPLAIN ABOUT YOU...
(John mumbles and leave...he mumbles a lot because he is a lier)

MAYBE HE WILL LISTEN.  HE LIKES WOMEN OF COLOR.  HIS WIFE IS ONE OF THEM.  HE MIGHT HAVE MORE COMPASSION
THEN ANY OTHERS I HAVE BEEN WASTING MY TIME  WITH.

YOU KNOW IT'S AMAZING.  I NEVER EVER REALIZED THAT I CAME HERE TO AMERICA TO WASTE MY TIME.  MY PRECIOUS TIME.  MY LIFE FORCE ON SHIT LIKE THIS.  SHIT AFTER SHIT AFTER SHIT.  ONE SHIT ENDS AND THE NEXT SHIT STARTS.

MAYBE I SHOULD WRITE ABOUT SHIT "HI, MY NEW PIECE IS ABOUT SHIT. I'T'S PART OF A TRILOGY.  SHIT TRILOGY. WHAT A GREAT TITLE," SHIT TRILOGY." BY SYBIL
COMING UP AT A THEATER NEAR YOU. NO, OT IN A NON PROFIT THEATER BUT PROFIT, PROFIT, BIG, BIG PROFIT THEATER."

BUT RIGHT NOW I AM STUCK WITH THIS MOTHER FUCKER.
WHAT THE FUCK DID I DO WRONG?
SINCE I CAME HERE THINGS KEEP GOING DOWN AND DOWN.
I GUESS WASN'T MEANT FOR THE WESTERN CLIMATE.  CLIMATE OF AGGRESSION.
HE IS THE WORST, OST UNHAPPY.  HE NEEDS SEX. ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT THE LEAK.  MAYBE HE HIMSELF IS LEAKING SOMEWHERE.  SOMETHING IS FOR SURE LEAKING IN HIM.

BUT I FOR SURE HAVE A SHITTY LIFE LIVING AMONG THIS ASS HOLE.
HE BOTHERS ME ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT 24/7
HE HEARS ME COME IN AND GETS STARTED.
OH! FUCK HIM....
I HAVE A PLAY BOOKED FINALLY ON BROADWAY.
I HAVE TO CONCENTRATE.
WRITE A BRAND NEW PLAY OR FIND THE UNFINISHED ONES AND FINISH AT LEAST ONE AND FUCKING SUBMIT IT...LET ME LOOK ONE MORE TIME...MAYBE THE FUCK WON'T COME BACK.  MAYBE HE WENT TO SLEEP.  I HOPEHE DIES IN HIS SLEEP, SO I WON'T HAVE TO SHOOT HIM...SO MUCH WORK...BUY A GUN, SHOOT HIM, GO TO JAIL
AND STILL WORRY ABOUT THE ONE CHANCE IN LIFE TO HAVE A PLAY PRODUCED ON BROADWAY...MYBE THE PLAY HAS TO BE WRITTEN IN JAIL. HE WON'T BOTHER ME THERE.  HE WOULD BE DEAD.  SHOT DEAD BY ME.  DEAD PEOPLE DON'T BOTHER YOU.  THATS THE ONLY THING GOOD ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S DEATH.  PEOPLE ARE HORRIBLE..."HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE."  WHO SAID THAT?  SOME FRENCH PHILOSOPHER...MY MIND IS FROZEN RIGHT NOW.  I CAN'T THINK OF HIS NAME.
BUT HE WAS RIGHT.  HE MUST HAVE KNOWN MY FASCIT NEIGHBOR.  I AM SURE HE MEANT HIM WHEN HE SAID, "HELL IS OTHER PEOPLE."

FUCK HIM FOR NOW, LET ME FIND SOME PAGES OF ANY OF MYUN-FINISHED PLAYS.
(She searches in her huge bags, pick up some scripts, starts to read)

1:SYBIL'S DESPAIR, (READ some pages, scenes between sybil and therapist, sybil in class room, sybil with noel)

(SOUND OF BANGING THE PIPES)
(KNOCK AT THE DOOR)

SYBIL:

HE IS BACK AGAIN

(goes and open the door a crack)

JOHN (back at the door)

THERE IS A LEAK COMING

SYBIL:

A LEAK?

JOHN:

YES, A LEAK

SYBIL;

FROM WHERE?

JOHN:

FROM YOU

SYBIL:

FROM ME?

JOHN:

YES, FROM YOU

SYBIL:

I HAVEN'T PISSED ON YOU YET...

JOHN:

WHAT?

SYBIL:

I HAVE TO PISS ON YOU AND PISS A LOT FOR YOU TO HAVE A LEAK COMING FROM ME TO YOU, OTHER WISE THE POSSIBILITY OF ANY LEAK COMING FROM HERE IS A MYTH

JOHN:

MY WALLS ARE GETTING MILDOO FROM THE LEAK COMING FROM YOU.

SYBIL;

YOU HAVE AN OBSESSION WITH THE WORD, "LEAK" I AM SURE YOU HAD A BAD CHILDHOOD AND SOME ONE PISSED ON YOU A LOT AND HERE I AM THE ONE WHO GOT STUCK WITH YOU INSTED OF YOUR FUCKING MOTHER.
(Sybil scream and scream)

 GO AWAY.  GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK.  LEAVE ME THE FUCK alone.
I HAVE IMPORTANT WORK TO DO AT LEAST ONCE IN MY USELESS LIFE....
(shut the door on him.  she is totally exhausted now, she has difficulty breathing)

SYBIL;

JESUS CHRIST.  I CAN'T BREATH. I CAN'T BREATH HERE AND IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE MY HOME.  I CAN'T BREATH HERE,  I CAN'T BATHE HERE IN MY OWN HOME.  I CAN'T WORK HERE IN MY OWN APT.  I CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON ANYTHING EXCEPT THIS MOTHER FUCKER. I AM GOING TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK FOR SURE IF HE COMES BACK ANOTHER TIME. I NEED TO GO TO A THERAPIST BEFORE I DIE.

(next night)

SYBIL:

I WENT TO A THERAPIST TODAY.  I TOLD HER THAT I HAVE MOUNTAINS OF DESPAIR.
I TOLD HER THAT I SLEEP WITH DESPAIR, I WAKE UP WITH DESPAIR.  I HAVE NOTHING
ANY MORE IN MY LIFE EXCEPT DESPAIR AND MY NEIGHBOR WHO IS A MONSTER.
I CAN'T WASH MY FACE BECAUSE OF THE MONSTER.  I CAN'T WORK AT ALL.  CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON ANY CREATIVE IDEA.  FORGET ABOUT WRITING THE PULITZER WINNING PLAY EVEN IF I HANG MYSELF WITH OPTIMISM AND POSITIVE ATTITUDE.
AND WHAT DID THE THERAPIST TOLD ME?

SHE SAID, "READ CAMUS.  ALBERT CAMUS.  THE FRENCH PHILOSOPHER.  SHE SAID
CAMUS WILL INSPIRE YOU SO MUCH THAT YOU WILL COMPLETELY FORGET ABOUT YOUR NEIGHBOR AND WILL END UP WRITING A NEW PLAY. SHE TOLD ME TO TRY IT.  SHE TOLD ME THAT HER ADVICE HAD MADE MANY UNKNOWN PLAYWRIGHTS INTO
THE WORLD FAMOUS OLIVER AWARD WINNERS...JUST BY TELLING THEM TO TEAD CAMUS...SO I BOUGHT THIS BOOK BY CAMUS ON MY WAY HOME...

(She begins to read quotations of camus out loud) (Camus's quotations have to be added here)
(all of a sudden, she takes a few sheets of paper and pen and starts to write.  she writes a new short play named, PREDICTION
(She reads out loud her new play)

SYBIL:

WOW, WOW, WOW, THERAPIST WAS RIGHT, A NEW IDEA JUST HIT MY TIRED BARAIN
AND LOOK WHAT CAME OUT OF IT...(She reads) . (The play PREDICTION has to be added here)

MY GOODNESS, CAMUS IS AMAZING, SO INSPIRING.  MY FAITH IN THERAPY IS RENEWED. ( read Camus again...more quotations...starts to write, write another short play titled,
FUN PLAY) (fun play has to be added here)

FUN PLAY;

(Knock at the door again, a piece of paper slips in under the door.  it's a bill of $6000 for repairs from the neighbor)
(Sybil opens the envelope ...a bill of $6000, includes, repair of all kinds of the neighbor's apt which she has to pay...Sybil has a breakdown)

SYBIL:

OH! FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK
FUCK...(she screams and screams)

OH! WHY THE FUCK I CAME HERE?

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

LEAVE THIS COUNTRY RIGHT AWAY

LEAVE

LEAVE

LEAVE

GET OUT

GET OUT

OH! JEE, MY DEAD LINE OF THE PLAY

SHOULD I JUST TAKE SLEEPING PILLS AND DIE?

BUT I DON'T HAVE THE FUCKING SLEEPING PILLS

EVERY ONE HERE HAVE SLEEPING PILLS BUT ME

NO GUN, NO SLEEPING PILLS...

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THIS COUNTRY?

MAYBE HANG MYSELF WITH A ROPE

WHERE IS THE ROPE?

NO ROPE EITHER...

NO PREPARED AT ALL IN THIS MODERN CITY OF CHOICES

HAVE NOTHING MEANINGFUL IN MY SHITTY EXISTENCE

NO EMERGENCY PROPS TO KILL MYSELF

MAYBE A BED SHEET...

BUT THERE IS NO PIPE ON THE CEILING

I WONDER HOW EPSTEIN DID IT?

MAYBE SOME ONE SHOULD COME IN, STRANGLE ME AND THEN MAKE A NOOSE

AROUND MY NECK WITH THE SHEET...

MAYBE I SHOULD ASK THE MONSTER NEIGHBOR TO STRANGLE ME?

BUT WHY WOULD HE DO IT BEFORE I PAY HIM $6OOO?

MONEY IS MORE IMPORTANT HERE THAN KILLING

MAYBE MONEY FIRST AND THEN COMES THE KILLING

SHOULD I HAVE A HNDLE ON MYSELF AND FORGET ABOUT THE BILL

AND CONCENTRATE ON BROADWAY BOOKING?

FORGET ABOUT THE BILL SYBIL

FORGET ABOUT THE BILL

HOW CAN I FUCKING FORGET ABOUT THE BILL?

$6000 DOLLARS, IT'S 6000 DOLLARS

HOW CAN I FUCKING FORGET ABOUT THIS BILL, THE MOTHER OF ALL BILLS?

THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE SEEN THIS KIND OFA FIGURE ABUT MONEY IN ANY

FORMAT

$6000, THIS AMOUNT FOR SURE WILL KILL ME

SO FINALLY I WILL BE DEAD SOON ANY WAY

NO NEED OF A GUN OR PILLS OR A ROPE.

DEATH IS DEFINITE.

SO MAYBE I SHOULD WRTE MY PULITZER PRIZE WINNER WHICH IS BEING

CONSIDERED FOR PRODUCTION ON BROADWAY AND IF I DIE BEFORE IT OPENS,

MAYBE IT WILL BECOME A BIG HIT, SYMPATHY FACTOR WILL FOR SURE COME IN...

I CAN JUST IMAGINE THE HEADLINES, "THE GREATEST PLAY EVER WRITTEN,

AUTHOR DIED BEFORE THE SHOW OPENED..."

JUST LIKE THE PLAY RENT.  THE AUTHOR DIED BEFORE THE OPENING NIGHT

AND LOOK AT THE SUCCESS...IN THAT CASE IT WOULD BE A VERY GOOD IDEA TO DIE

BUT LET ME FINISH THE PLAY, THE ONE I STARTED, THE ONE INSPIRED BY

CAMUS,THE ONE CALLED, "THE FUN PLAY" MY LAST PLAY, THE FUN PLAY...

(starts to look for the papers and the pen, )

HERE IT IS...(Starts to write) . (Silence for a while, she writes and writes)

(then comes another knock) (Off stage)

JOHN:

YOU HAVEN'T PAID THE REPAIR BILL OF $6000 YET AND THE NEW LEAK IS COMING

ALREADY...

SYBIL:

(sit silent for a while, then has a thought and compose her self and goes to the door and open the door a bit, John is visible now)

SYBIL:

A NEW LEAK IS COMING?

JOHN:

YES, A BRAND NEW LEAK

SYBIL:

OH! A BRAND NEW LEAK IS COMING TO YOU FROM WHERE?

JOHN:

FROM YOU

SYBIL:

FROM ME?

JOHN:

YES, FROM YOU

SYBIL:

OH! I SEE...

JOHN:

I WILL HAVE TO REPAIR THE DAMAGE FROM THE NEW LEAK AS WELL.

THE BILL WILL BE MUCH HIGHER. THE NEW MILDOO, THE NEW DEMOLITION...

SYBIL:

I HAVE NOTICED YOU LOVE CERTAIN WORDS, SUCH AS LEAK, DEMOLITION..

JOHN:

I DON'T LOVE THESE WORDS.  YOU ARE GIVING ME THE THE LEAK, THE MOULDING,

THE DEMOLITION...

SYBIL:

YOU WANT THE LEAK?

JOHN:

YOU GAVE IT TO ME TWICE

SYBIL:

THERE IS ALWAYS A THIRD TIME, THIRD STRIKE AND YOU ARE OUT...

JUST WAIT HERE, I AM GOING TO PAY YOU THE $6000 FOR THE LEAK, THE REPAIR,

FOR THE DEMOLITION AND I WOULD ADD MORE MONEY TO THE BILL OF $6000

FOR THE NEW LEAK AS WELL.  JUST WAIT RIGHT OUTSIDE THE DOOR AND I WILL

BRING YOU THE CHECK SO THE HEADACHE WILL BE OVER FOR EVER.  ALRIGHT?

JOHN:

(confused and smirks)

ALRIGHT...

SYBIL:

JUST WAIT OUTSIDE THE DOOR...

JOHN:

OK.  (goes out of the room)

SYBIL:

CLOSE THE DOOR BEHIND YOU.  I WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH THE CHECK.

JOHN:  (closes thedoor behind him

SYBIL:

(goes o the writing table, take the checkbook out and writes...then she goes to another room and comes back with a huge sharp knife)

SYBIL:

HERE IS YOUR CHECK...

(Opens the door and with a grand thrust of the knife pierce his heart and keep stabbing him like
a ferociously mad Bacchante...music from Psycho, the curtain scene mixed with screams come on
after she has stabbed him many times, she comes back in, she is soaking with red blood, her dress is completely covered, she brings the bloody knife  as well as a small bucket full of red liquid with her when she enters her room and puts the knife under the table and brings a bigger bucket out of the other room and starts to pour the red liquid from smaller container into the bigger bucket...

SYBIL:

(while she pours the red liquid into the bigger bucket she says,

NOW HE'S  GOT A REAL LEAK AND THE LEAK IS RED.

(She goes back to the writing table. sit for a while in silence. )

SYBIL:

THE DISTURBANCE HAS BEEN TAKEN CARE OF ...AND I CAN WRITE MY

NEW PLAY WITHOUT ANY DISTRACTIONS.

THE PLAY WHICH WILL OPEN ALL DOORS, DOORS OF SUCCESS AND FAME AND

PRESTIGE

.PEOPLE ALL OVER THE WORLD WILL KNOW MY NAME FINALLY.

HE GOT THE RED LEAK AND I WILL WRITE MY PRECIOUS NEW PLAY.

"ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WEL"

(She speaks out loud)

THE RED LEAK...

THE RED LEAK

THE RED LEAK...

OH! MY LORD... WHAT A GREAT PHRASE. "THE RED LEAK"  THE RED LEAK"

THAT IS GOING TOBE THE TITLE OF MY NEW PLAY...

(She sits down and starts to write and speaks out the words)

'TE RED LEAK
BY
SYBIL

TIME  :PRESENT

PLACE:  DILAPIDATED BUILDING IN THE EAST VILLAGE, MANHATTAN

CHARACTERS:

NAFISA: AN IMMIGRANT WOMAN OF COLOR

SMITH:  WHITE RACIST AMERICAN MALE, NAFISA'S NEIGHBOR WHO LIVES BELOW

HER APT...

LOUD BANGING AT NAFISA'S DOOR AS THE LIGHTS GOING DOWN

                                 BLACK OUT

                                 END OF PLAY.

A DREAM PLAY CONTINUESTHERAPY OF

THERAPY OF DREAM PLAY CONTINUES

DIRECTIONS;

Big writing table in the center

 A few books on the table including a book by ALBERT CAMUS

Lots of scripts on the table as well.

A huge bag near the table full of scripts and papers full of notes

A chair

A chez divan upstage

(Sybil enters carrying a big heavy shoulder bag.

classical music is playing

She starts searching from her pile of scripts

she search for some particular script from the bag on the floor.

finally picks up CAMUS BOOK AND STARTS TO READ IT...

(SCENE ABOUT QUOTATIONS OF CAMUS)

(FINALLY SHE STARTS TO TALK)

SYBIL:

I AM LOOKING FOR A PLAY.  I KNOW I WROTE IT A WHILE AGO.

I KNOW I DIDN'T FINISH IT BUT I REMEMBER THAT I STARTED IT.

ACTUALLY I STARTED MANY PLAYS BUT DIDN'T FINISH MOST OF THEM

BECAUSE I COULD NEVER FIND THE UN-FINISHED SCRIPTS.

I HAD PUT IT IN A HUGE BAG LIKE THIS ONE...

I HAVE MANY HUGE BAGS IN THE ATTIC.

BUT I HAVE NO IDEA IN WHICH BAG DID i PUT MY UNFINISHED PLAYS,

THE ONES I AM LOOKING FOR RIGHT NOW.

I HAVE TO FIND THOSE PLAYS SO I CAN FINISH ONE OF THEM AND GET READY

FOR THE DEAD LINE. BELIEVE IT OR NOT BUT FINALLY MY PLAY HAS BEEN

BOOKED IN A HUGE THEATER WITH THOUSANDS OF SEATS WHICH WILL BE ALL

FILLED BY MY BRILLIANT NEW PLAY.

THERE IS NO AUDIENCE YET BECAUSE THERE IS NO PLAY YET.

I HAVE TO FIND IT FIRST AND THEN TAKE ALL THE ILLNESS OUT OF THE PLAY

IT'S CALLED ,"DRAMATURGY" BUT I CALL IT , THERAPY OF THE PLAY.

EVEN THE PLAYS NEED THERAPY LIKE ALL HMAN BEINGS.  WE ARE ALL SICK

AND WE CLAIM TO WRITE PLAYS SO THE PLAYS HAVE TO BE SICK AS WELL.

I AM THE PLAY DOCTOR AS WELL

I DO TE THERAPY OF THE PROBLEMS IN THE PLAY AND I HAVE SO MANY PLAYS

HIDDEN IN THE ATTIC, IF ONLY IF I COULD FIND SOME OF THEM BECAUSE NOW

IT'S URGENT BECAUSE I HAVE DEADLINE.  PLAY IS BOOKED...

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?

A WOMAN OF COLOR, AN IMMIGRANT WOMAN, NOT SO TALL, NOT SO THIN,

NOT SO YOUNG AND HER PLAY IS BOOKED IN A HUGE THEATER AFTER

TRYING FOR THIRTY YEARS AND NOW I CAN'T FIND THAT PARTICULAR

PLAY WHICH WILL FILL THE THEATER AND I WILL BE ON MY WAY TO THE WHOLE

STARDOM BUSINESS...AND NOW I CAN'T FIND IT...

(Looks in the bags)  (A persistent loud knock at te door)

SYBIL:

WHO IS IT?

JOHN:

JOHN...

SYBIL:

JOHN WHO?

JOHN:

YOUR DOWNSTAIR NEIGHBOR...

SYBIL: (Goes to the door and open it a crack.  John peeks through)

WHAT DO YOU WANT?

JOHN:

YOU ARE MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE

SYBIL:

I AM MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE?  I AM MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE?

ARE YOU HARASSING  ME AS USUAL? DO YOU HEAR A BAND PLAYING IN

MY PLACE? DO YOU SEE A ROCK OPERA BEING PERFORMED HERE?

DO YOU HEAR DRUMS BEATING? GET OFF MY BACK.  YOU HAVE BEEN

BOTHERING E FOR YOU FALSE ACCUSATIONS FOR 25 YEARS.

 AM THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS FUCKING BUILDING WHO MAKES THE LEAST NOISE.

I AM THE ONLY TENANT IN THIS LOUSY PLACE STUCK ON A FLOOR ABOE YOU

UNFORTUNATELY WHO IS ALWAYS QUIET LKE A PERSON IN A COMA...

I AM THE ONLY PERSON IN THIS GODFORSAKEN BUILDING WHO HAS NO TV, NO

ROOM MATE, NO STEREO, NO CHILDREN RUNNING AROUND, NO PETS, NO DOG

LIKE YOU, YOU WHO HAVE A FEROCIOUS DOG WHO BARKS ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT

AND YOU FUCKING SCARE ME WITH THAT AWFUL DOG BECAUSE YOU KNOW THAT I

AM FRIGHTENED BY YOUR DOG AND YOU HARASS ME AND HARASS ME AND

HARASS ME AND THE FUCKING MANAGEMENT DOESN'T DO ANYTHING.

IT IS YOU WHO . MAKE NOISE, IT IS...

 YOU AND YOUR ILLEGAL AIRBNB RENTALS WHO MAKE NOISE...GET LOST AND

NEVER COME BACK AGAIN OTHERWISE...

JOHN:

(Loudly)

ITS YOU WHO MAKE NOISE, YOU ALWAYS MAKE TOO MUCH NOISE WHEN YOU WALK

INSIDE YOUR APARTMENT...

SYBIL:  (Hysterical)

GET LOST, YOU MONSTER, GET LOST.  GO AWAY.  YOU HAVE DRIVEN ME CRAZY

FOR YEARS.  YOU ARE THE REASON THAT I CAN'T FUNCTION IN MY OWN HOME.

YOU HAVE BEEN KNOCKING AT MY DOOR FOR THIS OR THAT FOR QUATER OF A

CENTURY. GET LOST OR I WILL...

JOHN:

WHAT WILL YOU DO?  SHOOT ME? YOU COLORED BITCH

SYBIL: (Shut the door on him)

THE REASON  I HAVEN'T FINISHED ANY OF MY PLAYS, THE REASON I CAN'T FIND

ANY OF MY PLAYS IS HIM.  I HAVE A MONSTER ON MY BACK FOR YEARS AND YEARS.

DID YOU HEAR ANY NOISE EXCEPT THE BARKING OF THE DOG?

DID YOU SEE ME MAKING ANY NOISE?

WHEN I COMPLAIN TO THE RACIST MANAGEMENT THEY HANG UP ON ME CALLING

ME, HYSTERICAL" WHO WOULDN'T BE HYSTERICAL DEALING WITH SUCH AN

AWFUL NEIGHBOR?

THE MANAGEMENT HAS AN EXCUSE.  THEY HATE IMMIGRANTS, THEY HATE PEOPLE

OF COLOR.  THEY HATE WOMEN.  THEY LIKE HIM.  THIS WHITE PURE AMERICAN

FELLOW LIKE THEM.

THEY ALWAYS ACCUSE ME FOR YELLING.  "YOU ARE YELLING."  "DON'T YELL"

YOU ARE YELLING" STOP YELLING" "YOU ARE YELLING" . AND THEN THEY HANG UP

ON ME.  THEY JUST WANT ME TO GET OUT SO THEY AN HAVE A RICH NEW YORKE

WHO CAN PAY 5 THOUSAND A MONTH.  WHERE AM I GOING TO GO?  SO I FUCKING

TAKE THE ABUSE DAY AND NIGHT.  HOW CAN I CONCENTRATE ON MY

PLAYWRITING?  HE KEEPS ACCUSING ME BLATANTLY RIGHT TO MY FACE TO

DISTURB ME, TO AGITATE ME AND TRUST ME I DO GET DISTURBED.

I AM AN ARTIST.

I AM ALSO A THIN SKINNED IMMIGRANT ARTIST WHO IS ON THE DARKER SIDE.

I AM AN IMMIGRANT WOMAN OF COLOR ARTIST AND HE IS PURE, WHITE AMERICAN

IT'S HIS COUNTRY.  HE CAN BOTHER ME.  IT'S HIS FUCKING RIGHT.

WHEN I COMPLAIN TO THE MANAGEMENT ABOUT THIS NEIGHBOR'S HARASSMENT,

THEY SAY, "PROVE IT...PROVE IT."  HOW AM I GOING TO PROVE IT?

MY PROOF OF HIS HARASSMENT IS THAT I HAVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO

CONCENTRATE FULLY O FINISH A PLAY.

I START A PLAY, I WRITE A SCENE OR TWO AND HERE COME

THE BANGING ON THE PIPPES, (sound of banging on the pipe)

SYBIL:

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

JOHN: (0ff stage)

WATER IS COMING DOWN

SYBIL:

WHAT?

JOHN:  (stick his head in the door which Sybil forgot to lock)

WATER IS COMING DOWN TO MY BATHROOM FROM A LEAK

IN YOUR BATHROOM

SYBIL:

(To the audience)

DO YOU SEE ANY LEAK COMING DOWN?

DO YOU SEE ANY BATHROOM HERE/

DID YOU SEE ME OPENING A WATER TAP?

DID YOU SEE ME WASHING MY FACE?

DID YOU SEE ME BRUSH MY TEETH?

DID YOU SEE ME WATER MY PLANT?

DID YOU SEE ME DRINKING ANY WATER?

I AM ALWAYS DEHYDRATED, AFRAID OF TURNING

THE WATER ON IN CASE THE MONSTER ACCUSE ME

OF A DAMN LEAK...

HE IS BEEN FALSLY ACCUSING ME OF A LEAK COMING

FROM MY BATHROOM TO HIS FUCKING WALLS OR CEILING

OR FLOOR AD THE MANAGEMENT DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT

I AM SO AFRAID OF THIS MOTHER FUCKER IN AN MANHATTAN APT

THAT I HAVE LOCKED MY BATHROOM...

I AM NOT ALLOWED IN BY MY OWN RULING.

I DO NOT TURN ANY WATER ON...

I HAVEN'T TAKEN A SHOWER SINCE A YEAR.

I AM SO DIRTY NOW THAT I SMELL LIKE A RAT

I AM SURE YOU SMELLED SOMETHING ROTTEN WHEN YOU CAME IN

THATS ME

SMELLY ME

FILTHY ME

WHEN I IMMIGRATED HERE IN THIS DREAMLAND

I SMELLED LIKE THE PERFUMES OF ARABIA

NOW I SMELL ROTTEN

NOW I SMELL LIKE SHIT

HE IS ALWAYS ACCUSING ME OF A LEAK...

MAYBE HE HIMSELF IS LEAKING SOME STUFF INSIDE HIS PANTS

AND ACCUSING ME INSTEAD.

MAYBE THIS BASTARD IS SUFFERING FROM SOME ILLNESS

WHERE HE IMAGINES LEAKS AND SOUNDS OF THE DRUMS,

LOUD TV

AND PEOPLE SHOUTING AT EACH OTHER IN MY APT

DO YOU SEE ANY ONE ELSE HERE BESIDE ME?

IT'S ME WHO SHOUTS AFTER HE BOTHERS ME CONSTANTLY

AND IT'S ONLY ME WHO SHOUTS (shouts and shouts) AND SHOUTS

AND KEEP SHOUTING LIKE A MAD WOMAN...

DO YOU SEE ANY TV HERE?

DO YOU HEAR ANY MUSIC PLAYING/

I LOVE MUSIC

I ALWAYS USED TO LISTEN TO MUSIC AND DANCE WITH IT

I HAVE SO MANY CD'S, THOUGH THEY ARE OUT OF FASHION

BUT I HAVE THEM IN MY ATTIC...

I HAVE ALGERIAN MUSIC, NIGERIAN MUSIC, LATIN AMERICAN MUSIC,

PUNJABI MUSIC, URDU MUSIC, PERSIAN MUSIC, INDIAN BHNGRA MUSIC,

BEATLES, DOORS, MO TOWN MUSIC, OH! HOW I LOVE THAT MUSIC...

WHEN I IMMIGRATED HERE THIS WAS NOT THE LAND OF HORROR

BECAUSE THERE WERE NO HORRIBLE NEIGHBORS...

THEY DIDN'T LIVE IN THE EAST VILLAGE

THEY WERE TOO RICH TO LIVE IN THE EAST VILLAGE

I USED TO TAKE TWO SHOWERS A DAY...

BLAST MY CHARLES BROWN AND DIANA ROSS

AND TAKE SHOWERS AND THEN DANCE NAKED...

THAT WAS FREEDOM

AMERICAN FREEDOM

THERE WERE HOMELESS PEOPLE IN THE PARK

THEY WERE MY FRIENDS

I WILL BRING SHERRY, MY HOMELESS GIRL FRIEND

AND TELL HER TO FEEL FREE TO TAKE A SHOWER

AND SHE WOULD OFTEN

AND THEN I WOULD MAKE HER A CUP OF TEA

AND WE WOULD SMOKE CIGARETTES...

NO, I DIDN'T SMOKE MARIUANA...

IT WASN'T SO GOOD HERE, STALE TASTE

ONLY IN MY COUNTRY WHERE WOMEN ARE CONSIDERED

OPPRESSED BY WESTERN STANDARDS

ONLY THERE I SMOKED JOINTS WTH ONE OF MY COUSINS

WE WOULD GET HIGH AND THEN TAKE A RIDE IN HIS OPEN SPORTS

CAR AND LAUGH AND LAUGH AND LAUGH

MY JET BLACK LONG HAIR WOULD FLOW WITH THE WIND

LIKE IN THE MOVIES

AND THEN WE WOULD STOP ON THE ROADSIDE TO HAVE

GHARAM, GHRAM JALEIBIES...A SWEET, HOT AND MELTING

WITH HONEY.

AFTER ONE GETS HIGH ONE WANTS SWEETS...

THATS HOW IT WAS BACK HOME...

I WONDER WHY I CAME HER?

THIS QUESTION BOTHERS ME

PEOPLE COME HERE FOR FREEDOM

BUT I WWAS TAKING A RIDE IN A SPORTS CAR

STONED LIKE CRAZY, LAUGHING LIKE CRAZY

AND HAD NO FUCKING NEIGHBOR ...TO HARASS ME 24/7

WITHE HOMELESS IN THE EAST VILLAGE I FELT MUCH MORE FREE

THEN THESE RICH CRIMINALS BOTHERING US THE FEW REMAINING

ARTISTS IN THIS REAL ESTATE HEAVEN...

I WISH I COULD JUST GET AWAY FROM HIM

HOW THE FUCK DID I GET STUCK ABOVE HIM?

(noise of banging on the door)

SYBIL:

(to John who is at her door again)

I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE...

JOHN: (stick his head in the door)

(Smirking)

WHAT WILL YOU DO?  WHAT WILL YOU DO?  SHOOT ME? HAHAHAHA

SYBIL:

DO YOU WANT ME TO SHOOT YOU?  I THINK YOU DO...I WOULD HAVE SHOT YOU

LONG TIME AGO BUT I DON'T HAVE A OTHER FUCKING GUN...

EVERYONE IN THIS COUNTRY HAS A GUN

EVERY ONE IS SHOOTING EVERYONE ELSE RIGHT AND LEFT

ONLY ME, ONLY FUCKING ME HASN'T SHOT YOU YET

IF I ONLY HAD A GUN YOU WILL BE DEAD AS DOOR NOB LONG TOIME AGO.

JOHN:

IF YOU DON'T TAKE CARE OF THE ATER COMING DOWN

YOU WILL BE SORRY.

SYBIL:

I AM SORRY NOW.

I AM SORRY THAT I GOT STUCK WITH YOU FOR YEARS

I AM SORRY THAT I DON'T How are you?VE A GUN

I AM GOING TO GO TO THE MAYORS OFFICE TOMORROW

TO COMPLAIN ABOUT YOU.

JOHN:

(smirks and make fun of her)

MAYOR? OUR MAYOR HAS THE TIME TO LISTEN TO THE LIKES OF YOU?

IT WILL TAKE YOU AT LEAST ONE YEAR TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT

AND THE MEAN TIME YOU WILL BE SORRY FOR BEING BORN

 MY BATH ROOM IS DAMAGED BECAUSE OF THE LEAK

I WILL GET THE REPAIRS DONE AND YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY

AND PAY A LOT OF MONEY.  I AM GOING TO GIVE MYSELF

A BRAND NEW BATHROOM WITH MARBLE TILES AND ALL

AND YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY THROUGH YOUR FUCKING MINORITY NOSE.

SYBIL:

(screams and screams and bang the door on him and lock the door this time)

GO FUCK YOUR SELF. GO FUCK YOUR SELF.

YOU PIECE OF SHIT

YOU PICE OF FILTH

GO FUCK YOUR MOTHER WHO GAVE BIRTH TO THE LIKES OF YOU...

GO FUCK YOUR SELF..... (screams)

HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO CONCENTRATE ON WRITING?

HOW AM I GOING TO HAVE ANY CREATIVE IDEA AMONGST

THIS UNENDING HORROR?

WHAT A SHITTY LIFE?

WHAT AN AWFUL MESS WITHOUT ANY SOLUTION?

THIS FUCKING ASS HOLE BOTHERS ME, ACCUSES ME FALSLY..

HARASS ME ALL DAY LONG AND ALL NIGHT LONG

AND MY UNFINISHED PLAY IS FINALLY BOOKED...

MY LAST CHANCE TO HAVE ANY KIND OF A CAREER

AND I AM AMONGST A MONSTER WHO WILL KILL ME

EVENTUALLY...I WILL HAVE A HEART ATTCK BECAUSE OF ALL THIS STRESS

BEFORE I BUY A GUN OR GET AN APPOINTMENT WITH ANY OF THESE

ORGANIZATIONS SUCH AS URBAN JUSTICE, LEGAL AID LAWYER, HUMAN RIGHTS

CENTERS, MAYOR'S OFFICE, THE CITY COUNCIL'S OFFICE...

SOME WELL WISHERS GAVE ME ALL THOSE NAMES TO SEEK FREE HELP

AND I HAVE TRIED BUT EVERY TIME I GO TO ANY OFFICE, THEY INFORM ME THAT

THE PERSON I WANT TO SEE IS OUT FOR LUNCH OR GONE HOME FOR THE DAY.

IT'S AMAZING, THE DAY How are you?D JUST STARTED AND THE PERSON OF MY

INTEREST HAS ALREADY GONE HOME FOR THE DAY.

YOU SEE WHEN YOU SEEK HELP FOR FREE

THEY ALREADY KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE LEAST IMPORTANT PERSON

DOWN AT THE BOTTOM OF THE LADDER AND BY THE TIME MY

TURN WILL COME, IWOULD HAVE BEEN THROWN OUT OF THE

BUILDING AND WOULD BE A HOMELESS PERSON.

I WISH THE HOMELESS WERE STILL IN TOMPKIN SQUARE PARK SO I WILL HAVE

SOME COMPANY...

BUT THEY ARE ALL DEAD AND GONE...I WONDER WHERE DID THEY ALL GO?

I MEAN THE ONES WHO ARE STILL ALIVE...

THEY WERE CHASED OUT OF THE PARK BY POLICE MEN ON HORSES...

BEATING AND ARRESTING THEM...

IT WAS A SCARY SIGHT.

SINCE THEN THE WORD HOMELESS HAS ALWAYS SCARED ME

AND THIS BASTARD, WHITE FASCIT NEIGHBOR OF MINE

IS TRYING VERY HARD TO MAKE ME A HOMELESS IMMIGRANT

WOMAN OF COLOR...

I HAVE TO BUY A GUN BEFORE THAT HAPPENS

BUT RIGHT NOW I HAVE TO FUCKING LET HIM GO

FROM MY MIND AND CONCENTRATE ON MY UNFINISHED PLAY

AND GET READY TO FINISH IT AND SUBMIT IT

AND THAT'S MY ONLY CHANCE OF A DECENT FUTURE

AND THAT IS IN CASE IT'S A SUCCESS AND MAKE

PRODUCERS A LOT OF MONEY

THEN FOR SURE I WILL BUY MY OWN TOWN HOUSE LIKE ALL THE

SUCCESSFUL PLAYWRIGHTS WHO ARE ALWAYS CHERISHED BY THEIR

OTHER SUCCESSFUL PLAYWRIGHT WHO LIVES NEXT TO THEM IN THEIR

OWN TOWNHOUSES...

WHAT A GLAMAROUS LIFE...

THAT'S REAL AMERICA

THAT'S REAL SUCCESS...

A PLAYWRIGHT WITH A TONY, A PULITZER, A BROADWAY SHOW AND A TOWN

HOUSE OF HIS OWN...

AND ME?

PLEASE...

I HAVEN'T TAKEN A SHOWER IN AMERICA FOR THE LAST ONE YEAR

BECAUSE OF THE POWERFUL AMERICAN NEIGHBOR AND NO GOLES OR

URBAN JUSTICE HAS COME TO MY RESCUE.

MAYBE I SHOULD SHOOT MYSELF.

PROBLEM STILL REMAINS.

NO GUN.

I NEVER HAVE THE THINGS I NEED WHEN I NEED THEM.

I WAS FOR SURE NOT EQUIPPED FOR AMERICA.

FOR SURE NOT EQUIPPED FOR THIS CULTURAL HUB, NYC....

DANCERS

DANCERS:

A SHORT PLAY
BY
BINA SHARIF

copyright:binasharif 2019

CHARACTERS

JESSICA: A WOMAN OF COLOR

MARY: A WHITE WOMAN

TWO DANCERS PREPARING OR A PERFORMANCE

(Jessica has just finished her rehearsal

Mary is at the bar doing her warm ups.

Jessica approaches her when Mary finishes

JESSICA:

ARE YOU ALRIGHT MARY?

MARY:
(In a very strange mood which is kind of un-expected)

YES,  WHY? WHY DO YOU ASK?

JESSICA:

BECAUSE YOU SEEM PALE

MARY:

THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN BUT I AM ALRIGHT AND WHY SHOULD I NOT LOOK

PALE? I AM PALE.  I AM OF IVORY SHADE WHICH LOOKS AS PALE AS A PALE PEARL

AND I LOOK THAT WAY...UNLIKE YOU...

MARY:

WHAT? UNLIKE ME?  WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

JESSICA:

YES, THAT'S WHAT I MEAN.  UNLIKE YOU.  YOU WHO COME FROM SOME GOD

FORSAKEN HOT DESERT AND LOOK LIKE AS IF SOME ONE PAINTED YOUR FACE

YOUR ARMS, YOUR LEGS,  YOUR WHOLE BODY WITH DARK CHARCOAL,  WITH

BOILING COAL AND HOT LAVA AND YOU LOOK AND SMELL LIKE JET BLACK INK

ALWAYS BOTHERING ME ABOUT MY SKIN COLOR, INSTEAD OF ACKNOWLEDGING

THAT YOU ARE JEALOUS OF MY IVORY COMPLEXION.  AT THE SAME  TIME YOU

PRETEND TO BE NICE AND CONCERNED, ALWAYS ASKING ME, "WHY DO I LOOK SO

PALE? AM I ALRIGHT? AM I FEELING WELL."

LET E TELL YOU ONCE AND FOR ALL.  I LOOK PALE BECAUSE I AM PALE. I AM WHITE.

NOT OFF WHITE OR OFF OFF WHITE BUT WHITE, PURE WHITE. I AM NOT JET BLACK

LIKE YOU AND YOU ARE JEALOUS, JEALOUS OF MY BEAUTY, MY DELICATE AND

FRAGILE SKIN UNLIKE YOUR SKIN WHICH IS LIKE A PARCHMENT STRETCHED OUT

LIKE TOUGH LEATHER OF CHOCOLATE LAYERING .

THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR SKIN COLOR AND COLOR OF COAL.

YOU MUST COME FROM COAL COUNTRY.  YOU MUST COME FROM THE KINGDOM

OF BLACKNESS, BLACK AS A DEEP DARK NIGHT.

YOU WHO HATES YOURSELF, YOU WHO WANTS TO BE LIKE ME, YOU WHO WANTS TO

, SMELL LIKE ME, INSTEAD YOU WISH THAT MY COMPLEXION IS BECAUSE OF SOME

KIND OF SICKNESS, CONSUMPTION PERHAPS AND YOU WANT TO SHOW EMPATHY

TOWARDS ME BUT MY SWEET BLACK HONEY, DON'T WORRY.  I AM NOT GOING TO
.
DROP DEAD ANY MINUTE SOON.

I AM WELL ENOUGH TO DANCE.  HEALTHY ENOUGH TO DANCE AND BREATH

FREEDOM, FIT ENOUGH TO LOVE, TO LAUGH, TO CONSUME, TO SHOP, TO TRAVEL,

TO LIVE, TO LIVE, TO LIVE FOREVER.

IT'S YOU WHO AFTER SEEING ME DAY AFTER DAY CAN'T BREATH.

IT'S YOU WHO IS GOING TO DIE OF YOUR BLACKNESS OR A HEART ATTACK SOON.

I HOPE YOU STOP BREATHING SOON SO I CAN GET RID OF YOU AND YOUR

 MANIPULATIVE PHONY CONCERNS ABOUT MY WELL BEING.

JESSICA:
(In total shock, Her body is completely still. She is unable to move, unable to react, unable to

comprehend and absorb what just happened to her.  She always knew that she lives in a white an

black world, she knew she is surrounded by racism, bigotry, unpleasantness, but have never

experienced these kinds of emotions, this kind of emotional trauma of such blatant racist attack on

.her person.  She started to grasp for air.  She started struggling...struggling to breath.  She couldn't

breath.  She finally collapsed on the dance floor.)

MARY:
( Jubilant)

I KILLED HER.  I FINALLY KILLED HER.  I GOT RID OF THE NEGRESS IN TEN SECONDS

WHAT THIS COUNTRY COULDN'T ACHIEVE IN 300 YEARS.  I ACHIEVED IT IN A

FRACTION OF A SECOND.  I FINALLY HELPED END THE WHITE AND THE BLACK

PROBLEM.  ALL THIS BULLSHIT...WE HAVE TO BE POLITICALLY CORRECT TOWARDS

BLACKS, TOWARDS PEOPLE OF COLOR.  FUCK PEOPLE OF COLOR.  I WANT TO LIVE

AMONGST WHITE PEOPLE AND WHY NOT?  I AM WHITE, I WANT TO BE AMONGST

WHITE PEOPLE WHO ARE ALL PALE COMPLEXIONED, THIN BODIED, CLAD IN PALY

COLORED CHIFFON SCARVES, SILK GOWNS, CASHMERE JUMPERS AND DANCE ALL

NIGHT WITH TALL, WHITE PALE RICH MEN ALL NIGHT.

I DON'T EVEN WANT BLACK PEOPLE AND PEOPLE OF COLOR AS MY SERVANTS.

THEY GIVE ME TE CREEPS AND I HAVE TO SMILE AND SAY NICE THINGS TO THEM,

HELL NO.

I AM GOING TO SAY RIGHT TO THEIR FACES WHAT WE, THE PALE WHITES OF THIS

ISLAND, THIS VAST WHITE LAND, WE THE OWNERS OF THIS WHITE LAND, WHAT WE

EXACTLY FEEL, HOW WE EXACTLY FEEL ABOUT THEM AND ARE AFRAID OF SAYING

IT BECAUSE OF POLITICAL CORRECTNESS...

CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT THIS WORLD HAS COME TO...W HAVE TO BE POLITICALLY

CORRECT TO OUR SLAVES NOW?

GIVE E A FUCKING BREAK.

AND YOU BLACK AND BLUE WOMAN OF COLR BITCH, STOP BREATHING ALRIGHT...

IF YOU HAVEN'T DONE SO ALREADY...

I NAM NEVER GOING TO CALL THE AMBULANCE... THAT'S FOR SURE...

HELL YES, NO AMBULANCE IS COMING FOR YOU BITCH BECAUSE i AM NEVER

CALLING 911. GOOD LUCK IN BLACK HELL FULL OF PEOPLE OF COLOR....

DANCERS

DANCERS

MARY

JESSICA

DANCERS

DIRECTION:

(When Mary came in the rehearsal room, Jessica was already at the bar and didn't seem like the person Mary thought she knew. so she waited near the bar till Jessica finished her exercises and
then went to her.

MARY:

ARE YOU ALRIGHT JESSICA?

JESSICA:

YES,WHY?  WHY DO YOU ASK?

MARY:

BECAUSE YOU SEEM PALE

JEESSICA:

THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN.  I AM ALRIGHT.

AND WHY SHOULD I NOT LOK PALE?  I AM PALE.

I AM OF IVORY SHADE WHICH IS AS PALE AS A PALE PEARL

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY
BY
BINA SHARIF

copyright:binasharif 2019

the play includes following  playlets.  (The play is about writing the play under
calm and peaceful atmosphere in the playwright's own home but unfortunately
she has a nasty neighbor who is racist and aggressive and at all hours of day and night disturbs her
concentration with false accusations of complaints such as,
MAKING NOISE: (making noise?  she sits for hours to write very quietly, no music, no tv, no pet
no children to run around, but he keeps coming back knocking at her door, knocking at the pipes from down below, ordering her to be quiet)

COMPLAINS OF WATER COMING DOWN A LEAK, A LEAK, A LEAK

(She hasn't
 even turned a water tap to drink a drop of water or to brush her teeth or to water the plants
but the neighbor has some kind of agenda against this lady for years but at this moment she is really
getting upset and frustrated because finally after writing many plays she has been invited to submit one of her play for a big opportunity and she us going through many of her plays to decide which one to send or this major grant.  So she hasn't slept for many nights, keep looking at certain parts of her
plays to decide which one will fit the bill but her agitation reaches a point where there is no return.)

CERTAIN PLAYS SHE GOES THROUGH IN THE SELECTION PROCESS

SYBIL'S DESPAIR

FUN PLAY

PREDICTION

THE DANCER

THE WINDOW

She finally decide to write a new play and submit that one because it suddenly seem perfect and the name of the play she starts to write is....

THE LEAK, THE RED LEAK.

SO MUCH STRESS...FAR TOO MUCH STRESS FOR ONE LIFE TIME

TOO MUCH STRESS...FAR TOO MUCH STRESS FOR ONE IFE TIME

FIVE THOUSAND YEARS OF THERAPY

FIIVE THOUSAND YEARS OF THERAPY

SYBIL GOES BACK TO THERAPIST FOR HER ON-GOING DESPAIR

SYBIL:

I am un-able to decide what to do, which way to go  any more...

THERAPST:

What do you mean any more?

SYBIL:

 I mean recently

THERAPIST:

Is this a joke?

SYBIL:

What do you mean?

THERAPIST:

How long have you been in therapy?

SYBIL:

As long as I remember

THERAPIST:

Then why did you say, "ANYMORE?"

SYBIL:

I don't know.   just said it...

THERAPIST:

Are you aware that you are in therapist's office/

What ever you say here is taken extremely seriously.

It's like being in the police office or in the prosecutor's office,

or in the detective's office.  For example, if you say something like,

'I have thoughts of killing so and so" . Or, "I am thinking of killing someone."

That means that you are a dangerous person, a person who needs to be watched.

You can't ust say in court of law, "Oh! I don't know, I just said so and so."

There are consequences of your thoughts which lead to your actions and actions

of violent thoughts can be violent...

SYBIL:

You are scaring me.  You are behaving like I have already killed someone and I am on trial and you

are the prosecutor who wants to hang me. I thought you were my therapist who wants to help me...

THERAPIST:

And I am helping you by making you aware that you can't just say things, things which have no

meaning to you but might have a terrible meaning for some one else...

SYBIL:

But I am the one who is in trouble.  It's me who need help, it's me who can't make decisions...

THERAPIST:

Since when?

SYBIL:

Since when what?

THERAPIST:

Since how long have you been un-able to make decisions?

SYBIL:

All my life...

THERAPIST:

That's the problem...

SYBIL:

I know that.  I know it very well.  I have known it for a very long time...

THERAPIST:

And what do you want me to do about it?

SYBIL:

I don't understand what you are saying?  I have a disability...

THERAPIST:

Just one disability?

SYBIL:

What do you mean?

THERAPIST:

I asked you if decision making is your only disability?

SYBIL:

As far as I know...

THERAPIST:

You want me to surprise you?

SYBIL:

Surprise me about what?

THERAPIST

About your other disabilities?

SYBIL:

Oh1 my god...

THERAPIST:

Yes, you can say that...but one disability leads to another.

It's like your bad knee.  If not treated causes problems to the other knee.

Now you have both knees in trouble.  It started with one knee right?

And it went to the other knee, the other knee trying to help you instead you helping

the first knee.  Your second knee is more sympathetic to your first knee than you were

and look what happened to your second knee because of your carelessness...

It's just like that.  You are disable to decide, right?

SYBIL:

Yes.  Right now I am totally un-able to decide about anything

THERAPIST;

So you are disable?

SYBIL:

In some way yes...

THERAPIST:

What do you mean?  In some ways?

SYBIL:

In the decision making department

THERAPIST:

And you think you are perfect in other departments?

SYBIL:

Not perfect.  Who is perfect?

THERAPIST:

Many people are perfect

SYBIL:

Maybe?  But we have been told that human beings are not perfect

THERAPIST:

It's the excuse of disabled people.

SYBIL:

It's not an excuse.  It's a fact

THERAPIST:

What fact?

SYBIL:

Fact about human beings.  We are capable of making mistakes.  We are not perfect.

THERAPIST:

What mistakes imperfect human beings make?

SYBIL:

I don't know.  I can' know about the whole human race...

THERAPIST:

Do you know about yourself?

SYBIL:

About myself?

THERAPIST:

Yes, about yourself...what other mistakes have you made beside not being able to

decide about what shoes to wear, or what dress o wear, or what color blouse to buy?

SYBIL:

Yes,  I have problems about all the other things you mentioned but those are not the mistakes

those are the decisions.  I have told ou again and again that I have a problem making decisions

and you are being hostile and intimidating about my vulnerability...

THERAPIST:

I am not insensitive to your vulnerability.  But thats not vulnerability, that's stupidity...

you are now un-able to decide what shoes to wear, what dress to wear,  what blouse to buy..

and you are calling me hostile.  Do you want me to pamper you and tell you it's ok.  it's perfectly

ok to always ask others, "Should i buy black blouse or red blouse?  Should I wear sneakers or

heels today?  Don't you have any belief in you?  Any sense of trust in you?  These are ordinary things

if you can't decide about little things how can you decide about big things?

SYBIL:

That's exactly why I am here.  Thats exactly why I am paying you my money year after year after

year.  I have spent my whole inheritance on this this so called therapy which doesn't give any

answers towards healing but only asks aggressive questions about the problems.

THERAPIST:

Your problems are so immense that aggressive questions have to be asked

SYBIL:

I have no problem except decision making process....

THERAPIST:

Listen to her people...

SYBIL:

What people?  You have other people in the room?

THERAPIST:

You see any other person here?

SYBIL:

But you said, "Listen to her people."

THERAPIST:

That was a metaphorical statement

SYBIL:

Why did you have to make a metaphorical statement when there is no body here except us...

THERAPIST:

That's when one makes metaphorical conclusions when there is no one else is around but

you can still see people.  That's called, a metaphor ...

SYBIL:

But therapy must not deal with metaphor.  Therapy is real.  Isn't it?  It's between two people,

the patient and the therapist.  They are both real.  Talking about real problems and trying to find a

solution...

HERAPIST:

W are talking about problems but that doesn't mean we can solve them...

SYBIL:

What?  What did you say?  Why am I here if you can''t solve my problems? Why am I paying my

money?

HERAPIST:

Money can't solve all the problems.  Money actually causes more problems.  If you didn't have

money o pay me, you would have tried very hard to solve your own problems.  It's because of the

money that you are here.  There are two problems here.  Your problem about lack of your ability

to decide about important things and petty things and your money.  Your money makes you incapable

o solve your own problems.  So with the joy of having money you seek help....

SYBIL:

But it's important to seek the advice of an expert if you can't solve problems on your own.

I mean this is America.  We are Americans.  Help of all kinds is available here.  How o dress, how to

sneeze, how to be popular, how to be famous, how to speak properly, how to assert your self without

yelling...I mean if you start yelling, no one takes you seriously...people completely ignore the

problem which made you yell to begin with.  All they keep repeating is.  "You are yelling.  You are

yelling.  "Stop yelling" . 'She is yelling"  'You are yelling."  She is yelling."  and by that time, the

problem which made you yell was totally ignored.  So there are experts to go to to seek help...

especially when you have money.  Thats what America is all about.  Have money, have problems,

and solve them by paying money to the experts like I have been doing for a very long time

but I have a feeling that you are not interested to solve my problem...

THERAPIST:

I am interested.  I am very interested to solve your problem.  I am an expert.  I earn my money

by solving problems.  But the problem here is that you hired me for one problem.  Your lack of ability

to make decisions.  hats what you are paying me for.  But your inability to make choices, make

decisions have causes so many other problems...like I gave you he example of one knee problem

which caused the second knee problem, which caused the back problem, legs problem, feet problem,

spine problem but the patient went for physiotherapy only for one knee problem.  Patient is paying

only for one knee, one problem, like you and that one single problem has caused so many other

problems that with only one fee, the doctor, the therapist, the physiotherapist can not treat all the

subsequent problems and not ge paid for all the multiple problems. we ae here in America.

Everything is specialized.  Different doctor for the foot, different doctor for he mouth, nose, eyes,

liver, kidneys,  stomach, Utres, heart, limbs, throat, thyroid, eyes, lymph glands, blood vessels...

I mean you have to pay a lot of money, many different visits, to many different doctors for many

different problems and you fortunately have money.

So if you are serious about treatment , you have to think and  decide if you want to be healthy

you have to pay for all the other problems which came from your single problem of not being

able to make decisions.  Remember that you came to me years ago...for one problem and

because of that now you have so many more problems...If you are willing to pay me 10 times

more, I will be glad to elp you....

Oh! gee, we went overtime.  My next patient must be waiting in the waiting room.

Now I am sure she as well has developed a second problem of being neglected by her

own therapist but that's also your fault,  because you have never been able to understand

how the system works here in America...Let me tell you one more time.

Here in America, one problem leads to another problem and that is why we have so many experts

and that's why every you and every one else have to have tons and tons of money to get American

expertise............

WASTE

WASTE

Wasn't wasteland written by T.'S. ELIOT?

WHAT A WASTEFUL DAY, WHAT A WASTEFUL NIGHT!

WHAT A WASTEFUL DAY, WHAT A WASTEFUL NIGHT!

Every day I say,

I will do this

I will do that

Every day I do the same, nothingness

Next day I say,

I will do this

I will do that

Every day I do the same, nothingness

then the next day I say,

I will do this

I will do that

Tomorrow I will do this

Tomorrow I will do that

Then tomorrow comes

and then...

Then every tomorrow I do the same, nothingness

Then the next day I say,

Tomorrow I will do this

Tomorrow I will do that

Then every tomorrow I do the same, nothingness.............

I wonder what's wrong with me?

I for sure don't know what's wrong with me...

But for sure something is wrong with me

Something hugely important

Something of immense immense importance is wrong with me

Time, the most valuable thing in life

I waste

I waste

I waste

So sad that I can't stop wasting time...

Time which will never come back...

From where ever its been gone

Time, which will never come back...
f the fact that
I waste that time

I wish I will stop

Stop wasting my cherished time

My valuable property

My most important thing in this life

In only one life...

I keep wasting...

I am aware of the fact that I am wasting my time...

But I can't stop...

Oh! how I wish that I would stop

Wasting my time...

But I can't...

It's become an addiction

Like people on their phones

Like people on social media

like people on Instagram

Like the addiction of drugs

Like the addiction of alcohol

I have none of that...

But still waste my time

I don't know how?

But I know I waste a hell of my time

Then I say,

Tomorrow I will do this

Tomorrow I will do that

But then tomorrow I do the same

Nothingness.........

One day I realized that while I was with a very successful business man, a friend...

I realized that I while I was lamenting about the demise of the world, the wars, the persecution,

of innocent people, killings, murders, corruption, political turmoils, climate change, sex trafficing,

hunger in the third world, persecution of Muslims in Kashmir, China, Afghanistan, Western world,

Arab world, poverty, floods, lack of respect for the artist,  every other problem in the world,

HE KEPT COUNTING BUNDLE OF HIS MONEY...JUST NODDING HIS HEAD ONCE IN A

WHILE AS IF HE WAS PAYING ATTENTION TO WAHT I WAS SAYING BUT HE WAS

COMPLETELY OBLIVIOUS ABOUT WHAT I WAS SAYING....

AND I REALIZED HOW I WAS WASTING MY TIME

HOW I HAVE WASTED MY VALUABLE TIME

TIME WHICH WILL NEVER COME BACK

AND HOW I MUST STOP WASTING MY TIME ON PEOPLE LIKE HIM WITH SO MUCH

MONEY...MONEY WHICH COMES EVERY DAY UNLIKE TIME, WHICH NEVER COMES

BACK....MONEY FOR BUSINESS ALWAYS COMING BACK....BUT TALKING TO MONEY

PEOPLE WHOSE CONCERN IS NOTHING BUT MONEY, THAT TIME, TALKING TO THEM

THE MONEY PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO OTHER CONCERN THAN MONEY....

THAT WASTEFUL TIME, THAT PARTICULAR TIME...WHAT A WASTE OF THAT

CHERISHED TIME OF MINE...

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLAY

PLACE:  NYC

A BUILDING IN THE EAST VILLAGE

SYBIL JOHNSON:  A PLAYWRIGHT

PAUL:  A NEIGBOR OF SYBIL

TIME:  PRESENT

SET:

A WRITING TABLE ANDA CHAIR CENTER STAGE

A LOVE SEAT UPSTAGE LEFT

LOTS OF BOOKS ON THE FLOOR

A HUGE BAG FULL OF SCRIPTS ON THE FLOOR NEXT TO THE BOOKS

SOME SCRIPTS ON THE TABLE.

A FEW BOKS ON THE TABLE, ONE OF THEM IS BY ALBERT CAMUS

DIRECTIONS:

LIGHTS COME UP

SYBIL WALKS IN...

SEARCHING FROM THE HUGE BAG ON THE FLOOR

THEN GOES TO THE TABLE AND LOOKS AT SOME SCRIPTS

PICK UP CAMUS BOOK AND STARTS TO READ FROM IT.

THERAPY OF A DREAM PLay

THERAPY OF A DEAM PLAY

NOTE BOOK 5

NOTE BOOK 5

"I MUST REJOICE BEYOND THE BOUNDS OF TIME,
THOUGH THE WORLD MAY SHUDDER AT MY JOY,
AND ITS COARSENESS, KNOW NOT WHAT I MEAN"        Jan Van Ruysbroeck

PETRONIUS

'SHREWED OSERVER
MARVELOUS PAINER
DISPASSIONATELY, WITH AN ENTIRE LACK OF PREJUDICE OR ANIMOSITY,
HE DESCRIBES THE EVERY DAY LIFE OF ROME, RECORDING THE MANNERS AND MORALS IN THE LIVELY LITTLE  CHAPTERS OF SATYRICON."      Huysmans

'TALK TO NO ONE
SEE NO ONE
INDULGE NO ONE
THINK OF YOUR PRECIOUS TIME BEFORE MAKING ANY COMMITMENTS WITH ANY ONE
WRITE REVIEWS

PLAYS SEEN IN DUBLIN
GLASS MENAGRIE
2417
OVER RIDE
LAUGH
COTTON FINGERS

USE YOUR TIME WELL
LEARN TECH
BUY SMART PHONE

SINCE NO OTHER PAST ADVICE BY ME FOR ME HAS WORKED SO FAR...

THE BRAND NEW ADVICE BY ME FOR MYSELF

"DO ONLY WHAT YOU LIKE TO DO...NOT WHAT YOU SHOULD DO

RIGHT NOW I LIKE TO SIT HERE AND READ INSTEAD OF GOING TO THE MUSEUM

SO DO NOT WORRY ABOUT IT, JUST SIT HERE AT SHELLBOURNE AND READ

MUSEUM CAN WAIT...MUSEUM WILL ALWAYS BE THERE...

YES, BT I WON'T BE HERE IN DUBLIN AND THE MUSEUM I THOUGHT I WOULD LIKE

TO GO TO IS HERE IN DUBLIN...

THEN GO TO THE MUSEUM...

BUT I DON'T FEEL LIKE GOING RIGHT NOW...I FEEL LIKE READING THIS INTERESTING

BOOK..AGAINST NATURE ALSO CALLED THE YELLOW BOOK BY OSCAR WILDE IN HIS
BOOK, PICTURE OF DORIAN GRAY."

THEN JUST READ THE BOOK AND DON'T FEEL BAD ABOUT GOING OR NOT GOING TO

THE MUSEUM...I JUST TOLD YOU EARLIER THAT YOU SHOULD DO WHAT YOU FEEL

LIKE DOING AND NOT DO WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING...

ENJOYING YOUR SELF SHOULDN'T BE A DUTY...

RELAX AND ENJOY YOUR TIME THE WAY YOU WANT, THE WAY YOU LIKE...

PUT NO CONDITIONS ON YOUR SELF...

EIHER GET UP AND GO TO THE MUSEUM OR JUST READ YOUR BOOK AND ENJOY

YOURSELF.  I REMEMBER YOU ALWAYS HAVING DIFFICULTY MAKING CHOICES

SINCE SN EARLY AGE...IT REFLECTS SOME KIND OF GUILT..DO YOU HAVE GUILT?

I MUST, SINCE YOU SAY SO AND YOU ARE MY LIFE LONG THERAPIST AND

OBVIOUSLY

NOT A VERY GOOD ONE SINCE I AM THE SAME AND HAVE EXACTLY THE SAME

DIFFICULTIES SINCE MY CHILDHOOD...WHY AM I PAYING YOU?

BUT THATS A JOKE...BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT PAYING ME, YOU HAVE NEVER PAID

ME...ITS LIKE WORKING IN NON PROFIT THEATER...NO PAY...NEVER ANY PAY...WE

ARE NON PROFIT...SO WHY THE FUCK YOU DON'T CLOSE YOUR NON PROFIT

THEATERS?  BECAUSE  WE DO MAKE PROFIT FOR OURSELF, WHAT WE MEAN BY

PROFIT IS THAT WE JUST PAY OURSELVES AND SINCE WE ARE NON PROIT WE CAN'T

PAY ANY ONE ELSE...THATS WHY WE CAN'T CLOSE, WE HAVE A REGULAR CHECK COMING EVERY WEEK...ITS OUR LIVELY HOOD...AND ME?  WHAT ABOUT ME?

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

WHAT ABOUT MY CHECK?

WHO TOLD YOU THAT YOU ARE GOING TO GET A CHECK?

OH! I THOUGHT...

YOU THOUGHT WRONG...WE TOLD YOU, "WE ARE NON -PROFIT, THAT MEANT THAT

YOU WON'T GET A CHECK...ONLY WE WILL GET A CHECK...DO YOU UNDERSTAND?

"OH1 EVERYTHING IS SO CONFUSING HERE IN AMERICA...

"NOTHING IS CONFUSING.  EVERYTHING IS CRYSTAL CLEAR..."PROFIT IS ONLY FOR

AMERICA AND ITS INSTITUTIONS  EVEN IF THEY ARE NON=PROFIT..

"WHY SHOULD YOU CALL IT NON-PROFIT WHEN YOU ARE GETTING PROFIT??

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU ARE AN OUTSIDER, YOU ARE NOT AN

AMERICAN...THIS IS HOW IT WORKS HERE, TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT...

I THINK AS YOUR LIFE LONG THERAPIST, YOU SHOULD LEAVE IT...GO SOME PLACE

WHERE YOU GET THE CHECK...

WHERE?

BE IN-CHARGE OF A NON -PROFIT THEATER...

THATS A GOOD ADVICE...BUT I AM OUTSIDER AND ONLY AN AMERICAN CAN BE

IN-CHARGE OF A NON-PROFIT THEATER...

OH! PLEASE, GET OUT OF THIS BULL SHIT THEATER BULL SHIT...

SIT DOWN AND READ YOUR BOOK, THE ONE YOU WEE READING BEFORE YOU

ASKED FOR MY ADVICE...

I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR ADVICE, YOU JUST KEEP GIVING IT TO ME...YOU ARE THE

MONKEY ON MY BACK...

"I AM A SMART MONKEY, LISTEN TO ME AND YOU WON'T FAIL...

"TOO LATE...

"NEVER TOO LATE IF YOU LISTEN TO ME...

"LET ME REPEAT MYSELF

TALK TO NO ONE

SEE NO ONE

INDULGE NO ONE

THINK OF YOUR PRECIOUS TIME BEFORE YOU MAKE ANY COMMITMENT TO ANY

ONE OR ANYTHING...

"DO WHAT YOU LIKE TO DO AND NOT WHAT YOU SHOULD DO AND I TELL YOU DO

NO THEATER..JUST GO AND GET A CHECK SOMEHOW...

"THEATER IS OUT...CHECK IS IN...AND IF THE CHECK IS NOT IN...THEATER IS STILL

OUT...NOW WHAT WERE WE TALKING ABOUT?"

"I DON'T FEEL LIKE DOING ANYTHING"

"THEN DO NOTHING...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING...IF YOU DO, THE CHECK DOESN'T COME AND IF YOU DON'T DO THE CHECK DOESN'T COME...SO WHAT THE FUCK...DO NOTHING. LISTEN TO YOUR FEELING...YOUR FEELING IS THE ONLY THING WHICH MATTER ESPECIALLY RIGHT NOW AND NOW I AM GOING TO SAY GOOD NIGHT...I NEED REST MYSELF...THERAPISTS NEED SOME SLEEP AS WELL...SEE YOU TOMORROW...REST, GO TO BED...SLEEP IS THE ONLY BALM TO THE CONFUSED...

END OF THERAPY SESSION